What a day to fly

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“Oh what the f—”

I arrived to the airport today around 8:45am to be faced with a giant, hideous snake, made up of people and luggage, starting at the check-in counters, folding in on itself a dozen times, and finally stretching its tail some hundred yards into the depths of the terminal.

I immediately made my way for the “last call” line. Even that took almost 45 minutes before I finally made it to the check-in counter.

​​I handed my id to the woman behind the counter. ​​She wasn’t interested.

“I need proof of your booking,” she said.

“What?”

“I need to see proof that you’ve bought a ticket.”

“The proof’s there in the computer,” I said. I helpfully pointed to her computer monitor for her.

She flipped it around so I could see. It showed a booting-up window. It was frozen.

“The computers aren’t working,” she said. “I need proof that you’ve bought a ticket.”

Maybe you’ve heard. There was some giant IT crash all around the world today. America. Australia. Europe. Hospitals. Banks. Airlines.

I produced proof of booking in the end.

​​And in return, I got a flimsy piece of paper, written out by hand, with my name on it and the code for the flight. That was my boarding pass today.

I won’t go into the details of all my adventures today.

Suffice to say, the situation was a huge mess, everywhere, all at once.

As I stood there at the airport, in a crowd of thousands of people, all of us burdened with luggage, all confused, all indecisive and yet unhappy to stay where we were, I thought that this was a little sampler of what Porter Stansberry has been predicting for 15 years or more.

“End of America.” Total social collapse. A world in which things stop working, and we’re suddenly exposed and helpless.

I don’t know if Stansberry’s predictions will ever come true.

But I do know that predictions like that always get attention.

Fear works. So does greed, if you can tie it into the fear, and make a claim like copywriter Gary Halbert once did:

“How You Can Profit From The Coming Stock Market Crash And Financial Blood-Bath That Is Going To Be Caused By Cash-Rich Drug Dealers And Other Criminal Scum!”

The thing is, fear and greed can be good at getting buyers. But they might not be very good at getting repeat buyers, the buyers who actually build a direct response business.

There has to be something more.

And to find out what that something more is, today I’ll invite you to read an essay that has been ringing in my head for years.

This essay explains why the “End of America” sales letter was such a huge success, when hundreds of similar sales messages, all making the same predictions and claims, didn’t even come close.

And this analysis comes from a man who should know, because he got the sales numbers of all these hundreds of sales letters, and he got the copy to compare. Plus, he’s a master copywriter himself, who has coached and guided dozens of other master copywriters.

If you’re interested in copywriting, at all, then this essay is worth a read:

https://www.markford.net/2019/12/09/

Do you have a newsletter or FB group?

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A few days ago, I read how my buddy Kieran Drew bought another newsletter to absorb, like a growing metropolis absorbs a quaint village nearby.

The owner of the other newsletter decided to go pursue some other project. He wasn’t interested in running the newsletter any more.

So Kieran paid him per subscriber who stays on after 2 weeks. They did a kind of handoff, where the new subscribers were introduced to Kieran, and given many chances to unsubscribe, and at that point they were merged into Kieran’s list.

As far as I know, the experiment is still ongoing. It’s not clear yet whether Kieran has already made his money back or whether this buy can be considered a success. (In case you’re interested in hearing how this experiment ends, it’s worth getting on Kieran’s list at kierandrew.com.)

This made me wonder.

Do you have a newsletter, a Facebook group, or a Skool group?

Is it made up of an audience of coaches, business owners, or people interested in making money online?

And, in case this group or newsletter is not something you enjoy running and managing, have you thought of trading in the login username and password to the group, or the Excel export of newsletter contacts, for a neat stack of $100 bills?

If you find yourself a little intrigued or curious right now, write me and let’s talk.

I might be interested in buying what you have.

​​And even if it’s not a fit, I might know other people who might want to buy what you have.

​​Just write me now because — well, why not? It doesn’t cost you or oblige you in any way. And it might take this off your mind sooner rather than later.

