The beginning and the end of copywriting

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Today being January 1st, I find it an excellent opportunity to wish you a happy New Year and to point out the surprising significance of January.

As I learned when I was still young and very stupid, January is named after the Roman god Janus, the two-faced deity of doors, gates, and more broadly, beginnings and endings.

I say I was still very stupid when I first learned this, because my reaction was, “A god of doors? How lame. What’s next? A god of faucets?”

It was only later, after I read a book or two, that I found out just how fundamental the idea of a door — an entry point, an exit point — really is to the human mind.

Because all human perception, down at the most basic neurological level, is based on difference, contrast.

Right now, bunches of your neurons are frantically working to determine where they can draw a line, and call everything before it one thing, everything after it another, and convince you these are somehow meaningfully separate, and discard the many other details that don’t fit into that picture of the world.

Without this Januarial work of drawing lines and creating doors to come up with discrete concepts, we couldn’t really have any higher-level thinking.

That’s why it makes sense that January, the month of doors, comes before, say March, named after the Roman god of war, Mars.

“That’s truly fascinating,” I hear you saying. “I had no idea of the depth of your classical learning or your smattering of popsci neuroscience. But what does this have to do with marketing or making money or really anything else I might actually care about on January 1st?”

Everything. It has everything to do with it.

This basic observation, of the outsized importance of beginnings and endings, repeats itself at every level of the sales job.

At the level of entire sales campaigns, where the opening of the campaign and the closing of the campaign bring in almost all the sales…

At the level of individual sales letters, where the headline and lead on the one end, and the offer and close at the other end, represent 80%-95% of the effectiveness or sales pull of that letter…

At the level of individual sales claims or promises, such as the following:

“The simple 12-word-sentence that will make you the #1 candidate more often than you would ever believe.”

That’s a bullet written by A-list copywriter Gary Bencivenga, considered by many to be the greatest of the greats because he won so often against other A-list copywriters.

You might think Gary’s bullet is just a simple, direct response promise. But there’s a surprising amount of subtle psychology that goes into this bullet, with a particular emphasis on what Gary chooses to put first in this bullet, and what to put last.

I won’t explain that subtle psychology here, but I will tell you the following:

Wouldn’t it be nice to start this New Year acquiring a new skill, a truly valuable skill, a skill that few others possess?

Wouldn’t it be nice to acquire one of the greatest skills you can have as a copywriter, whether you write for clients or for your own business?

Wouldn’t it be nice to acquire a skill that ultimately all effective copy comes from?

You probably know what I’m talking about.

But if you’d like to make 100% sure, or if you’d actually like to use this January 1st to get yourself this skill and the associated bump in fortune that this skill can bring, then take a look here:

https://bejakovic.com/cr/

Hell has no fury like a wizard scorned

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My email yesterday about a needy blackbird drew a bunch of amused replies from people who enjoyed the story.

But it also resulted in an unsubscribe rate of 3x the usual.

That’s okay. In fact, it was kind of the point of the email.

However, among all those quiet unsubscribes, there was one that was more vocal. That more vocal unsubscriber reported my email yesterday as spam.

Spam = unsolicited and unwanted email sent out to an indiscriminate recipient list

That’s not something I do. I make sure my emails are solicited and wanted (the headline of my optin page says “Prepare to decide”). I certainly don’t want to waste my time or effort or email marketing tokens writing to an indiscriminate recipient list.

So I got curious who this spam-reporter was, and how he possibly got on my list.

I put in his email address into Gmail and what popped up was this:

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That’s fucking hilarious… Great Email

Cheers

===

… which was a reply he sent me to an email I wrote in the character of Bejako Baggins, about a deliverability wizard who approached me out of the cold, only for me to guide him back to the door.

The fact is, the spam-reporter above was the actual deliverability wizard from that story. He had opted in to my list a few days before that email and had written me a flattering message about my emails, along with concern that they weren’t getting through to him quickly enough.

