Business Of Copy

Copywriting for cavemen

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A while back, some scientists at Cambridge University studied a bunch of hunter gatherer tribes, and they came up with an inspiring conclusion:

Hunter gatherers do not work very hard.

In fact, when you add up all the hunting and gathering they do in a typical week, it adds up to about 20 hours.

Compare that to the typical work week of a human being in agricultural society (30 hours) or in an industrial society (40+ hours).

The point being that maybe we’re not evolved to be all gung-ho about non-stop sweat and toil.

And so if you feel a little lazy sometimes, blame it on tens of thousands of years of evolution that our ancestors spent hanging around caves and watching the caveman equivalent of Netflix.

Now, here’s a bit of good news.

If you aren’t all that crazy about long work—weeks, then copywriting might be a good career choice for you.

Some of the top copywriters out there — including Gene Schwartz, Gary Bencivenga, and Parris Lampropoulos — have stated that a good day for them consists of three hours of solid writing.

Pretty cavemannish schedule.

Plus it gets better.

If you’re easily distracted on top of being a little lazy, you’ve got an additional leg up (three legs down?) on all those other monkeys who want to write successful copy.

Because much of copywriting — 60% according to top copywriting coach David Garfinkel — often goes to research.

Ie. reading.

Following random links.

Kicking rocks around.

And looking for that great idea that will help you sell this weeks copy assignment.

So maybe you’re wondering where I’m going with this.

And it’s simply to give you a bit of encouragement in case you’re wondering whether you have what it takes to be a copywriter.

Odds are good that even the things that you might blame yourself for — such as apparent laziness and distractability — might help you in your journey to get to that top level of marketing and writing copy, if you know how to use them.

Of course, there are lots of other things you’ll need as well.

So if you have questions about succeeding as a copywriter, and if you want my opinion on the steps you need to take besides not working very hard and clicking on lots of seductive links, here’s where to go:
https://bejakovic.com/upwork-book-notification-list/

When to accept “touch up” copywriting jobs

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Last week, after a disappointing run-in with my hairdresser, I wrote about 10 additional services copywriters can offer to their clients.

Copywriter Leah Luong wrote in to get some clarification on strategy #8:

“As a newbie copywriter, I really enjoyed this email. At least they don’t make you into meat pies these days! (Sweeney Todd reference).

“I have a question about #8 The Dreaded Touch Up – How do I know if I should take the gig? In what situations should I run for the hills?”

The Dreaded Touch-Up is when the client comes to you and says, “We have this copy… It’s great, just needs to be touched up a bit.”

Like I wrote in that post last week, I normally avoid this kind of job — but there are cases when it makes sense to take it on. And Leah is asking what those cases are.

Before I give you my opinion, let me tell you about the four types of copywriting clients.

This comes from A-list copywriter Bob Bly, who says clients can fall into one of four categories: arrogant, ignorant, both, or neither.

Says Bob, it’s ok to work with arrogant clients. They know just as much or more about marketing as you do.

It’s also ok to work with ignorant clients. They defer to your opinion and let you take the lead.

What’s NOT ok is working with clients who are both arrogant and ignorant. These folks don’t know much about marketing (“This hairball of a sales letter is almost perfect, just needs some jazzing up”) but they are inflexible in their ignorance (“It absolutely shouldn’t take you more than 2 hours MAX to fix this mess up”).

So the first step of the Acceptable Touch-Up is to make sure you’re not dealing with clients who are both ignorant and arrogant.

Which, by default, leaves you with clients who are just ignorant.

Not ignorant in general.

Just ignorant of what needs to be done to fix their existing copy.

That’s why you, as the copywriter, should take charge and set expectations.

So in the case I referred to last week, I looked over the sales letter, and I found the few things — headline, lead, a couple of bullets — that I thought would make the biggest improvement if changed.

And I told the client, “I’ll write a new headline, new lead, and change these bullets for you, all for the reasonable price of whatever. Does that work for you?”

They agreed. So it made sense for me to take the job. And they were happy with the result, because it was exactly what I said I would do.

That’s my best advice when it comes to dealing with the Dreaded Touch-Up.

In case you’ve got other questions about how to deal with copywriting clients in various situations, you might be interested in the following:

https://bejakovic.com/upwork-book-notification-list/

The latest bad news for direct response copywriters

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Here’s a fair warning to any copywriters out there:

I just read that Chase Bank has signed a 5-year contract with Persado.

Never heard of Persado?

Neither had I.

It turns out they are a provider of AI-generated marketing copy.

In other words, instead of hiring a marketing agency or in-house talent or (gasp!) even freelance copywriters, Chase Bank will be getting their copy (at least some of it) done by tireless, uncomplaining, non-unionized software robots.