Email pitches for highly customized service businesses

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The owner of a creative agency signed up to my list a couple weeks ago, and had a question:

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Would love to learn more about what kind of materials / services you offer in regards to specifically email pitches.

[My industry] is pulling back some right now, so we are having to put a larger emphasis on outbound, which we never really had to do before.

We are services based business and everything is so customized it makes it a challenge to really blanket offers.

However, we do get pretty good responses when we do put stuff out there.

Are you able to share some of what services you offer / any preferred reading that I should check out on your website etc?

===

There’s nothing on my site I would recommend for learning about cold outreach, and there are no cold outreach services I offer at the moment.

But I have been experimenting with cold emails myself, and I have been reading up and listening up on it.

It seems there are two schools of cold emailing:

#1. Carpet bombing, where the bulk of the work goes into setting up the technology for sending dozens or hundreds of automated “personal” emails each day, and feeding that with more or less qualified leads from various databases or from virtual assistants.

​​The idea here is to send out thousands of cold emails and maybe get two or three qualified responses.

#2. Social engineering, where, much like a red team in cybersecurity, you try to find a way into a specific organization by sending just the right message to just the right people.

The idea here is to send out 10 emails and maybe get 10 responses, which you then have to somehow twist and turn into suiting your purpose.

There’s been plenty written and said about the first approach to cold emailing.

There’s no doubt it works, but I’m personally not interested in it. And maybe, if you’re like the agency owner above, it’s not really an option because of the way your business is set up or what you offer.

So what about the second, social engineering approach?

It’s tricky and time intensive.

But if you’re after large accounts or valuable partner relationships, it can make sense to invest that time and to learn the tricks.

Again, this is not something I personally am teaching at the moment. But I do have something to recommend.

The worst part of this recommendation is that it’s free, which will make many people shrug and say, “Oh, I will come back to this later.”

The best part of this recommendation is that it might stop being free or disappear at any minute, particularly if people like me keep linking to it.

If you’d like to get it before it goes away, or before it gets a big price tag stuck on the side of it:

https://bejakovic.com/cold

The light at the end of the tunnel

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“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and the thing is, I love you.”

“What?”

“I love you.”

“How do you expect me to respond to this?”

“How about, you love me too?”

“How about: I’m leaving.”

That’s the start of the last scene of the 1989 romantic comedy When Harry Met Sally. In case you haven’t seen it, the movie goes like this:

The first time Harry and Sally meet, they hate each other. The second time they meet, Harry doesn’t even remember who Sally is. The third time they meet, Harry and Sally become friends. Then they sleep together, and things go south and they stop being friends.

And then one New Year’s Eve, Harry finally realizes he loves Sally, and he runs to meet her, and he declares his love. And she says, “I’m leaving.”

The fact is, screenwriter Nora Ephron and director Rob Reiner both felt that movie should end like this.

​​No way should it end with Harry and Sally winding up together. That’s not how the real world works. People in those kinds of relationships don’t end up together.

That’s how the first two drafts of the movie actually went. The bitter truth.

But in the third draft, Ephron wrote this final scene, and Reiner shot it. After Sally’s “I’m leaving,” Harry delivers a speech about all the little things he loves about her, and they kiss and they wind up together, forever, in love.

And that’s how the movie was released, and it was a big, big hit.

So what’s the point?

Well, maybe it’s obvious, but you can go negative and cynical and sarcastic for the whole movie, but you gotta end on an inspiring, positive note.

​​It’s gotta make sense to people and give them a feeling of hope, at least if you want to create something that has a chance to be a big big hit, something that can appeal to a wide swath of the market.

Or in the words of screenwriter and director David Mamet:

“Children jump around at the end of the day, to expend the last of that day’s energy. The adult equivalent, when the sun goes down, is to create or witness drama — which is to say, to order the universe into a comprehensible form.”

But now I have a problem:

I’ve just pulled back the curtain. And what’s behind the curtain is not so nice. So how can I end this email on an inspiring, positive note?