All that’s to say, in the words of William Congreve, heaven has no rage, nor hell a fury, like a wizard scorned.

Because wizards — and men and elves and hobbits also — get outraged and furious when they don’t get what they want. When they feel ignored or dismissed.

But what to do?

You can’t go through life doing what everybody else wants of you all the time.

That means you will inevitably face some rage and fury, and have to learn to shrug it off. It’s not always about you. Many times, it’s just about people not getting what they want.

Anyways, this being the last day of the year, I will link to that Bejako Baggins email. Multiple people have written me to say it was my most entertaining email of the year.

Starting tomorrow, I’ll work to beat it.

But if you want a quick and fantastical story for New Year’s Eve:

https://bejakovic.com/you-dont-want-to-sell-to-a-hobbit-like-me/

Dating and business advice to a needy blackbird

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A few days ago, I was minding my own business, washing the dishes. The weather was warm so I opened the window.

Just as I was in the middle of scrubbing the salad bowl, a little blackbird landed on my windowsill.

“CHEEP,” said the blackbird.

“Oh hello there,” I said. “How do you do?”

The blackbird paced for a moment and then sat down on the windowsill. He seemed to be getting comfortable, which made me frown and pause my dishwashing. And then the blackbird spoke:

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Interesting that you ask that. Very interesting.

Something I am really struggling with at the moment is securing a mate.

I can’t get a mate for my familybuilding services. Even when I catch the eye of female blackbirds, they seem to smell my neediness from a mile away even if I don’t reveal it intentionally.

I wanted to ask:

How would you go about getting a mate if:

===

… and then the blackbird listed his unique mate-getting situation, which happens to be the same unique situation faced by all single blackbirds, crows, and seagulls, as well as by all individuals, whether human or avine, who are hoping to go from zero to one in any endeavor that involves selling yourself.

I’ve long ago decided that I don’t want to be in the business of taking people or birds from zero to one.

So I just nodded to the blackbird in understanding, picked him up, placed him on the outside window sill, and closed the window shut.

That said, I do have one piece of advice.

I’m only sharing it because it applies to anybody who is looking to do anything new and frightening, whether they are beginners or much more advanced.

It applies to newbie copywriters looking for their first client… to experienced copywriters looking to send their first email to their own list… to business owners looking to go into a drastically more upscale market and charge 2x or 3x or 10x of what they are charging now.

It also applies to securing a mate. In fact, this piece of advice is something I heard from the infamous pick-up coach Owen Cook, aka RSD Tyler, the villain in Neil Strauss’s book The Game.

Owen was talking about the horrifying prospect of flying up to an attractive and unfamiliar female blackbird, in the middle of a park with lots of other blackbirds around, and striking up a fun and natural interaction.

Perfectly easy if you have total belief in yourself and your worth.

Perfectly impossible if you are overwhelmed by fear and self-doubt.

So here’s Owen’s observation:

“The halfway point between fear and total belief is indifference.”

You can’t go from fear and neediness to total belief and confidence.

But you can go from fear and neediness to indifference.

One way to do it is repeat exposure in a short enough period of time.

Go and cheep at seven attractive and unfamiliar blackbirds today. Each of those interactions might go horribly, though they probably won’t.

But whatever the outcome of the interactions, by the end of the seven, you will realize you are still alive. In fact, you are perfectly fine.

Do this a few days in a row, and those innate survival mechanisms, which underlie both fear and neediness, will begin to get habituated and calm down. You will start to get indifferent. And that’s the halfway point to total belief and confidence.

In other words, if you think you have a neediness problem… what you really got is an activity problem.

That’s all the free advice from Bejako’s windowsill for today.

If you’d like to buy something from me, I can recommend my Simple Money Emails training.

​​No, Simple Money Emails won’t replace the need to actually write and send emails, whether for your own business or for a client business.

