People will pay to see someone shut your mouth

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Back when I was sexually illiterate — and by that I mean, back when it took me a minimum of two months of “hanging out” to maybe take a girl to bed — well, back then, I knew a guy named James.

James and I spent enough time together that I began to notice an uncomfortable thing he always did.

In any group of people, assuming there were any girls around, James always made some offhand sexual comment. Perhaps a fragment of a bizarre story that happened to him between the sheets. Or how he didn’t have a lot of time to cheat on his girlfriend before she came back from vacation. Or just about some impressive breasts that were passing by.

Like I said, I always found these comments uncomfortable. Tacky. Unnecessary. Why would James say these things?

Well, I now know. But this isn’t a pickup newsletter. Instead, it’s a marketing newsletter, so let’s talk marketing.

Specifically, personal branding.

Yesterday, I watched an eye-opening video on YouTube. It’s called Villains in Wrestling: The Art of Making People Hate You.

The video is great. Fun. Full of detail and story.

And it tells you the exact steps these TV entertainers take to become hated. And course, why they do it. In the words of Gorgeous George, the first TV wrestling heel and somebody who influenced Muhammad Ali, James Brown, and Bob Dylan:

“People will pay to see someone shut your mouth. So keep on bragging, keep on sassing, and always be outrageous.”

Gorgeous George was a star on par with the biggest entertainers of his era, including Bob Hope and Lucille Ball. He was paid obscene amounts of money, and he single-handedly made television into the entertainment medium it is today.

And that’s the connection to my story with James above. James had a pretty girlfriend, and from what I saw, plenty of quick success with random other girls on the side.

Fact is, there are proven ways to take girls to bed quickly, which have nothing to do with making more money or having six-pack abs.

Likewise, there are proven ways to grow a personal brand people will pay for, which have nothing to do with giving away more value or being helpful and friendly.

Maybe these ways make you uncomfortable. Maybe you’re all about expanding your comfort zone… but not if it means being hated or being tacky.

Your choice. But the knowledge is out there. And, speaking personally, that YouTube video on wrestling villains is worth a watch.

One last point:

I write a daily email newsletter. But it’s exclusive and therefore it’s not for you. For everybody else, the link to sign up is here.

How I increased my explosion rate +infinity% with the “Censorship Catalyst”

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Over the past two days, I got on my white lab coat, protective goggles, and elbow-high rubber gloves and ran a little experiment.

I wanted to see which mix of persuasive elements could create the most explosive reaction.

Except, I really have no scientific training. And so my experiment was poorly designed and very possibly dangerous. It went like this:

I sent out two emails with a link promoting the same book on Amazon.

But the link was not an affiliate link, so sales were not tracked.

To make things worse, the emails went out on two consecutive days, to my entire list, instead of at the same time, to different segments of my list.

​​Maybe the first day’s emails would eat up all the easy sales. Or maybe the second day’s emails would seem to sell all the people who were won over by the first email, but just didn’t buy immediately.

But let’s ignore all that for just a sec. And let me tell you my dramatic results.

Again, while I don’t have actual sales numbers for these emails, I do have personal replies people sent me. Among the replies to the first email, only one referenced the book I was promoting:

“I definitely didn’t buy it and I’m not excited to read it at all”

In case you missed it, the key words seem to be, “I definitely didn’t buy it.” For whatever reason, there seemed to be zero explosive reaction to my first email.

“What could be missing?” I asked myself as I paced up and down my lab late into the night.

Fortunately, just as I was about to give up and admit defeat, my lab mouse, Gulliver, who is allowed to run free around the lab after 9pm, knocked a book off the lab’s three-foot “Persuasive Classics” bookshelf.

The book fell off the shelf, hit me on the head, and landed right at my feet. I picked it up. It was opened to just the following passage:

“This raises the worrisome possibility that especially clever individuals holding a weak or unpopular position can get us to agree with that position by arranging to have their message restricted. The irony is that for such people — authors of daily email newsletters for example — the most effective strategy may not be to publicize their unpopular views, but to get those views officially censored and then to publicize their censorship.”