Well, I can admit to you that the world is a large and complex and often unjust place. But it does have its own structure. And just by reading these emails, you’re finding out bits and pieces of that structure, and that helps you make more sense of the world you live in, and it helps you shape and influence the world for the better.

I can also tell you that the above bit, about Harry and Sally and Nora and Rob, is part of a book I’m working on, the mythical “10 Commandments of Hypnotists, Pick Up Artists, Comedians, Copywriters, Con Men, Door-To-Door Salesmen, Professional Negotiators, Storytellers, Propagandists, and Stage Magicians.”

I’ve been working on this book for a long time. But there’s light at the end of the tunnel.

In the meantime, do you know about my other 10 Commandments book, 10 Commandments of A-List Copywriters?

It also collects bits and pieces of the structure of the world, and it can help you understand and shape that world for the better. In case you’d like to find out more:

https://bejakovic.com/10commandments

Riveting, personal story to fill my mistake quota

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Hold on to your seat, and prepare to be riveted by the following true and very personal story:

Two days ago, I meet up with my friend Adrian. Adrian suggests we go out to dinner tonight, just him, me, and my dad. (Adrian is also friends with my dad.)

I say fine.

Adrian and my dad and I text yesterday to confirm the place and time for the dinner. We quickly agree.

But then it turns out Adrian’s wife would like to join also, along with their 3-year old daughter. Oh, and can we move dinner three hours earlier because of his daughter’s bed time?

I’m not thrilled by the idea — the early dinner, the wife, the kid. I honestly tell Adrian the earlier time doesn’t work well because I also have a family lunch to go to in the afternoon.

He says he’ll check with the wife.

Throughout the rest of yesterday, there’s more tussling over WhatsApp. And then finally, in the early evening hours, Adrian decides to go back to the original plan, the original time, and the original company for the dinner.

TA-DAAA! The end.

Now that you’ve read this, I want to apologize. I know this story was only riveting in how stupid it was.

​​But how else to get the following point across in a way that sticks?

A couple months ago, I bought a book called Suddenly Talented by Sean D’Souza.

Sean you might know — he’s an Internet marketer who’s been in the game since before Google, and I’ve written about him often in this newsletter.

Sean is best known for his unorthodox marketing ideas. But he’s branched out also — to courses and workshops about cartooning, photography, and learning and skill acquisition, which is what Suddenly Talented is about.

I actually haven’t read Sean’s book yet.

​​But there’s a WhatsApp group for everyone who’s bought the book, where Sean holds court and explains his ideas about how to get good at anything, and quick.

One idea will probably be familiar to you — it’s to get okay with making mistakes, whether you’re drawing, learning a new language, or trying to write a daily email.

But Sean takes it one step further.

​​In his own workshops, he actually gives his students a mistake quota.

​​​In other words, he tells his students that they have to actively and consciously make a certain number of mistakes before he will let them even attempt to do the thing right.

Result? I don’t know, but I can guess:

1. People loosen up. They realize that a mistake is not as fatal as it might seem in their imagination.

2. People actually learn something, by actively dancing around the “right” thing to do. In the words of Claude Debussy, music is the space between the notes.

“Fine fine,” you might say, “enough with the poetry. Does this really work?”

I don’t know. But it sounded interesting enough to give it a try. That’s why I opened with the pointless and uninteresting story above.

Don’t open your emails like I did.

Or do. Do it to teach yourself that hey, even a terrible email doesn’t really cost me anything, and hey, maybe I’ll even learn something by doing things wrong.

Are you convinced? Are you not convinced? It’s okay either way.

But in case this email triggered something in your brain, you might want to check out my Most Valuable Email training. It comes with a swipe file of 51 interesting ideas, many of which have proven valuable to me and to the people who have gone through MVE, sometimes even paying for the entire course.

If you’d like to find out more:

https://bejakovic.com/mve

8 things not to do in your emails

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1. Give people bulleted lists of how to content without any stickiness

2. Use really obstruse, arcane, or recherché language

3. Open up with something vague and fluffy

4. Talk about yourself in a way that’s not relevant to the topic or interesting to your readers

5. Insult or demean your customers

6. Get needy

7. Have a story that goes nowhere and says nothing

8. Have a listicle that’s not 7 or 10 items long

Um. It might seem to you on first impression that I’m telling you not to do some things in emails that I’ve actually done in this very email.

