Copywriting

The secret online fountain of the truth

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“You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about in parties, you WANT me to be overweight, you NEED me to be overweight.”

Sometimes you gotta probe a little.

For example, I heard Ben Settle mention on his podcast, and maybe in a recent Email Players issue, how you get to the bottom of your market’s worst fears.

You first ask them (for example), “Why would you want to lose weight?”

“Because I don’t like the way I look and it’s unhealthy.”

“I see. Any other reasons?”

And then they think. And think. And if you’re lucky, the real story comes out:

“To tell you the truth, I was in a store yesterday and as soon as I came in, this snotty-looking sales girl intercepted me at the door and she said, ‘We don’t have anything in your size.’ I just got so humiliated and furious I decided something had to change.” (True story, by the way.)

You see, it’s that second, follow-up question which really gets the deep, dark, painful reasons why people do what they do.

It’s like the climax in A Few Good Men.

Tom Cruise’s character keeps probing and probing, asking just one more question…

Until he gets Colonel Jessup, played by Jack Nicholson, to expose himself and yell out the famous line:

“YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!”

Well, as a copywriter and a marketer, the issue is not that I can’t handle the truth.

Rather, the trouble is that I often can’t get at it.

After all, I rarely have my prospects before me.

I don’t have Colonel Jessup sitting in a courtroom either, waiting for my interrogation.

Instead, I have to go online and do some sleuthing to try to uncover THE TRUTH rather than those surface-level answers everybody is programmed to give.

The trouble is, all the typical places that you will hear recommended — Facebook, Instagram, personal blogs — are full of social posturing, and they don’t actually show people’s dark and scaly underbellies.

However, I do have a reliable way of getting that information.

In fact, just as an exercise, I tried to come up with THE TRUTH for a typical person interested in essential oils.

Within a few minutes, I had an avatar.

Yes, I found out what this person looks like, what her hobbies are, what her favorite TV show is…

But I also found out what rare disease she has, her personality type, and her insecurities around her friends .

This is NOT stuff that you will ever find on Facebook.

But it is out there, right on on the Internet savannah — if you know where to look. And though it might seem creepy, it’s a necessary part of the research you have to do if you are going to target an audience effectively.

Anyways, if you want to know what this deep fountain of personal information is, you’re in luck.

I’ll talk about it in more detail in my upcoming book.

Sign up below and I’ll send you a free copy when I’m finished with it:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

Gattefossé’s un-accidental discovery

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The legend goes like this:

The year was 1910. And a French perfumery chemist, named René-Maurice Gattefossé, was working in his laboratory as per uzh.

Except this day, the lab experiment went bad. There was an explosion, and Gattefossé’s hand got badly burned.

In a moment of fright and shock, Gattefossé dipped his burned hand into the nearest vat of liquid, which just happened to be…

Lavender essential oil. (He was a perfumery chemist, remember?)

Over the coming days, Gattefossé observed the disgusting pulp of his hand. It was healing well. Scarring was minimal. He recovered wonderfully.

Impressed by these results, he went on to dedicate his life to studying the health benefits of essential oils. And, the legend concludes, that’s how the modern field of aromatherapy was born.

The end. Only one problem:

This is not exactly how it happened.

Gattefossé tells the actual story himself in his book Aromatherapie.

Yes, his hand got burned (in fact, both his hands), and yes, he used lavender oil to help the healing. But the most dramatic element of the story — the accidental dipping into the vat of lavender oil — seems to be made up. Instead, Gattefossé already knew of the healing benefits of lavender oil, and he used lavender oil in a methodical process to treat his hand once the fire was already out.

Somehow though, the true story doesn’t sell.

Which brings up an important point if you ever want to persuade people. Just because a story is true, doesn’t automatically make it good sales copy fodder.

For example, the “accidental discovery” plot will almost always beat out the “slow and methodical progress” plot.

My gut feeling is that this comes down to that old Jim Camp favorite, vision.

It’s easy and dramatic to imagine Gattefossé screaming out in pain and dunking his hand into the nearest vat of liquid. It’s not so easy to imagine him, at some uncertain time later on, using lavender oil to perform a precise and tedious intervention on his burn.

Of course, this applies to emails as well.

And no, you don’t have to make anything up to have successful sales emails. But you do have to choose your stories well.

If you want to see some of the stories I’ve successfully used to promote health products (supplements, info courses), then take a look inside my upcoming book on email marketing for the health space. You can get a free copy when it comes out by signing up below:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

“Show and sell” day at Copywriting High

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I listened to another episode of David Garfinkel’s Copywriters Podcast today.

This episode was about the old writing maxim “Show, don’t tell.”

I wasn’t 100% clear what David’s position was on this idea.

But it did get me thinking of the sales letter I am currently writing, for my own book on essential oils.