But Simple Money Emails can teach you my effective one-two system for writing emails, much like this one, that make sales, keep readers reading, and keep birds chirping. If that’s an outcome you’d like as well:

https://bejakovic.com/sme

Business owner asks for a copy critique and I relent out of curiosity

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A couple days ago, I got an email from a new reader of my 10 Commandments book. He had signed up to my list to get the apocryphal 11th commandment. And he wrote me to say:

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I LOVED the book, John. But I need more help with my copywriting. I write a 1,000 word blog post every day. I have also written 6 best selling books. Can you give me some guidance?

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I wrote back to clarify exactly what kind of guidance he meant. He replied to ask if I would critique some of his existing copy.

I winced. What a bind.

Because I don’t do copy critiques any more. And yet…

This reader had bought my book, and then he wrote in to say nice things about it. Plus, he’s written 6 best-selling books himself. Plus (something not obvious from his message above), his books are about B2B sales.

So he can write, he knows sales, but he still needs help with copy?

I got curious.

I asked him to send over one piece of copy. He did — an email promoting a $1,500 training program.

I won’t repeat my copy critique here. It wouldn’t make much sense or have much meaning for you.

All I will say is that, yes, there were problems with the copy. But there were more important problems with the actual promotion of this offer, and the way the promo was structured.

The stuff that I told him is stuff you would know by osmosis if you read my emails regularly… that you would take for granted… that you couldn’t imagine any other way, simply because it’s always there in every promotion I ever run, to the point that I don’t even think of mentioning it because it’s so transparent and so obvious to me.

And yet, here was somebody who knows sales… and who knows how to write… and yet who missed this stuff completely.

That’s not to rag on this guy. I’m sure he could make a big corporate sale where I would lay an egg. And the stuff I know wouldn’t be hard to teach him.

But the point remains:

Don’t underestimate the legitimate value of what you know. If you know copywriting and direct marketing, even at a basic level, you have real and valuable skills that business owners can profit from.

In 2024, I’ll create some kind of offer to help business owners structure their own successful promotions.

But 2024 is such a long way away.

For now, the closest thing I can offer you is an email I wrote this past summer, after finishing my promo of Steve Raju’s ClientRaker training.

It’s far from a complete how-to run-a-promo offer. Plus, I already shared this email a few days ago.

And yet, if you sell stuff online, via email, you might get an idea here to guide you to making more money. Here’s the link if you’re curious:

https://bejakovic.com/10-lessons-from-the-clientraker-promo/

13 things mentally strong marketers do

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I will tell you about the 13 things in a second, but let me first set it up with a story:

Yesterday I listened to an interview with Amy Morin, who has created a publishing empire starting with her 2014 book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do.

​​Morin has since written 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do… Strong Women Don’t Do… Strong Couples Don’t Do… you get idea.

She has sold hundreds of thousands or millions of copies of her books.

And yet, she said that she never hit bestseller status in the first week after publication.

In fact, the original 13 Things book took a whole year to reach bestseller status.

How did it happen?

A year after Morin published 13 Things, Rush Limbaugh mentioned it on his radio show.

​​”Today I will talk about 13 things mentally strong people don’t do,” Limbaugh said.

But he never got around to it.

That was Monday.

(Are you starting to guess the 13 things that mentally strong marketers do???)

The next day, Limbaugh mentioned 13 Things again. “Yesterday I didn’t manage to get to it, but today I will talk about 13 things mentally strong people don’t do.”

Again the show ran long, and again Rush didn’t talk about Morin’s book or the 13 things inside it.

This went on for the whole week. Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday…

(By the way, we are getting really close to the 13 things that mentally strong marketers do. Bear with me.)

Finally, on Friday, Rush managed to list Morin’s list of 13 things mentally strong people don’t do.

​​But by then, bookstores had already sold out of all copies, and 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do had become a bestseller for the first time.

Point being… should I tell you?

​​Well, I might as well, instead of saving it for another email. The 13 Things Mentally Strong Marketers Do are:

1. Tease

​1. Tease

​3. Oh, I don’t know, tease?

​4. How about teasing for a change?

