Parris Lampropoulos

Answers to life, the universe, and all direct response marketing questions

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If you’re looking for the answer to life, the universe, and all direct response marketing questions, then I have a computer you should talk to.

No, I mean it.

A real computer. It’s called Delphi. You tell it something. And using some computer magic plus an ever-updating database of previous moral judgments, Delphi tells you if your prompt is ethical or not… good or bad… moral or immoral.

I wanted to see if it worked at all. So I fed it a few prompts. And here’s what it spat back:

“Get rich” — it’s good

“Get rich slowly” — it’s okay

“Get rich quick” — it’s wrong

That’s encouraging. Maybe this Delphi really does know something.

Because the responses above are pretty much how a large part of the population feels about money.

They’d like to have more of it, maybe even much more. But they are not very enthusiastic about grinding it out over the years and decades they imagine it would really take. And yet, they have moral hangups about getting there quick — it must mean doing something sneaky or bad.

Ok, Delphi. Let’s see how you do with a few direct response classics. Here are a few promises made by Gene Schwartz, Chris Haddad, and Gary Halbert:

“Master Transcendental Meditation In A Single Evening” — it’s unreasonable

“Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back, Literally At The Push Of A Button” — it’s immoral

“Lose Up To 20 Pounds In Two Weeks The Lazy Way” — it’s bad

Interesting. I wonder what Delphi’s layers of virtual neurons didn’t like about these promises. Let’s try a few full-blown DR headlines, from Parris Lampropoulos, John Carlton, and David Deutsch:

“Scientists Discover Solution to Sexual Problems Hidden in 1,500-Year-Old Himalayan Secret” — it’s good

“Amazing Secret Discovered By One-Legged Golfer Adds 50 Yards To Your Drives, Eliminates Hooks and Slices And Can Slash Up To 10 Strokes From Your Game Almost Overnight!” — it’s good

“What Every Wife Wishes Her Husband Knew About Estate Planning And The IRS Hopes You Never Find Out” — it’s good

Perhaps you can see inside Delphi’s mind and understand why the oracle liked these headlines.

I have my own theory. It’s something will be sharing with people who signed up for my Influential Emails training.

That offer is now closed — I shut it down earlier today, as I said I would.

But if you didn’t sign up for Influential Emails… and you want to know my thoughts on the above headlines, and how this can be used to make your emails better… well, then just stay put. I’m sure to use this technique in an email soon, and then it will probably be obvious to you.

But for today, since Influential Emails is closed, I have no offer to make to you. Well, none except absolute moral judgements on any question you might have… along with age-old wisdom about direct response headlines and body copy. You can find it in the hallowed issues of my daily email newsletters. Here’s the entrance to the temple.

New startling sensations and illusions eclipsing anything ever attempted in the world of copywriting

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Step right up, ladies and gentlemen, and behold the mighty A-list copywriters!

See how they persuade with the written word!

Marvel at their subtle tricks in these three bullets by Daring David Deutsch… Powerful Parris Lampropoulos… and Jesting Jim Rutz! Behold, ladies and gentlemen, behold:

* Cure your back pain. Inside on page 3. [David Deutsch]

* Study finds this herb works for three-quarters of men who take it. Page 16 [Parris Lampropoulos]

* Aging parents? A nursing home might be OK. [Jim Rutz]

Yes, boys and girls, friends and enemies! These A-list copywriters know secrets and mysteries that you do not! And now, for the low, low admission price of…

All right, that’s enough. Let me stop the circus barker act. And let me tell you the story behind the three deformed and monstrous bullets above.

The story is that yesterday I got a question from a feller named Nathan. Nathan signed up for my upcoming Influential Emails training. And he’s confused about how to plan out a welcome sequence.

How many emails to spend on telling the brand story? How many about benefits? When to handle objections? What order should the emails go in?

It’s a question I also used to ponder, many Octobers ago. But it’s not something I ponder any more, or that I’ll talk about inside Influential Emails. Because here’s what I told Nathan, and it might be valuable to you too:

Most people will not read all your emails. And even if they do read them all, they won’t remember them.

Does that sting? Bear with me for a second.

When we as copywriters or marketers put together a sequence of emails, we can trick ourselves into thinking it’s a sales letter. After all, that’s how it looks in a Google Doc, if you put one of your emails after another.

But that’s not how it looks to your prospects.

Your prospects might give one of your emails a thorough reading… skim a second one… skip a third. And all this separated by a day or more… and in between dealing with two dozen other emails in their inbox… plus all the other stuff that’s sucked away their attention in the meantime.