I stared at the page for a few moments. “Too bad,” I said. “I had hoped I would at least get a good idea when this book hit me on the head. But I got nothing. Maybe next time.”

Suddenly I heard Gulliver squeaking up on the shelf. He was gesticulating wildly and trying to tell me something in his mouse-like way.

A light bulb went off in my head. I knew what was missing!

I ran to my work desk, and furiously wrote up a second email, featuring the missing catalyst – the fact that the book I was promoting was restricted from the Amazon affiliate program.

Result?

A +infinity% increase in explosive power! ​​That is to say, I got three (3) people writing in to tell me they bought the book.

​​Look, I know three is not a lot. But who knows how many bought the book and didn’t write in to tell me so? Probably millions. In any case 3/0 is still technically infinity, and infinity sounds way better than saying I made three sales.

But maybe you dismiss these findings, or the validity of my experiment.

If so, that’s your loss.

Because there are other hungry marketers on my list who will take this info and use it to create sales explosions.

Many of them probably have that same classic of persuasion sitting up on their bookshelves. And they can just open it up to chapter 7 to find out the specific conditions in which the above persuasive catalyst works best, and which extra catalysts make it even more powerful.

And others hungry marketers on my list, who don’t have this book yet, will be sure to click below and get a copy of their own.

As for you you? Well, if you don’t click on the link below, then write in and let me know what you decide to do.

https://bejakovic.com/censorship

Excluded by Amazon: The book that’s too powerful to promote

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Yesterday, as I finished up my email promoting Derren Brown’s book Tricks of the Mind, I rubbed my hands together and started a reverie:

I imagined myself sitting in the shade, under a tiny palm tree, by a tiny beach, sipping a very tiny beer, and eating a very, very tiny steak.

After all, I was planning to put in an Amazon affiliate link at the end of yesterday’s email.

Depending on how many people actually took me up on my recommendation to get Brown’s quality, value-packed book, I might make $0.14 in affiliate commissions… or maybe $0.22… or who knows, if I was really persuasive… even $0.47!

That won’t buy a proper vacation even in a reverie, but a tiny vacation? Sure.

But then this tiny reverie was rudely popped. As I clicked to get the affiliate link, Amazon told me off:

“This product is one of the Amazon Associates Program Excluded Products. We do not support direct linking to this product. Please direct customers to another product or the category for this product instead.”

Excluded? Another Product? After I’d written the email???

I decided to invest a few minutes into threatening and cursing my laptop. That produced no result. So I looked around, made sure nobody had seen me, and pulled myself together.

I dug into why some products are excluded from the Amazon affiliate program. It turns out there are only three reasons why:

1. It’s alcohol

2. It’s an external promotional page linked to by an Amazon property

3. The third-party seller requested that the product be excluded

Brown’s book, by being a book, and by being on Amazon and not an external page, must fall into the third category.

In other words, like I wrote yesterday, maybe the information in this book really is too powerful.

Maybe Brown himself wants to keep it hush-hush. Maybe he only wants a select few, those who are cool enough, smart enough, mature enough, to read this book.

Maybe he wants to keep this book from appearing on a bunch of SEO-optimized top 10 lists and Medium filler articles and “most underrated” email newsletters.

So let’s see if that added information makes the book more attractive to you.

Whether you click the link below or don’t, I’m eating boiled chicken breast either way. I mean, I’m not getting paid anything by Amazon if you buy this book, and even if I were, it wouldn’t buy me steak tonight.

Before you go, if you want to hear more from me about excluded, possibly too powerful, insider information, then sign up for my email newsletter. And now, here’s the link to Brown’s book:

https://bejakovic.com/tricks

The destructive power of analogy

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Today I’d like to start by sharing an inspirational quote:

“If you feel you’re under-motivated, consider this: the word ‘motivation’ is used only by people who say they don’t have it. People who are ‘motivated’ rarely use such a term to describe themselves. They just get on with the task at hand. ‘Lack of motivation’ is an excuse: it’s giving a name to not just getting the job done.”