​5. Tease

​6. Tease

​7. Yep, still teasing

​8. I think you now know where it’s going, and that’s teasing

​9. I’ll give you a hint — it’s not giving away the secret. It’s kind of the opposite of that. Can you guess what it is?

​10. Tease

​11. Just in case it’s not clear: Tease

​12. Tease

​13. And tease some more!

It’s not easy to tease to its fullest effect. You might get queasy along the way. You might get bored. You might give in to angry readers who tell you to stop teasing already and tell them the secret or sell them the product already.

That’s why it takes a mentally strong marketer to tease to its full power.

And now that I’ve told you that, let me quickly mention I will rerelease my Insight Exposed training, all about my unique and supremely valuable journaling and notetaking system, some time in January.

For today, all I can offer you is my Most Valuable Email.

I released that training some 15 months ago.

I’ve been teasing it mercilessly ever since in these emails.

I always think I’ve gone too far, revealed too much, or tapped out reader curiosity.

And yet people continue to buy. So I will continue to tease Most Valuable Email and what the Most Valuable Email trick might be. In case you want to scratch the itch and find out:

https://bejakovic.com/mve/

More thin content inside

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When my masochistic urges become too strong I like to go into ActiveCampaign and read the “reasons why” left behind by people who unsubscribed from my list.

There’s usually nothing good. Unsubscribers either leave the “reason why” blank or they select the uninspired “I don’t want to receive these emails any more.”

But every few months, I come upon a thoughtful and good “reason why” that I can write a daily email around.

It’s been a long time since the last one, but I finally got a new one a few days ago.

This past Saturday, I opened up the ActiveCampaign Pandora’s box, peeked inside, and saw a custom-made “reason why” from an unsubscriber peeking back at me. It just said:

“Thin content”

The irony is that the email this reader unsubscribed from was less thin than usual.

In that Saturday email, I fleshed out the idea that you are not in the business you think you might be in… I gave specific signposts for creating a business that charges drastically more and that people still eagerly buy from… and I included a personal story (featuring a multimillionaire A-list copywriter) to make the whole thing more memorable and easier to go down.

The fact is, I would write thinner emails than this every day, if I only had more time.

Because over the course of working with dozens of clients as an email copywriter, writing 1800+ sales emails over the past 8 years, and contributing my persuasive share to funnels that brought in uncountable millions of dollars in sales, I have found that you don’t want to make your content very thick at all — if thick means burdened with specific how-to information and step-by-step teaching.

Such thick content does little for your reader except make him feel glutted.

And it does nothing for you — if you happen to sell services or info products — other than producing an occasional “thank you” note from people who will never give you money anyhow.

So what to do instead? How do you write emails that make money?

Well, I could tell you right here. But in the interest of making this email thin, fluffy, and profitable, I won’t. Because the fact is, I’ve created an entire training about what goes into emails that sell and make money.

I’ve told you that how-to teaching is not it.

But if you want to see what is it, you can find it via the page below:

https://bejakovic.com/sme

My idea for getting others to pay for my advertising

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Yesterday, as the plane leveled off over the Bavarian Alps, I had a newsletter growth idea.

You might say that’s a waste of pleasant scenery on Christmas Day. But what to do? That’s how ideas seem to work.

They bubble up at the oddest times, when you’re not thinking about subject, triggered by nothing obvious.

Jim Rohn might shrug and say, “mysteries of the mind.”

Anyways, my idea was this:

I have another newsletter besides this one. That other one is in the health space.

The content is good. I know, because my audience says so, and even recommends me to others unbidden. ​​But my list is still small.

I could pay to get more readers onto my other newsletter, and in past I have done so.

But why pay when I might be able to get somebody else to pay?

So my Alps-high idea was to contact a few companies in the space and make them a deal they cannot refuse, or that they certainly can.

The idea is that they pay for my ads. Some modest sum at first, say $1k for one month as a test.

I then run ads on FB promoting my newsletter. And to every new subscriber, I also promote the partner company’s offer on my thank you page, in my welcome sequence, and as the main sponsor of each of my issues.