I’ve previously compared emails to sales bullets. The analogy applies here as well.

Because when you assume your prospects have followed your sequence faithfully… or that they will keep following it faithfully… your emails become armless and legless, like those hideous bullets above.

But free yourself of this wicked assumption, and behold the magic and the wonder that emerges. Each of your emails is forced to become fascinating and convincing, like these real, unamputed, A-list bullets:

* How a pickpocket can cure your back pain. Inside on page 3. [David Deutsch]

* What to take for an enlarged prostate if you’re not getting results from saw palmetto or pygeum. Study finds this herb works for three-quarters of men who take it. Page 16 [Parris Lampropoulos]

* Aging parents? A nursing home might be OK, but see four better options on page 89. [Jim Rutz]

But perhaps you’d like to know how to make each of your emails fascinating and convincing — the equivalent of the A-list bullets above. In that case, hold on a second. Let me put on my top hat and cape. And let me clamber back onto my soapbox.

Because, ladies and gentlemen, all my many mysteries and email secrets will be revealed. So step right up, and prepare to be shocked and amazed by my Influential Emails, the marvel of the copywriting world. Low, low admission price — a special offer, good only till this Sunday. Show’s inside, folks, right this way, the door to the tent is here:

https://influentialemails.com​​

My need is your opportunity

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I was originally planning on taking the idea in this email and packaging it up as a paid product, maybe a short video course.

I could use the money. But the idea is still too rough to sell.

Perhaps with your help I can polish it. And then sell it, for a fair price, which reflects its true worth. And maybe we can even split the profits.

So here’s what I’ve got so far:

1. Parris Lampropoulos fundraiser. A few years ago, A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos was raising money for his cousin’s cancer treatment. Back then, I wrote an email about why I finally broke down and bought the webinar series that Parris was offering. And one part of what made me do it was this:

People rush to a fire sale because they feel they must be getting a steal. Because they think they are taking advantage of somebody else’s time of need.

I’m not proud of it, but I realize that, somewhere not very deep down, there was an element of this in my motivation to seize this opportunity.

2. The Robert Collier kicking story. Collier once wrote about how his colleagues at the publishing company spent time each day kicking holes in the boxes of books they were selling. Because lightly damaged sets of books, advertised as such and sold at a discount, sold more easily and made more money than sets in perfect condition.

3. The continuing problems with the Green Valley supply chain. Not long ago, I wrote about the overstock at the Green Valley warehouse. It’s the second time it happened in under a year. Both times, they had to run a sale to get rid of the extra bottles of pills. This twice-in-a-year overstock was either extremely unlucky or transparently false.

So that’s what I’ve got so far.

You can see the common thread. If you wanna sell something, it’s often very powerful to run a sale and give a reason for the sale.

And not just any reason.

But a reason that allows your prospects to think they are taking advantage of your need. Just don’t be transparent about it, or you lose credibility.

I think this is a super valuable idea at its core. Everything tells me it can move mountains of stuff, if it’s only used wisely.

But how exactly? That’s where I’m stuck. I don’t have any good examples of this strategy being used consciously and yet credibly in today’s market.

So you got any ideas for me? How to apply this today? How can I take this “fire sale” insight, and wrap it up as a little course I can sell?

If you do, get on my email newsletter so we can stay in touch. And then write me and let me know your ideas. If I ever end up putting this product out with your help, I won’t just give you a free copy. I want to show my gratitude. So I’ll also give you a royalty, a share of the earnings as well.

How to get booked solid with paying clients without prospecting any harder or dropping your prices

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Today I have a copywriting tip for you, not a lead-gen tip. But if you are looking for a way to get more client work, then here’s an idea from a recent Ben Settle email:

If you want clients who love and rave about you, be punctual.

It truly separates the men from the boys.

It also will make what I teach in my “Email Client Horde” book that’s on sale today a lot more powerful — potentially ramping up the respect and gratitude clients have for you, wanting to keep you, and not wanting to hire anyone else.

I’ve seen (and experienced) it many times.

I suspect you can, too.

Ben’s email had the subject line, “A secret way of using an ordinary pocket watch to get booked solid with paying clients.”

It’s a standard bullet writing technique. You zoom in on the solution. And then you zoom in some more. So far in, that the reader starts to wonder, “A pocket watch? Why specifically a pocket watch? Gotta find out.”