I read that in Derren Brown’s book, Tricks of the Mind. Brown seems like somebody I might have become in another life, had I only craved attention instead of shying away from it. And so when I read Brown’s quote, I nodded along and said, “Hmm that’s interesting. Maybe that’s even profound. Hey maybe there’s hope for me!”

Well, it wasn’t really me saying that. It was the little angel who usually sits upon my right shoulder.

“Psst, you there,” said the little devil who usually sits upon my left shoulder. “You wanna go smoke some cigars and drink some hooch? Or do you wanna hear why that D. Brown quote is bunk?”

“Err no,” I said. “This quote is inspiring. Please don’t ruin it for me. I’d like to believe it. Plus it makes sense. After all, if motivated people don’t know the feeling of being motivated, clearly it’s not a real thing.”

“Well let me ask you this,” said the little devil. “Do you know any 9-year-old kids?”

“No.”

“Well pretend like you do. Or just think back to when you were 9. Do you ever remember waking up in the morning after a blessed 10 hours of deep sleep… jumping out of bed… and with a stretch and a big smile on your face, saying, ‘Boy I feel so healthy today!'”

“Oh no…”

“Yeah, that’s right. Kids don’t talk like that, at least not the vast majority, the ones who have been perfectly healthy their whole life. But does that mean that there is no such thing as health? That you can’t be in good health or in bad health? Or by extension, that there’s no such thing as motivation and lack of m—”

“Get thee behind me Satan!” I yelled. But my mood was already spoiled and the quote above was ruined for me.

Maybe I managed to ruin it for you as well. If so, it was all for a good cause. I just wanted to illustrate the destructive power of analogy.

Fact is, Brown might really be right. There might not be any such thing as motivation.

But the fact he tried to prove it in a specific way (“motivated people never use the word”) was easy to spoil with my analogy to kids and health. And maybe, just maybe, your brain made the same leap after that which my brain did.

“Well, health is real… and if health and motivation are alike in this one way… then motivation must be real.”

​​But that’s not proven anywhere.

Anyways, now I’m getting into ugly logic which is really not what persuasion or this email are about.

I just want to point out that, if you want to persuade somebody of something, or if you want to dissuade somebody of something, then the most subtle and often the most persuasive thing you can do is to take two pushpins and a piece of string.

​​Stick one pushpin into an apple. Stick the other into an orange. Tie the string between the pushpins. Make it tight.

And then hold up your creation to the world and say, “Draw your own conclusions! But to me, these two look fundamentally the same! Just look at the string that connects them!”

Anyways, D. Brown does not talk much about analogies in his Tricks of the Mind. That’s his only omission. Because this book really has everything you need to persuade and influence — and from somebody who is both a serious student and a serious practitioner of all this voodoo.

In fact, the last time I mentioned this book in one of my emails, a successful but low-key marketer wrote in to tell me:

John!

Maybe you didn’t get the memo! You can’t tell people about Derren Brown’s “Tricks of the Mind”.

It’s against the rules.

As a friend of mine said, “That’s too much in one book. Don’t give the chimps tools.”

LOL

Well, maybe my mysterious reader is right. So don’t buy a copy of Derren Brown’s book. But if you do want occasional chimp-safe tools from that book, or from other valuable persuasion and influence sources, then you might like my daily newsletter.

I was doing “massive action” all wrong

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I just spent an hour sending out about a dozen emails to random people on random topics.

Some of them were personal.

Some were to connect those who might get value out of knowing each other.

Some had to do with my own little publishing business, of which you are reading the marketing right now.

The total time to send all those emails was under an hour. The total work, in terms of effort and brainpower, was nothing.

I don’t know what’s gonna come out of all those emails.

But I bet that out of those 12 emails, at least one big and positive thing will emerge that’s not anywhere near to the surface today. Perhaps it will be some totally new and fantastical beast, with bat wings, a cat tail, and maybe a donkey head… ready to entertain me, or make me some money, or maybe open up doors I don’t even know exist right now.

All this brought to mind something I overheard once during the Q&A part of a Dan Kennedy seminar. Somebody in the audience mentioned the “principle of massive action.”

I’ve known about “massive action” for a long while.