At the end of the month, we revisit the arrangement.

Did the company make back their $1k? Or is there hope they will do so because they got new customers via my newsletter that will add up to more than $1k in LTV?

If yes, we keep going, increase ad spend, and revisit the agreement one month later.

If no, we call it a failed experiment and that’s that.

That was my idea.

You might say it would never work. All the risk is on the company.

​​True.

I might need something extra — credibility, for example.

To get credibility, I could run an initial campaign with my own money, test out how it does, and have that data when I first pitch this idea to my would-be partner.

Or I might contribute some money myself so they feel I have skin in the game.

Or I might have to offer them a Calas-Powell-Rosenthal-and-Bloch-style guarantee, and say that I will refund their ad spend if the test is not successful.

Whatever. I’ll see. In any case, the bigger point still stands:

You don’t have to go at it alone. As the 21.7 Billion Dollar Man, marketing wizard Jay Abraham, once said:

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In business there is certainly no rule, no law, that says you have to do it alone. You don’t. There are a number of businesses out there that are as motivated if not more so than you are to help grow your business for you. You just never recognized that motivation and asked them, or taken advantage of their willingness to help. And that willingness means they can help finance, they can bring people into your business, all at no cost or risk to you.

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In the training where I heard that, Jay went on to give three concrete examples of his clients who got others to pay for their advertising… or for their operating costs… or even for their sales people.

This Jay Abraham training has been very valuable to me. It sold for something like $297 30 years ago. Today, it would probably sell for $2,997 and maybe much more.

But you can get it for an earth-shattering $12.69, and get hundreds or thousands of dollars in additional valuable ideas. The details are here:

https://overdeliverbook.com/

How to enjoy the holidays and be inspired by your own creativity and smartness

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Today being Christmas, of course I thought it would be a perfect time to book a ticket to fly home. Empty airports… friendly fares… friendlier cabin crew.

And so I did it.

It was a beautiful and sunny morning as I took off from Barcelona today around 9am. The sky was perfectly clear so I could see every gleaming little house as we edged along the Mediterranean coast, by Marseilles and Cannes, and then as we turned inland over the Alps.

The plane flew over thousands of sunny and snowy peaks, and down into the Bavarian flatlands. We landed in Munich.

45 mins later, another plane lifted me up again. More snowy peaks — Germany, Austria, Slovenia, then into Croatia.

The winter clouds finally started to gather as we reached the smoggy grey fortress that is my hometown of Zagreb. But even here, there was still some sunlight — magical for central Europe in December.

Like Little Red Riding Hood, I took the shortest path to my grandmother’s place. What followed was a typically overwhelming Christmas lunch — an appetizer made up of minced pork meat wrapped in sauerkraut, then some sort of beef soup, then a greasy duck with the local mlinci, then a chocolate cake which was the only part of the feast I was allowed to skip as I cited medical and psychological reasons to avoiding sugar.

Now as I write this, I am on the couch recovering from the travel and the food.

It would be easy to shrug, say I don’t have anything more to share with you, and just tell you to enjoy your Christmas.

But the fact is this:

Since I was deprived of Internet in general and email in particular the whole day until just now, I actually found my brain bursting with bunches of ideas as I looked down onto the Alps.

I will share one of those ideas with you tomorrow — a way to grow my health newsletter via paid ads, while not paying nothin’ for the ads.

I don’t know whether this idea will work, but I plan to test it out starting right after the holidays. And you can try it too if you find out tomorrow what I have in mind.

For today, I will simply say that good things happen when you cut off the stupid Internet, including that social media channel known as your email inbox.

Try it. You might be inspired by the ideas that you invent in the absence of constant digital input. Plus you might enoy the holidays much more.

And if you find yourself bored and craving stimulation while you go into airplane mode with the Internet, then try reaching for a book.

I have one I wrote that I keep recommending. You can find it below. Whether or now you choose to get it, merry Christmas.