“Pff,” you might say, “good luck to them. I’m sure the copy will be terrible and they’ll just waste their money.”

Not so fast. Chase didn’t just choose Persado because AI is hip or because AI-generated copy is cheap. No. It also performs better. Here’s a test for you:

A: “Access cash from the equity in your home”

B: “It’s true—You can unlock cash from the equity in your home”

Who wrote what and which headline won?

Think about it and then read on.

The first ad headline was written by a red-blooded human copywriter. The second was written by a pale and pasty AI sprite. The AI sprite got the better response.

I think this is a sign of things to come.

Headlines might be the first to go, since they might be easier to write than entire paragraphs and sales arguments and whatever else.

But at the same time… haven’t you heard that the headline is 80% of the ad?

So if computers are writing better headlines than humans, human copywriters might not be getting so well paid in the near future.

Now at this point, maybe you are getting a little nervous. I know I am.

And so I want to tell you that this news doesn’t have to spell doom.

For one thing, in any crisis, it seems that many people suffer, while a few rise to the top and profit even more than before.

Maybe that can be you, if you can really hone your persuasion and copy skills and rise to being in the 1% of all copywriters out there.

The second thing is that copywriting, while it is a noble and profitable profession, maybe should not be your end goal.

Instead, maybe copywriting should simply be a kind of “Trojan horse” that you use to embed yourself within a successful business — AI revolution be damned.

That’s something to think about — even if you’re a rank copywriting newbie.

Anyways, if you’ve got questions about how to succeed in the business of copy, then I have something you might like. It’s a report that summarizes my experience getting well-paying clients during the first few years of my freelance copywriting career.

In case you want to know more about this report, check out the following:

https://bejakovic.com/upwork-book-notification-list/

10 additional services copywriters can sell to their clients

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I just got my hair cut. Unfortunately, hair-cutting is all the hairdresser offered to do.

It makes me yearn for the good old days when a respectable barber would cut your hair, trim your mustache, and even pull your rotten tooth out for you.

Oh well. Too bad for hairdressers.

Copywriters can do better, though. Here are 10 additional services that I’ve used (or tried to use) to up-sell and down-sell and cross-sell clients:

#1. The Oliver Twist

This is when the client comes to you, soup bowl in hand, and says, “Please sir, I want some more.” In other words, you simply sell them the same service again. For example, last summer, I wrote one sales email for a guy with a big Clickbank product in the men’s health niche. He liked it, so he hired me to write a new such email every day.

#2. The top of the slide

This is writing copy for one part of the sales funnel, and then for an earlier part. Example: a couple of years ago I was hired to rewrite a VSL. When that was done, I kept in touch with the same client. Eventually, we agreed that I would also rewrite the emails he was using to drive traffic to the VSL.

#3. The after-party

This is just the opposite of no. 2. Example: I once had a job to write headlines for native ads. That job ended. But after a bit of back-and-forth, I was hired to also write the actual advertorials that the native ads led to.

#4. A second tunnel through the mountain

If you’ve done a good job for a client on one project, odds are good they have another very similar opportunity — another product, another funnel — which needs almost the exact treatment.

So just recently I was asked to rewrite a product page for a new supplement company. I did. the client was satisfied with the work, and I immediately got the chance to do another product page for another product in the exact same style.

#5. Oranges instead of apples

Sometimes it pays to stand up to clients. Last autumn, I was contacted by a client who wanted me to write a VSL. After a bit of talking, I told him he needs to pick a segment of the market he plans to target. And so we agreed that, instead of the VSL, I would write emails to his existing list to figure out which segment might sell the best.

#6. Outsourced kaizen

This is when you handle the optimization of the copy or of the funnel. Right now, I’m talking to a client who got in touch regarding an advertorial. So I asked him a question straight out of Jim Camp’s playbook: “Who do you have in your corner who can help you optimize this thing to ensure it performs well?” We’ll see if he has someone, or if he’s interested in having me handle this.

#7. Mouth flapping

Parris Lampropoulos, who is famous as an A-list copywriter, once said he actually makes most his money from consulting with his clients rather than the actual copywriting — in spite of the massive royalties he’s typically paid.

But you don’t need to be a marketer of Parris’s stature to get paid for consulting (aka flapping your mouth). Back in my dark and early Upwork days, I had a difficult client. However, one good thing was he would pay me simply to get on the call and brainstorm, or more often, to shoot his ideas down.

#8. The dreaded touchup

When asked to “simply fix up” existing copy, I usually run like I’m being chased by a bunch of angry bees. But I have done it in the past, and sometimes it proved to be good money for little work. For example, I once rewrote the lead (the first page and a half) of a pretty messy sales letter for a live event about investing, and I got paid what was a princely sum for me at the time.