The version 1.0 lead for this sales letter was a placeholder, and a lame placeholder at that:

Essential oils — Mother Nature’s miracle cure…

Or an expensive gimmick peddled by multi-level-marketing companies?

Well, a little bit of both.

Here’s the truth: essential oils can really be a wonderful help for issues like… [yadda yadda yadda]

After I listened to David’s podcast, I went back and rewrote this in a “Show, don’t tell” way:

Back in May 2017, a woman in Florida thought she was preparing a nice bath for herself.

Like many times before, she added some essential oils to Epsom salts, and let this sit for 30 minutes before adding it to her bathwater.

She then got in.

This time, however, the bath wasn’t the usual relaxing nighttime routine.

Instead, she got painful burns on her back.

“Normal brand essential oils,” she later wrote, “and coconut oil took the red burns away, but did I do something wrong?”

[it then goes on to explain what she should have done]

More effective?

I think it is.

This “show, don’t tell” approach is something I actually do all the time when writing sales emails.

For example, when I look at the 10 emails I wrote for RealDose Nutrition’s new front-end email sequence, exactly half kick off with a story that “shows” either the problem or the benefit.

Does it work?

Well, the new sequence is outperforming the old one by 30%.

So you can say it’s “Show and sell.”

Anyways, if you want to know more about the little tricks I built into that email sequence, and others I wrote for RealDose, check out my upcoming book. It’s free if you sign up for it now, $17 when it goes on sale:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

The trouble with the best PR video of all time

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A very popular Reddit thread appeared today, titled

“NASA Just Published the Best PR Video of All Time”

It turns out we’re going back to the moon. This time, we’re staying. And that’s just the start.

There’s awesome adventure…

Exciting exploration…

Sexy science…

Top-notch technology…

This video’s got it all.

There’s only one thing this greatest PR video doesn’t have. It’s a small thing. But pretty, pretty important. Particularly if you’re ever looking to influence anybody, and get them to do something.

I’m talking about a call-to-action.

NASA’s video doesn’t give you a link to a webpage where you can find out more. It doesn’t ask you to support them by sending in donations. It doesn’t even ask you to study hard so you can become a NASA engineer one day.

Instead, it just leaves you hanging.

Going somewhere… just not clear where

Maybe that’s ok for NASA.

But it’s definitely not ok if you’re writing sales copy.

Especially if you do a good job pumping up your readers’ emotional juice (like the NASA video certainly does).

The thing is, including a call-to-action in your copy doesn’t have to be difficult, nasty, or salesy.

It can be clean and simple.

For example:

I’ll soon be putting out a book on email marketing, with a focus on the health space. If you’re in the health space (or you hope to be one day, if you study hard ), then it might of interest to you. To get a free copy when it comes out, sign up here:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

4 quotes about the unimportance of sales copy

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I was listening to the latest edition of the Copywriters Podcast, in which David Garfinkel interviews Brian Cassingena.

Brian used to be the head copywriter at Mindvalley, and now he seems to have gone rogue, helping individual businesses improve their sales funnels.

David asked Brian about the biggest mistake he sees with funnels. This was Brian’s response:

“[Businesses] are not split-testing enough. We assume — copywriters are the same — we assume we know what would work best.”

Isn’t that what you pay a copywriter for though?

A good copywriter — an A-lister like Brian — can be expected to get top-gun results much of the time, or at least drastically outperform some schmuck off the street.

Right?

Maybe not.

Here’s what Dan Ferrari, another big name who writes sales copy for the Motley Fool, has to say on the topic:

“The C-level marketers that test 50 promos per year will beat the A-list marketers that test 5.”

What?

Come on, Dan.

Seriously.

What about guys like Gary Bencivenga, whose copy never lost, always became the control, and made his clients millions of dollars without fail?

Well, here’s Gary Bencivenga himself, describing a part of his decision process on whether he would accept a project or not:

“What I really want to know about the advertising is whether or not I see an easy way for me to beat it. If the advertising was created by somebody like Clayton Makepeace, it’s an immediate turnoff.”

The fact is, Gary wasn’t “selling ice to eskimos.”

He would only take on “easy” projects where he had a great chance of succeeding right up front (no harm there, it’s a smart strategy).

And even then, he would spend months and months upon research, to ensure he would really get the best angle.

Which leads me to the final quote, this from Ben Settle (I’m paraphrasing):

“Copywriting isn’t hard if you know your market well.”

The thing is, copywriting isn’t some dark art where you either know the magic spell or you die.

Instead, it mainly comes down to two things:

1. Researching your market.

2. Testing to see which appeal works best.

If you want to see how this simple 2-step approach can successfully be used in practice (specifically, for selling health products such as supplements), you might like my upcoming book on email marketing for the health space.

It’s not out yet, but you can sign up to get it for free when I do finish it. Here’s the link:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails

Woman cheats on fiancé with ghost, marries poltergeist

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A UK woman by the name of Amethyst Realm claims to have had sex with a ghost.