In fact, at different times in my life, I’ve been a devotee to the idea. But I always took it to mean something in a kind of Grant Cardonish sense – work harder than you’re working now, 10x harder, and quit complaining.

But this person in Dan Kennedy’s audience gave a different meaning to massive action. One that seems to exist within the Dan Kennedy galaxy.

Yes, “massive action” still involves taking action, and maybe even doing work.

But the key thing, according to what I read from Dan Kennedy, is to take action in a bunch of different dimensions.

Think up 12 different ways to solve a problem. And get going on all of them, all at once.

“Err Bejako,” I hear you say, “are you telling me to grind 12 times harder? How is this an improvement over Grant Cardone’s 10x fluff?”

Nope. Grinding is not required.

Of course, some of those 12 possible solutions might be hard to move forward.

But some may be easy.

Some may require you to do real work. Many won’t.

Some might require sitting and thinking, or writing and editing. Others might just require a quick email to someone you know.

You never know which one approach will end up being the one to solve your problem. And if my experience is any guide, it usually won’t be the most difficult and time-consuming one, the one that requires Grant Cardonish grinding. Plus, there’s seems to be some multiplicative magic when you take different approaches to solve a problem, beyond simple addition.

Anyways, I’m not sure if this helps you in any way.

But if you want more ideas like this, ideas I’ve pilfered from people like Dan Kennedy, applied, and benefited from, then sign up for my daily email newsletter.

Use the Force to avoid copy that’s too long

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A long, long time ago, in a galaxy that’s pretty much the one we live in, I was wasting time doing “research” (ie. not writing when I should have been). But at least I discovered the following curious fact:

George Lucas’s early drafts for the Star Wars script talked about “the Force of Others.”

These early drafts gave detailed explanations of what the Force of Others was, how it tied into a “Kyber crystal,” and how there was a “Bogan” side and an “Ashla” side of it.

Following his better instincts, Lucas stripped out all the explaining in the final draft. He got rid of the crystal and the Bogan nonsense, and dropped “the Others” and simply called it “the Force.” Star Wars went on to become a pretty, pretty big hit.

There’s a copywriting lesson here. But first, here’s another illustration:

Back in 1982, Darryl Hall was writing the prototype of a song called Maneater. He was stumbling on the last line of the chorus. “Oh here she comes… She’s a maneater and a …”

Hall can’t remember the original final line, because his girlfriend told him to “drop that shit at the end.” So he did. Maneater went to the top of the charts ​and stayed there longer than any other Hall & Oates song. Hall said that cutting down the last line made all the difference.

Conventional direct response wisdom says that longer copy outperforms shorter copy. It’s been proven over and over in many tests.

Copywriter Victor Schwab, who wrote How to Write a Good Advertisement, definitely supported the use of longer copy. But Schwab also wrote the following:

“Some ads don’t need much factual under-pinning… The copy about some products can soar successfully — without ‘coming a cropper.’ An abundance of factual material merely inhibits its flight. If too explicit about the “why” and “hows,” such copy pulls the reader’s imagination up short.” ​​

I can’t give you a recipe for when you should take out the “whys” and “hows” of your copy. I think it’s a matter of having a good feel for your market and your product, and knowing what they need to hear — and what not — in order to make the sale.

In other words, trust your intuition. Or use the Force. The Bogan Force. Of Others. And stop yourself if you say too much.

I should have stopped there. But I have one final thing to say. I write a daily email newsletter. If you’d like to get my emails, much like what you just read, you can sign up here.

Ben Settle’s secret three-act content strategy revealed

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A few days ago, I sent out an email with the subject line:

“Ben Settle emergency emails in support of Copy Riddles?”

That email officially had the highest open rate of all my emails over the past 10 days. I don’t know if that was because of the subject line. But for my own reasons, I will run with it and pander to your apparent tastes, by telling you a three-act Ben Settle story:

Back in 2016, Ben released a tiny Kindle book titled, Persuasion Secrets of the World’s Most Charismatic & Influential Villains.

The villains book turned into a sleeper hit.

As I write this, the book has 286 Amazon reviews and an Amazon ranking of 42,849. From what I know of Amazon publishing, that means the book continues to sell 4-5 copies every day, six years after its publication.