And you know what they say about first impressions.

They come before second impressions.

And they tend to be right more often than not.

If you’re wondering why I would deliberately tell you not to do some things that I’m doing myself, well, I’ll have more to say about that tomorrow.

For today, here’s one bonus thing not to do in your emails:

9. Write an email that in no way presells the offer you’re going to make

And on that note, here’s a course that has little to do with today’s email, but that might still be very valuable to you:

https://bejakovic.com/mve

Agency clients who don’t stay

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Last week, I was talking to the COO at a health clinic.

The CEO of that clinic — the doctor who heads the clinic — has written a good book, with lots of top endorsements and lots of 5-star reviews on Amazon.

But the book is hardly a best seller. I’m guessing it maybe makes a few dozen sales a month.

“You know,” I said in the voice of a precocious 9-year-old child, “you can run ads on Amazon to promote the book.” I’m smart like that, and I know lots of stuff, so I like to show it off.

“Oh yeah we tried that,” the COO said. “We hired an agency a while back to run ads on Amazon for us. But it didn’t drive that many more sales, and we were paying the agency $1k a month just to keep it going. So we stopped.”

Now, here are a few random facts, which I hope to snap together for you like nuclei colliding and fusing to release a tremendous amount of energy:

1. The core offer for this health clinic is a program that costs $50k a year

2. Rich, successful people tend to read books

3. People who read a book all the way through are prime prospects for an upsell, even a ridiculously elastic one ($5 => $50k)

You see where I’m going with this?

It’s quite feasible that, for this particular business, one good extra client a year, attracted via the help of this Amazon ads agency, would pay for the entire year’s services of the ads agency, and then some.

That would be great for the health clinic, for the Amazon ads agency, and presumably, for the patient who had decided to invest in that expensive year-long program.

And yet, it wasn’t happening.

I’m bringing this up because over the past few weeks, along with talking to health clinic COOs, I’ve also been talking to people who offer services and run agencies of different stripes.

I’ve heard a few of them complaining:

“We can’t make clients see the unique value of our services”

“The clients are never permanent, and I seem like a Chinese acrobat juggling many plates at once”

“Clients are comparing my work to much cheaper freelancers”

A part of this really can come down to having bum clients. Not much to do there, except find better clients.

But what if you have — or have had — clients like the health clinic I wrote about above? Somebody with a solid business… a good product… decent marketing… and still they couldn’t see the value in continuing to pay for your services, which should be plugging up a real gap in their business?

Well, in that case, write me and tell me about it.

I’m curious to hear your story.

And maybe we can figure out a way to prevent this from happening again… and even to profit from those clients who already got away.

The highest paid quality on earth

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Last night, I started reading a little book on door knocking.

Door knocking?

Yep, it’s a real skill. And a lucrative one. ​​​

​​​The book was written by a real estate agent who built her entire career by going up to a stranger’s door, knocking on said door, and if somebody opened, asking if they wanted to sell their home.

​​Most of the time, the people inside said no. So the real estate agent would turn around, walk down to the next house, and do it all over again.

The author of the book gives a few good reasons why a sane person might want to live their life like this. Here’s a few that might resonate with you:

===

You will earn more money than most doctors, lawyers, pilots, and professors. You will have more freedom to come and go than almost any other professional, and you will have a saleable product (your business) that will continue to support you after you exit the industry.

===

I love this book so far, and in particular I love what the author says is the number one quality that leads to success as a door knocker, and by extension, to success in opening up any kind of sales conversation.

Can you guess what this quality is?

I’ll give you a hint. In fact I’ll give you a few hints, and tell you what it’s not:

* Persistence. A lot of people persist in spite of not getting any results or making any sales. (Such as, ahem, myself for large stretches of writing this newsletter.)

* Intelligence. Good God no.