In fact, this spectral affair caused the breakup of her flesh-and-blood engagement, after her fiancé caught her in bed with said ghoul.

“He saw the shape of a man through the window when he pulled up outside,” Amethyst said.

Amethyst went on a bit of a romp after the breakup, sleeping with over a dozen more ghosts.

Her promiscuous days are done, however. She is settling down and getting married to an Australian poltergeist.

“When I was in Australia taking a walk out in the bush, just suddenly it approached me. Just something you feel, an emotional physical presence,” she said.

How did the marriage proposal happen?

“There was no going down on one knee,” Amethyst explained. “He doesn’t have knees. But for the first time, I heard him speak.”

“I could actually hear his voice and it was beautiful. Deep, sexy and real.”

The couple are now planning a countryside wedding.

“I fell in love with it I guess. It’s the one,” Amethyst said.

It’s not Valentine’s day today, so why am I bringing up this romantic story?

Two reasons.

One, it’s pretty fascinating.

Two, I want to contrast it with some Halloween-themed emails I’ve been getting all day long.

These emails are all about the ghoulish and ghostly and creepy things that happen to copywriters, particularly when dealing with clients. The pitch is for some kind of copywriting product.

The trouble is, the emails are weak. The scenarios they describe are generic and simply not concrete or gruesome enough. It seems like the copywriter who wrote the emails just made these scenarios up.

To me, this just signals laziness.

After all, a bit of research will unearth a graveyard full of chilling or bizarre stories that readers won’t be able to ignore.

This is the kind of stuff that even the best writers cannot make up.

I’ve accepted this fact, and that’s why I don’t shy away from lurking on sex forums, tabloid websites, and conspiracy-theory Facebook groups.

That’s where you find the choicest treats, like the story of Amethyst Realm.

If this is the kind of copywriting you need for your business, you can contact me here.

How to succeed as a copywriter on Upwork

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A guy named Nick Tubis interviewed me tonight for a product he’s making.

He actually hired me on the online freelance platform Upwork, to talk about how I became successful as a copywriter, on Upwork.

So Nick and I talked for an hour, and I gave him the full story of my Upwork experience so far.

In the end, he asked me, “Do you have one hack you would recommend to anyone getting started?”

I told him the truth:

Anybody can compete for any copywriting job on Upwork.

Ultimately, it doesn’t matter how much copywriting experience you have.

How much Upwork history you have.

What your background is.

All you do need are a few pieces of relevant previous work.

In fact, even one piece of relevant sample work can set you above the rest of the hungry crowd of freelancers crawling over each other to get a job.

Don’t believe me?

Let’s say a client just posted a job ad titled “Looking for 10-part email sequence to promote new supplement.”

My “application” for a job like this would simply be:

“I specialize in email marketing and I’ve written a lot about supplements.
Here are a few relevant samples:
sample1
sample2
sample3
Take a look, and if you like what you see, let’s talk in more detail.”

I regularly get 4-figure copywriting projects — and I even got Nick to pay me for talking about my Upwork expertise. And the stupid-simple template above is the only way I ever apply for a job.

“That’s great for you, John,” you might say. “But where am I supposed to get those relevant samples? Nobody’s hired me, so I can’t build a portfolio, and therefore nobody will hire me!”

Easy, friend.

You don’t need any previous paying clients to build a small but highly targeted portfolio.

Simply find a job you would like to get.

Then write a sample that’s very close to what they are looking for.

For example, in the hypothetical job I invented above, you would just write one email  promoting a supplement.

Slap this into your application, send it over to the client, and you’re off to the races.

Will it work every time? No. But if you do this every day, I would expect you would have a paying client by the end of the week.

By the way, even though I’ve had a lot of success on Upwork, I’m actively looking to move off the platform for various reasons.

That’s why, if you are interested in hiring me to do your copy, don’t  go to Upwork. Instead, get in touch with me here.

Bejako suffers from sirocco

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“It’s a punishment in itself, the mind becomes exhausted, the joy of living seeps out through blurred eyes and darkened faces. You cannot even love yourself during sirocco, so how to make reasoned decisions about others!”
— Tereza Buconić Gović

Legend says that in medieval Dubrovnik, on the Croatian coast, a law decreed that no political decisions could ever be made during times of sirocco, a kind of nasty, hot, southerly wind that seems to disturb the mind.

Sirocco is happening right now, and I can seriously feel it. It’s hot and humid outside like it’s the middle of May. I’m not sleeping well, I’m tired, and my head hurts. I keep looking towards the horizon and hoping for a storm that will clear this evil wind away.

So what’s the point of this?

Well, sirocco.

It’s an interesting and clear concept. Plus I can tie it into a personal story.

In other words, it makes for a great opening for a bit of copy, most likely a sales email.