My book 10 Commandments of A-List Copywriters

3 most not-boring emails I wrote this year

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A few days ago, I sent out an email with the subject line, “A primer on worldbuilding.” I got a reply to that email from Howard Shaw of Chester Toys, a UK toy wholesaler that’s been in business for 60 years. Howard wrote:

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Don’t ask me why, but I just felt like replying….

‘​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​John Bejakovic ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​- never a boring email.

I always learn something or receive a nugget to ponder on.’

Anyways, all the best for the festive season and may 2024 be good to you.

===

I followed up with Howard to ask if I could use his comment in an email. ​​He said he would be offended if I didn’t. So here we are.

“Yah great for you and Howard,” I hear you saying. “Quite the love-in. But what about me? Where’s your ‘not boring’ email now? I don’t see anything particularly interesting or valuable so far today.”

True. It’s hard to write something not-boring every day.

​​I know, because I just spent the past one-and-a-half hours going through the 360+ emails I’ve written since the start of this year.

Most of my past 360+ emails I just scrolled through. I vaguely remembered writing them. They did their purpose at the time. But I certainly didn’t need to reread them.

However, some emails I did reread.

A few of those made me chuckle.

And a very few made me stop and think.

The emails that made me stop and think weren’t the ones that got the most replies and praise from readers.

​​They weren’t even the ones that made the most sales.

But looking back from today, at the end of the year, these top emails were somehow most interesting to me, as ideas that I should remember or practice, or because they sparked a change in how I how do marketing or how I write.

Over the course of the entire past year, I noted down 14 such top emails.

I then narrowed them down even more to the most not-boring 3, using myself as a sounding board.

In case you are looking for some not-boring emails, you can find them below. Don’t read any of them. Or read just one. Or read all three if you have got the time and stamina.

And like Howard says, all the best for the festive season to you.

How to become in-demand in your niche even if you have no contacts, portfolio, or good sense

Why the bathroom is a great place to negotiate

10 lessons from the ClientRaker promo

The business of selling “feeling good”

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This morning before heading out for coffee, I thumbed through the pages of my Kindle and read a passage of Dan Kennedy’s No B.S. Marketing to the Affluent.

​​Dan was talking about those colorful patterned dress shirts, the ones with a second colorful print on the inside of the cuff. And he said:

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The shirts are very popular in the Southwest with the rodeo crowd, rich oil men — one of whom has “collected 130 different designs” and spent so much money, the 2014 “collection” includes a design named after that customer, and quite a few GKIC members. The shirts go for $225.00 to over $500.00, and are sold direct, in catalogs, at Nieman Marcus, Saks Fifth Avenue, Nordstrom, high-end country western shops, and in several Las Vegas stores.

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“I wanda,” I said to myself as I raised my nose in the air, “I wanda if this brand of shirts is the one that Parris Lampropoulos buys.”

As you might remember if you were reading my emails back this past May, I went to a copywriting conference. Multimillionaire A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos was the star there.

The first night, Parris worked the room. As he did, he kept showing off his colorful, patterned shirt. “It’s a Robert Graham,” Parris would say to anyone who expressed interest. “I put his kids through college.”

I brought my nose back down to the pages of Marketing to the Affluent. Sure enough, Dan Kennedy was talking about Robert Graham shirts. And he had this to say:

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The brand’s owner, Robert Stock, calls customers “connoisseurs.” He says he is in the business of selling “feeling good” — getting favorably noticed, getting compliments, getting bragging rights.

===

My point is that old chestnut, that you are not in the business that you think you are in. At least, that is, if you want people bragging about how much money they spent on a collection of your stuff, instead of treating your offer like a commodity or at best a necessary occasional expense.

That’s all I got for you today. Except for an encouragement to read No B.S. Marketing to the Affluent if you haven’t done so.

It’s a valuable book, and I wish I had read it earlier.

If you wish to read it now, here’s where you can get it:

No B.S Marketing for the Affluent