The best copywriters out there, from Gary Bencivenga to Parris Lampropoulos and David Deutsch, all use this technique regularly. But there’s a problem:

You can’t use it all the time. Your readers get wise, and get burned out. “Oh, it’s the teaspoon trick.” “Not the air conditioner secret again.” “There he goes, trying to get me to read by zooming in on a hairbrush.”

So what can you do?

There’s a second clever thing A-list copywriters do in situations like this. It’s probably obvious because you can find it in the subject line of this very email.

But if it’s not fully obvious, or you want a few examples of how A-list copywriters use this trick to create bullets that seem to be truly impossible, then you can find that in lesson 8 of my bullets course.

​​Which you can’t join just yet… but which will be available soon. If you want to make sure you get in while it is available, sign up for my email newsletter, because that’s where I will first announce it.

#1 secret of wealth creation for marketers and copywriters

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Today, for the first time ever, I took a closer look at Parris Lampropoulos’s Copy Vault sales page.

Parris, who is an A-list copywriter, offered the Copy Vault training back in 2018. And back in 2018, when I decided I wanted in, I raced past the sales letter and went straight to the order page. Rabbit brain.

So today, while working on a project, I finally took a closer look. And right away, I saw something odd. The headline reads:

For the First and Last Time Ever,
Parris Lampropoulos Opens the Vault and Reveals His Top Wealth-Creation Secrets
for Copywriters and Marketers

Hmm. That sounded strangely familiar.

The bit calling out copywriters and marketers… the promised secrets of wealth-creation… and that “first and last time” thing…

Had I seen all of those somewhere before? Oh yeah. Of course:

Available on DVDs for the First and Only Time…
“Gary Bencivenga’s
7 Master Secrets
of Wealth Creation
for Marketers and Copywriters”

That’s the headline that Gary Bencivenga, an even more famous A-list copywriter, wrote for the sales letter for his farewell seminar, back in 2006.

Coincidence?

Hardly. Rather, it’s the #1 wealth-creation secret for any marketers or copywriters who are willing to listen. Here’s why.

I recently heard marketer Caleb O’Dowd talk about how he does research. Caleb said two things.

First, when you enter a market, you should look at your top 3-5 competitors. (Or I guess one is enough, if your competitor happens to be Gary Bencivenga.)

Caleb said there are reasons why those people are at the top. So reverse engineer their successful sales letters… figure out those reasons… and you too will know exactly what to say to prospects to get a response.

Very obvious, right?

Right. But still something that was eye-opening to me. Because while I’ve spent hundreds of hours of research on copywriting projects… very little of that time went to analyzing copy from the competition.

Silly me. That’s something I will change starting now.

And what about the second tip Caleb had about research?

Well, that’s in the video below.

​​The video is from the Q&A after-party of the recent Clayton Makepeace tribute. It features a bunch of A-list copywriters, including Gary Bencivenga and Parris Lampropoulos, answering questions.

​​I personally think it’s worth watching for Caleb’s answer alone. But perhaps you’re wondering if you really need another Obvious Adams tip on research.

In that case, let me repeat something I wrote a few weeks ago, also in connection to Caleb:

“Caleb said deep research is the kind of thing very few marketers are willing to engage in. But those who do inevitably wind up at the top of their market. They don’t just succeed, they have breakthroughs, and they make millions.”

By the way, Caleb isn’t the only one to put such a premium on research and understanding your audience.

Gary says the game is won or lost in research. He calls deep research the “launchpad of copywriting breakthroughs.”

And Parris says the #1 secret in copywriting — more than any technique or book — is to understand your audience.

In case that’s sufficient motivation for you to find out Caleb’s other research tip…

Well, let me interrupt for a second. And say that, if you are a copywriter or a marketer, and you’re after wealth-creation secrets, you might want to sign up to my email newsletter.

And now, if I’ve convinced you about the value of research, and you want to see what Caleb’s second tip is, here’s the video:

A copy riddle with a swipe file prize

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Here’s a copy riddle for you:

Gary Halbert called it the only reason that people buy from an ad, for the most part…

While Ben Settle said that copywriting is all about this one thing.

Parris Lampropoulos credits his success to it. And drilling this one thing is how he spends 80% of his time with his copy cubs.

David Deutsch said it’s the “key to the kingdom”…

And John Carlton believes it makes the difference between a sale made and a sale lost.

So my riddle for you is, what is this one thing?

I gave this riddle to people on my email newsletter. And the people who got it right got a prize.

The prize was a link to the best publicly available swipe file I have ever found. And no, it’s not swiped.co.

In my opinion, the swipe file I have in mind is about 100x better, based on the quality and quantity of ads you can find inside… many of which are only available today as bonuses to expensive copywriting and marketing courses.