I reckon the villains book didn’t make Ben a tremendous pile of cash, not directly, not compared to other parts of his business.

But it almost certainly got him a large and constant new source of highly qualified leads. And it certainly gave him positioning and exposure in the direct response industry.

For a while, everyone associated Ben with the villains concept. It truly made him unique. And this probably led many more highly qualified leads trudging towards his hut, banging on his door, and demanding to be sold something.

So what did Ben do next? Perhaps you know act two. In 2018, he released Persuasion Villains, volume II.

Act three came in 2019. That’s when Ben released Persuasion Villains, volume III.

Which brings us to the present day and a tweet I came across a few days ago.

The tweet was written by one Matt Koval, who was apparently a big face at YouTube for over 10 years. Koval was the one whipping those early and confused YouTubers into the all-consuming media machine that YouTube has become.

Anways, Koval was tweeting in response to some YouTube influencer’s new video, and he wrote:

“One of the earliest pieces of content strategy advice we used to give at @YouTube was to try and turn your viral hit into a whole series – and it’s great to see @RyanTrahan do just that. It’s a TON of work, but no doubt a huge boost to his channel.”

But really, what is Koval’s “series” idea more than the standard DR practice of testing out different sales appeals in your ads? And then doubling down on the winners, for as long as they continue to pay for themselves?

As far as I know, Ben isn’t releasing any more villains books. This probably means he has milked this franchise to the point where putting out a new villains book isn’t worth the opportunity cost.

But maybe you’ve had a hit idea that you haven’t milked dry yet. Whether in your YouTube videos, Kindle books, or email subject lines. So rather than trying to be creative and have an all-new hit, turn your proven hit into a series.

In other news:

As I write this, I only have one Kindle book out there, my 10 Commandments book.

The 10 Commandments book hasn’t been as much of a success as Ben’s original villains book. But it has sold a lot of copies, and it continues to make sales. More importantly, it continues to drive highly qualified prospects to my email list.

And who knows? Maybe I will take my own advice.

Maybe I will lumber up the mountain, get a few more stone tablets of copywriting commandments, and write a second installment in this series.

Meanwhile, if you still haven’t read volume I, here’s where you can get your very own copy:

https://bejakovic.com/10commandments

The heavy cost of heavy emailing

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From last Wednesday to last Sunday, I sent out 11 emails to promote the most recent run of my Copy Riddles program. Five of those promo emails came on just the last day.

Here’s some sobering feedback I got about that from copywriter Dave Montore, who signed up for both Copy Riddles and the Inner Ring coaching:

Thanks for the warm welcome, and thanks for sending more emails than usual for this one.

I’d have missed sign up due to the holiday weekend if I hadn’t noticed three emails from you in one day yesterday.

Good lesson for anyone who thinks they’re “bothering” their list.

Dave replies to my emails fairly often. He’s actually bought some of my other offers in the past. And yet, like he writes above, he might have missed this most recent offer had I emailed less, particularly the last day.

“Yeah,” you might say, “but at what cost did you buy this one great case study? How did the rest of your list tolerate all that heavy emailing? I bet many of them were piii—”

Well, before you go there, let me admit those five emails I sent out the last day did get a total of 5 unsubscribes. That’s about 0.4% of my list. Over the entire 11-email promo campaign, I had a total of 10 unsubscribes. That’s actually less than my long-term average.

And in spite of kicking off this campaign with a tongue-in-cheek email, inviting the wrong kind of readers to send me their hate mail and mp3s of their trollish grunting, I got fewer than one such response.

​​That’s to say, nobody, not one person, wrote in to tell me how I’m selling too hard or how I’m sending too many emails or how I should check out Andre Chaperon or the Hubspot website for ideas about how to really do email right.

On the other hand, I did get dozens of fun, smart, or respectful replies from people who enjoyed my emails, or had questions about the offer, or who actually took me up on my offer and wrote me with a certain amount of pride to tell me so.

Still you might say, nothing new here. Email done right makes sales. The worst that happens is that people who aren’t a good fit end up unsubscribing.

Yes, there is nothing new here. You got me there.