* Extroversion. Now we’re getting a little warmer, but in the words of Eddie Murphy, that ain’t it…

* Likeability. Sure, being seen as likeable helps open conversations. But a lot of people, myself included, tend to default to thinking that you’re either likeable or not.

​​Of course, that’s not true.

​​We each morph from moment to moment, and from environment to environment. Our likability goes up and down, because it’s not really inherent to us. It’s in other people’s heads, and not something that we have control over. So likeability ain’t it either.

I’ve now given you some hints. I told you what this magic quality is not. As to what it is?

If you’d like to know that, I’ll tell you. Or rather, I’ll point you to it.

​​This quality makes up chapter one of one of the greatest sales books of all time, where it’s called the “highest paid quality on earth.”

If you’d like to know what this quality is and why it is so valuable and how to get it, read the book.

​​Plus, read the book because no less of an authority than Gary Bencivenga, the A-list copywriter who gets the most love an adulation from other top-level copywriters and marketers, credits his great success to this book.

And by the way, you can cheat. You can find out what this quality is without reading the book.

Somehow, I suspect this will do absolutely nothing for you. But you decide. Here’s the book, with all its sales wisdom:

https://bejakovic.com/highest-paid

Why do I keep linking to Amazon???

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I got a question from a reader last week, which I didn’t realize until just now had a slight dig at me towards the end:

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I noticed that you linked to Amazon quite a lot in recent weeks … curious about your rationale?

Engagement, commission, or simply being unpredictable (ultimately become predictable)?

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How’s this for predictable:

It is well known, by anybody who knows anything about Internet marketing, that linking to Amazon, particularly to books on Amazon, particularly to books on Amazon that feature word “eskimo” in the title, increases Gmail deliverability. This in turn translates to higher engagement and greater retention on expensive continuity programs like the ones I don’t sell.

No. Of course not. It’s nothing like that.

There’s no kind of tactical reason for why I’ve linked to a few Amazon books over the past few weeks.

I did it because the books were valuable and useful to me, and I thought they could be valuable and useful to you.

But beyond that, there is another, more personal reason.

I could explain that reason in my own words.

But the fact is, somebody has already explained it for me, in words that are so good thath they have stuck with me for 6+ years now, and that come ringing back in my head at certain key moments in my life.

If you’d like to find out those words, and maybe learn something that can help you run your business and your life better for the long term, then read the following, which is not an Amazon book:

https://www.psychotactics.com/greater-profits/

What comes after email promos?

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Last week, I got an email with the subject line, “quick question John.” I opened it up to read:

“I’ve been following your work since you’ve launched Simple Money Email – love your stuff!”

Mhm, sure you do. It’s Simple Money Emails, with an s, in the plural.

I skimmed over the rest of the guy’s message, which tried to be clever and funny. Finally, I got to the offer at the end:

“Would you be interested in re-launching Simple Money Email (or any other one of your courses) – to make $25k, $50k–and depending on your list size–even $100k… by the end of May?”

I would absolutely love that — especially since this cold email pitch hit my inbox on June 3rd, three days after the end of May.

But whatever. My point here is not to take apart this guy’s cold email and all the problems in it.

My point is simply to highlight that I, John Bejakovic, who am currently a hot seat coach in Shiv Shetti’s Performance Copywriter Method mastermind, where we teach people how to do email promos, am being pitched by copywriters I’ve never met, who want to run an email promo to “relaunch” my course for me.

All of which makes me wonder what’s coming in the future.

​​​Not necessarily as a replacement for email promos. Email promos work, the same way that email marketing works, the same way that marketing works.

No, what I’m wondering about is what will be the next business opportunity.

​​What will copywriters latch onto next as a thing to pitch to business owners?

​​What will business owners latch onto as the next business opportunity to pitch to people, copywriters included?

I have my own ideas about this.

​​But I’d like to hear yours as well.

​​If you’d like to share them with me, hit reply.

​​I’m not promising anything in return. But who knows, maybe we can get into an interesting conversation, and figure out something valuable for the future.