Sometimes, I run little contests and challenges like this, as a way to keep my newsletter fun and profitable. If you’d like to try out my newsletter, both to see whether you like the content, and so you can participate in the next little riddle challenge, then click here and fill out the form.

You, your own copywriting secret weapon?

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Here are two flexible factoids, and a suggestion you might find valuable:

1. A-list copywriter Gary Halbert said curiosity is the most powerful human motivating force.

2. Another A-list copywriter, Parris Lampropoulos, keeps a “Didn’t know that!” file. This is where Parris puts new and interesting facts he comes across during research for copywriting projects.

​​But Parris has spent hundreds of hours doing research on dozens of big projects… so when he comes across something new and interesting to him, you can bet it will be new and interesting to his audience.

So I’d like to suggest you do something similar.

Invest $3 in a notebook… or invest two seconds to create a file on your computer desktop. Write “Hm, I didn’t know that, or, that’s interesting” across the top.

​​And you’re pretty much done. From then on, as you come across something that fits that heading, you just add it to your notebook or file.

The longer your list grows, the more interesting and valuable it will become, by process of elimination.

Eventually, you will have a list of things that stimulate curiosity for almost everyone in your audience. And if Gary H. is right, you will have the most powerful tool in motivating people to action.

​​In effect, you make your own curiosity and capacity to be surprised into your copywriting secret weapon.

I do this exact same thing, and it’s been valuable to me. In fact, it’s how I write these emails each day. Which brings me to my self-serving reason for telling you about this:

A reader named Glenn wrote in to challenge me on some sloppy self-promotion I committed recently.

Glenn pointed out that in the email I sent out announcing my bullets course… I didn’t feature a single Gary Halbert-style bullet.

Fair point.

My answer to this is that emails like the one you’re reading are basically the modern version of sales bullets. The only difference is you’re not restricted by space (like in a sales letter or print ad)… or by having only one shot to make the sale (like when paying for cold traffic).

Other than that, bullets and sales emails are the same.

​​You find some information that your audience might want. You condense it and sexy it up.

​​If it’s really cool and interesting information, you can choose to give it away in your copy… or if it’s meh information, then you might choose to tease it endlessly in your email or bullet, and hide the payoff in your product for sale.

In other words, if you can learn how to write sexy sales bullets… you will be a long way to being able to write emails people will want to read day after day. Particularly if you add in something new and interesting to tell your reader, which is what your “Hm, I didn’t know that” list is all about.

Anyways, that’s part of my pitch for joining my bullet writing course, which kicks off this Monday. If you’re interested in joining, then the first step is signing up for my email newsletter, which you can find here.

Cheapest way to get an A-list copywriting education (only good until Thursday)

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Say you’d like to get a bunch of A-list copywriters to sit around and share insights and advice with you. I’m talking the biggest names in the direct response industry… people like Gary Bencivenga and Parris Lampropoulos and David Deutsch. Copywriters who have sold hundreds of millions of dollars worth of stuff with just their magic, fascinating words.

How much would you be willing to pay for such an opportunity, if it lasted, say, an entire afternoon?

$5k?

Too much?

How about $1k?

Still too much?

Maybe only $500?

Well, I’ll tell you how to get it for free.

This Thursday at 1pm EST, a bunch of the most successful copywriters of all time are getting together in virtual space, somewhere in east Zoom. The occasion is the one-year anniversary of the death of Clayton Makepeace, himself a famous A-list copywriter, and a mentor to many of the people who will be speaking on this call.

Here are few things that might interest you about this event:

1. It will last for 3 hours.

2. So far, about a dozen A-list copywriters and other direct marketing veterans are confirmed to be participating.

3. I have no idea what these people people will talk about. But even if there are zero headline tips and even fewer magic sales letter closes being shared… I suspect the call will still be very valuable.

4. Since this is organized in Clayton’s honor, and based on the profile of the people who will join, I imagine it won’t just be a 3-hour-long tease-fest that’s designed to sell something else. But I could be wrong.

5. I don’t know if there will be any recordings of the call, and if there are, how they will be made available and to whom.

5. This event is free to attend, but you do gotta register.

So if an A-list education sounds good to you… and if free is a price you can afford to pay… then here’s where to go:

https://members.carlinecole.com/clayton

A simple 3-hour “trick” which 100% makes your bullets better

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Today is the last day of the bullets course I’ve been running. We will wrap it up with an important lesson. Let’s start with a bullet by David Deutsch:

“Restore night vision — with a berry. See page 76.”