The only reason I am telling you this is because, ever since I’ve started offering my Email Marketing Audit back in May, the first conclusion I’ve made with all the clients who took me up on the Audit has been:

Email more.

Many business owners email once a week. They make some sales with that one email. And then they start to think, gee, how can I do better? Are there some subject line tricks or some deliverability hacks for improving the results from this one email?

My argument is always:

If you are making some sales with one email a week, try sending two. You might not double the money you make. But I’m pretty sure you will make more than you make now, and I’m 100% sure will make more long-term than if you focus on tiny tweaks to that one email.

So that’s free advice.

Of course, there is more to email marketing, done right, than simply creating heavy email showers.

But that kind of advice and guidance and advice is something I charge for.

So if you are a business owner, and you have an email list, and you want me to do an Email Marketing Audit of your email funnels and copy, you can get started here:

https://bejakovic.com/audit

How to create blacker-than-black urgency without a deadline

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This morning, I closed down the Copy Riddles cart and ended the promotion for this run. It’s now time for all the people who signed up to see how I deliver on the promises I’ve made.

Like I wrote in my last promo email for Copy Riddles, 76.7% of those people — well, 76.7% of my total sales — all rolled in the last day. I had more coming in after I wrote that email, so the final number for last-day sales was even higher.

That’s because, like I wrote in that email, deadlines are black magic. In the words of Nigel Tufnel of Spinal Tap:

“It’s so black. Like how much more black could this be? And the answer is… none. None more black.”

Well, for Nigel’s benefit and maybe yours, I want to tell you that there is a form of persuasion wizardry that might be blacker than black. Let me quickly get my cloak and peak hat on, and tell you what I have in mind.

Over the past few days, while preparing to write my second Most Valuable Postcard, I started reading Rich Schefren’s 12 Month Marketing Blueprint.

I’m a big fan of Rich and just about everything I’ve seen him do. But I have to say the name of this particular offer is misleading. It’s hardly a blueprint. Really, it’s a fully built, furnished condo with pictures of Rich’s family inside.

In other words, what you get inside the “Blueprint” is 310 pages of actual emails, slides, sales letters, and free reports that Rich created back in 2006 and 2007 and sent out to his list and to his JV partners.

If you wanna reverse engineer a blueprint out of this, that’s gonna be on you. You have to do it yourself.

​​But it might be a worthwhile exercise. Because here’s the result of all these hundreds of pages of marketing, from the front page of the Blueprint:

Over 830,000 downloads
Over 1,895 one-way links
$960,000 in the first 2 hours and 15 minutes
From unkown – to known – to well known. From 20 clients to 2,070 clients. From 2 employees to 12.
How I Got Attention and Leveraged it to 7.4 Million a Year company.

I won’t spell out the many smart strategies that Rich uses in this 310-page collection of marketing. (A few of the most interesting ones are going to people who are subscribed to receive my Most Valuable Postcard later this month.)

What I will reveal to you is that blacker-than-black wizardry I mentioned above.

Here it is, right at the top of Rich’s sales page for his consulting offer — the offer that sold out in 2 hours and 15 minutes, and generated close to a million dollars:

“Warning: 32,543 want to know more about my coaching. 4,507 are on a waiting list to get early access (to this page) and 4,284 marketers registered for a teleseminar to get the details of this program. In addition, my joint venture partners will be sending out roughly 1,300,000 emails directing their subscribers to this offer. Consequently, there are only 1000 of 1000 seats available. Many of them are being taken as you read this. Scroll down to secure your spot!”

So there you go. that’s how you create blacker-than-black magic, without a deadline. Right there, in that salad of numbers.

What?

​​You want a blueprint?

A salad is not enough?
​​
Pff… fine.

​​Here’s the actual formula, phrased the way Rich likes to phrase it:

Social proof + Scarcity = Urgency

And now, on to unrelated promotional materials:

If you are interested in my Most Valuable Postcard offer, I have an update for you.

I initially only opened this offer to 20 people, when I first made it available, back in May. All 20 of those 20 are still subscribed to get the postcard.