The thing is, these kinds of personal, clear, interesting concepts are lying around in plain sight, every day. They just need to be noticed and (most probably) written down — and then, when the time comes, used as a great idea to open an email with.

4 examples of shameless headline swiping

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“Learning how to artfully swipe is probably the most important skill a copywriter can have.”
— Harlan Kilstein

I have a big swipe file of complete sales letters, but more than anything, I like to swipe headlines
After all, each headline is really an angle, a hook in itself. If you get the headline right, much of the copy writes itself.

My favorite source for headlines to swipe is not direct response copy
As I’ve mentioned before, I regularly go to Hacker News, a nerd bulletin board, and I pay attention to which general interest articles I click on. I write all these headlines down on an index card and put them in a growing stack under my pillow.

When it’s time to write copy, I go to my swiped headlines stack
And I force myself to write at least 10 or so headlines, using entirely different templates. Here are 4 such shamelessly swiped headlines, and the reasoning behind each:

1. Dog bites Trump -> The content is in the list

The original headline is brilliant, and it might seem that the second headline has nothing to do with it. But what’s really going on? The first headline is simply a modification of saying that’s popular among a specific audience (journalists: “Man bites dog”). Unfortunately, I couldn’t work the uber-clickable “Trump” into my own headline, but I could tweak an existing popular saying (direct marketers: “The money is in the list”).

2. Poland was shockingly liberal during 13th century -> Antibiotics can be shockingly good at causing weight gain

I’m not crazy about power words like “shocking” because they’re overused — every wannabe viral article or video is either “jaw-dropping”, “shocking”, or “epic”. That doesn’t mean that power words cannot or do not work, particularly if the rest of the headline is actually interesting in itself. In both the original headline and my own version, the headline was an interesting fact (rather than a screaming benefit) and the “shocking” power word increased curiosity a notch or two.

3. Why you will marry the wrong person -> Why your kraut will develop mold

Ok, this one is straightforward: Why [major unspoken fear of your target audience]. (My version was a subject line for an email promoting a home fermenting product.)

4. “Close to tears, he left at intermission”: How Stanley Kubrick upset Arthur C. Clarke -> “Almost fell over at how bad I looked”: Essential oil adverse reaction report

This is a good example of a headline template that I never see in direct response copy — a dramatic quote followed by a curiosity-baiting description of the content. Even though it’s not common for direct response, it must work, because similar headlines have sucked millions of people into reading articles.

The sink-or-swim sales letter close

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Yesterday, I was finishing up a sales letter and I got to my least favorite part, the close.

That’s when you’ve made your offer, and now make one final big push to get the reader to buy. Many times, this is where sales letters reiterate all the benefits of the thing they are selling. Other times, they paint a bleak picture of how lonely and sad your life will be if you don’t buy.

I decided to do something different. I used an idea that I got from a sales letter from Ben Settle, which he included along with his monthly print newsletter several months ago. The sales letter was for a new $279 product for freelance copywriters that Ben was selling. it wrapped up with the following:

“It’s sink or swim around here to encourage implementation. So if you don’t think you can make your $279 back, simply don’t buy it. Otherwise, go here before April 1st to grab it for $100 off:”

Ben’s sales letter had a bunch of curiosity-soaked bullet points, but none of them pulled me in or made me consider buying. However, this one final statement almost made me get my credit card right away and order right away. Here’s why this close is so good:

1. It’s a challenge. This close doesn’t try to convince you. It doesn’t say “Just imagine how much richer you will be with this information!” It does just the opposite — it tries to dismiss you. To me at least, this was a challenge that I wanted to rise up to.

2. It creates vision. When I read this, I immediately asked myself, “Could I make $279 from this information?” And I then started imagining different scenarios where that could happen. This is what negotiation expert Jim Camp called creating vision in your adversary’s mind.

3. It’s different. Again, most other sales letters try to close you with high-pressure sales tactics. This makes Ben’s approach stand out, and it creates curiosity and intrigue.

4. It’s non-needy. Again, no high-pressure tactics here. This signals you don’t need the sale (as you genuinely don’t). Ironically, this will make it more likely for you to get the sale.

5. It repels the buyers you don’t want to have. “Repulsion marketing” is another cornerstone of Ben’s philosophy, and this sales letter close embodies it perfectly.

6. It’s about consumption. This close isn’t about being a dick (though it might sound like that to some). It’s about what’s good for you and for your prospects, something that Sean D’Souza calls an emphasis on consumption. In other words, if some prospects won’t get value out of what you’re selling, why would you sell it to them?

Now I’m sure this approach probably goes back many thousands of years, back to when the first copywriters etched their sales letters in wet clay tablets.

But if it has a name yet, I haven’t heard it. And so, in honor and memory of Ben’s sales letter, where I first saw it, I will call it the “sink-or-swim close” from now on.