Which berry? Here’s what it says of page 76 of the book David was selling:

Night Vision

* Eat blueberries when they’re in season. They can help restore night vision.

* You know the old joke about carrots being good for your eyes? Well you’ve never seen a rabbit wearing glasses. Eat two or three carrots a day (raw or cooked) and/or drink a glass of fresh carrot juice. It’s excellent for alleviating night blindness.

* Eat more watercress in salads and/or drink watercress tea.

David’s bullet is an example of the teaser mechanism I wrote about yesterday. But that’s not the point I want to make today.

Instead, look at all that other stuff in the source material.

Why did David choose to focus on the berry? Why didn’t he highlight the proven “Bugs Bunny cure” for night blindness instead? And why didn’t the bullet read,

“Restore night vision — with this delicious tea. See page 76.”

Who the hell knows. But I can take a guess. Let me set up my guess with two facts about two other expert copywriters. First, here’s Gary Bencivenga, writing in the royal “we”:

“When it comes to strong copy, we’ve seen again and again that the most persuasive ads arise from thorough research. We’ve established this general rule — accumulate seven times more information about the product than we can use.”

Second, there’s Parris Lampropoulos. I heard him say in an interview how he also follows Gary’s 7x research rule above. But from what I understand, Parris takes it one step further.

Parris will also write 7x the bullets he can use in his copy. This means that for a magalog with a 100 bullets, Parris will write up to 700 bullets.

So now we get back to those night-vision blueberries.

It’s very possible that David did write up bullet with a “Bugs Bunny cure,” or something like it. But when comparing it with the berry mechanism, he simply thought the berry sounded better.

The fact is, in any decent book or course or other info product, there will be a bunch of problems that are addressed… a bunch of solutions offered… and a bunch of factoids you can twist and highlight about each of these solutions. Each of those can make a new bullet.

You don’t really know which combination will sound the best until you try it out. And you also don’t know which one will work the best once you have it in the actual promo, surrounded by other bullets. Which leads to today’s bullet lesson:

Lesson 11: “Write many more bullets than you need.”

How many more?

That’s up to you. David and Gary and Parris wrote copy where millions of dollars were on the line. In that case, it makes sense they put in 7x extra work.

But what if you’re just starting out? Well, it might make sense even in that case. Here’s a quote by another master of bullets, Gene Schwartz:

“This is what makes success. There’s nothing else in the world that makes success as much as this. I will take the best copywriter in the world who is sloppy and careless, and match him against a good copy cub, and two out of three times, the sloppiness of the great person will be beaten by the carefulness of the other person. […] The person who is the best prepared and the most knowledgeable makes the most money. It’s so simple!”

I can tell you this personal tidbit:

For my lesson yesterday on teaser mechanisms, I wanted to feature three examples. And so I took my own advice, and I dug up 21 examples of teaser bullets, and the source material behind each of them. It took me about three hours of work to do all the research and analysis.

So was it worth it?

I think so. It’s how I could see the (now obvious) lessons I found yesterday.

But like I said, today’s is the end of this bullets course.

This doesn’t mean there are no more bullets lessons out there… or that I’ve stopped researching and writing them up. Quite the opposite.

The fact is, I want to create a new version of this course, which actually gets you practicing these lessons instead of just reading what I write. This new course won’t be free and it might be expensive… well, at least when you compare it to free.

Anyways, I’ll write up an offer page for this in a few days. And I’ll send it out in an email so you can see for yourself — assuming you’ve been eating your carrots — whether it’s something you’re interested in or not.

And if you want to get that email when I send it out, you can subscribe here to my amazing email sending service.

A-list teaser bullets

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Here are three workhorse teaser bullets, written by three A-list copywriters:

“Best exercise to improve your potency. Just 3 or 4 minutes, twice a day. Page 150.”

“Put an end to cold feet — with an old skiers’ trick that makes one pair of socks feel like two. Page 86.”

“How to increase the power of the beneficial bacteria in your gut without yogurt or probiotic supplements. The secret is this delicious drink. Page 247.”

The first of these was written by Arthur Johnson… the second by David Deutsch… and the third by Parris Lampropoulos.

I tracked down the original source material from which these A-listers wrote these bullets. And thanks to this, I managed to extract three lessons, or rather three ingredients, that anybody, A-list or not, could use to write more powerful bullets.

What are these three ingredients?

That’s something I reserved for people who are signed up to my free bullets course, which is going on right now. For more information, and less teasing, go here:

https://bejakovic.com/bullets-signup/