Later this month, I will reopen my Most Valuable Postcard for the first time, to 20 new subscribers. I’ll limit it again because I’m making some changes to the offer and I want to control how that will go.

My joint venture partners will be sending out roughly 0,000,000 emails directing their subscribers to this offer.

But this email is going out to over 1,300 people who read my daily emails.

And almost 140 of these readers have already expressed interest in signing up for the Most Valuable Postcard. They have joined the waiting list, so they can be the first to get notified and the first to have a chance to sign up when I reopen the Most Valuable Postcard.

In case you’re interested in blacker-than-black persuasion magic, and you’d like to have the best chance to sign up to my Most Valuable Postcard when it reopens, you’ll have to be on my email list first. Here’s where to sign up.

A push-button storytelling trick for a stronger second draft

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Let me try to charm you with a pretty exciting story I witnessed a few days ago:

I was sitting on a stool at a seafood restaurant at the main Barcelona market, waiting for my order of oysters and fried squid. Suddenly, I saw it. A lobster, on a bed of ice, on top of a seafood display shelf in front of me. But the little guy was still alive!

The lobster started walking backwards, off the plate, onto the glass counter. The nearest restaurant patrons moved away. One tried to grab the lobster from behind. But the lobster turned around, and the brave patron backed off. For a moment, it looked like a panic might start.

But then the owner of the restaurant, a middle-aged woman with a pixie cut and a big smile on her face, came, confidently picked up the lobster, and put him back on the plate of ice, pushing the poor bastard down to keep him from walking off again. The end.

Pretty charming story, right? Pretty… pretty… charming.

But can we inject some electricity into this pretty charming story? Can we force it to come alive, like Frankenstein’s monster? Well, let’s push the button and see:

I was balancing on a stool at a seafood restaurant at the main Barcelona market, counting down the seconds for my order of oysters and fried squid. Suddenly, my eyes locked in on it. A lobster, on a bed of ice, on top of a seafood display shelf in front of me. But the little guy still twitched with life!

The lobster scrambled backwards, off the plate, onto the glass counter. The nearest restaurant patrons fell out of their seats. One tried to coral the lobster from behind. But then the lobster spun around, and the brave patron backed off, arms up. For a moment, it felt like the place might erupt in a panic.

But then the owner of the restaurant, a middle-aged woman with a pixie cut and a big smile on her face, swept in, confidently grabbed the lobster, and plopped him back on the plate of ice, crunching the poor bastard down to keep him from escaping again. The end.

Better, no? I mean, maybe a little ham-handed, maybe a little freshman-writing-class-y, but the idea is sound. And the idea is this, from a quick story once whispered by Hollywood screenwriter Larry Ferguson:

“There was a girl who came to me with her first screenplay. It was a good first shot. I gave her some advice. I told her, ‘I want you to go home and take a yellow Marks-A-Lot and highlight every verb in this 120-page screenplay, and then I want you to read them out loud and ask yourself, Can I find a stronger verb.'”

So there you go. If your current draft is a good first shot, highlight your verbs. Sweat and struggle a bit until you hit upon stronger verbs. And you might discover you’ve created something sexy, something truly alive.

But you know what?

Stronger verbs, and stronger words in general, are just one good way to edit your copy to make it more biting and bothersome.

There are at least six other editing techniques, which I’ve seen A-list copywriters using regularly, either consciously or unconsciously. A few of these techniques are much more subtle, and maybe even more effective, than just reaching for stronger words.

If you’d like to own all of these techniques, you can find them in Round 20 of Copy Riddles. Round 20 is all about taking that pretty, pretty good copy you’ve written and turning it into something that wounds people with intrigue and curiosity, even if they can’t quite pinpoint why.

And Round 20 isn’t just a bunch of boring how-to. Instead, just like the rest of Copy Riddles, it forces you to practice each technique yourself, and compare your results to the results that A-list copywriters got.

After all, the only thing better than a demonstration you can see… is a demonstration you can try out — I mean, play with, fondle, and feel — yourself.

Enrollment for Copy Riddles closes later tonight, at 12 midnight PST. That’s less than 12 hours away. To sign up while there’s still time:

https://bejakovic.com/cr