#9. Money for nothing

This is an idea I got from Travis Sago: you take a client’s “trashcan asset,” turn it into risk-free money, and split the profits. I haven’t done this yet, but not for want of trying — I keep talking to all of my current and past clients about it.

#10. Trousers and britches

Sometimes clients need different formats and they are willing to pay you for it. Example: I once wrote a 2,000 word script for a Facebook lead-gen video. But is 2,000 words the right length? The client wasn’t sure. So I took that same script, pared it down to 600 words, gave him that as a second piece of copy, and earned a bit of extra money.

If you make a bit of an effort to suss out what your client might need, and then pick and choose from the above list, you won’t just make yourself more money.

Instead, you will also solidify your relationship with a client, help them be more successful, and profit doubly down the line. And if you want more advice on how to succeed in the business of copywriting, you might like the following:

https://bejakovic.com/upwork-book-notification-list/

Awkward high-school dates with copywriting clients

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“I’m supposed to invite you to hang out with us on Friday.”

It was 10th grade, and I had just started a new high school. There was a group of proto-hipsters there who thought I showed some promise. So one of them was sent as an emissary to invite me to a concert with them.

I went.

The concert was terrible, in one of those rat-infested Baltimore slum-houses.

But afterwards, we went back to the safe suburbs.

Now, the key to this story is that there was a girl in the group who was like a breastier version of Audrey Hepburn.

Quiet, pretty, and apparently interested in me.

“Would you like to go on the porch and get some air?” she asked me when we got back to the suburbs.

I mumbled something and followed her out.

So there we were, in the early October night, staring at the moon, occasionally looking over at each other, and saying…

Nothing.

I don’t know how long this went on but I guess between two minutes and two hours.

Eventually she got restless.

And then resigned.

“I’m gonna go back inside,” breasty Audrey said.

And that was it.

She went on to date a sequence of local bad boy rock stars and then she became a painter or a potter or maybe a basket weaver.

That night was the closest I got to her. And even though she was making herself as approachable as could be, I was simply too dimwitted to know what to do.

I bring this story up for two reasons.

First, because I like to rub salt into my wounds and remind myself of the many times I’ve managed to miss a wide-open goal.

The second reason is more practical and perhaps more relevant to you.

Because a similar scenario to the above plays out every day  on platforms such as Upwork.

Most Upwork clients are on there because they don’t have any other place to find copywriters.

They’ve never worked with a copywriter before.

They don’t know what they should expect of you.

They don’t know what they should do themselves.

It’s much like dating early on in high school. Both sides are nervous. Neither side really knows what to do except what they’ve overheard from their not-much-more experienced older brothers and sisters.

So what should YOU do?

Well, you have to take charge of that awkward date.

I’ll talk about specific ways to do this in a little bonus report I’m preparing for the relaunch of my Upwork book. In case you want to get notified when this book is out, you can sign up here:

https://bejakovic.com/upwork-book-notification-list/

Top Gun II: Mystery Upwork Bogey

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The big news for me over the last week is that we finally have a trailer for Top Gun II: Maverick.

I don’t have high hopes.

The original Top Gun, which came out some 30 years ago, is my favorite movie of all time.

But I can’t imagine that today’s metoo Hollywood could make a worthy sequel to that hyper-chaddy, testosterone-dripping circle jerk.

Even so, I’m sure I’ll go see the movie when it comes out in 2020.

For today, I have the original Top Gun in mind.

Because a few days ago, I was talking to a a fellow freelance copywriter who lives in the fine city of Manchester.

He was asking what I thought of the recent changes on Upwork.

In a nutshell, freelancers now have to pay around $1 to apply for a job.

I’m not on Upwork any more, but if I were, I wouldn’t care about this.

Because of my “bogey.”

No, it’s not a MIG-29 that suddenly blipped up on the radar. Instead, a bogey in direct marketing is the maximum price you are willing to pay for a customer.

Let me give you an example:

Many summers ago, when I was starting out on Upwork, an average first-time client would net me around $200.

At the same time, I’d get on average 3 new clients from each 30 applications I sent in.

If my math is right, that means each targeted and smart application I submitted was effectively worth $20 in business for that month.

In other words, $20 was my “bogey.”

And so, if Upwork had been charging me $1 to apply to a job, it would basically be a no-brainer to keep applying to any jobs that I thought were a good fit.

And that’s not even counting knock-on effects such as repeat business, a plumper portfolio, spontaneous referrals, or awakening the Upwork recommendation algorithm.

So here’s my tip for you for today:

Whether you are on Upwork or you are after other clients or customers, it makes sense to calculate your bogey.

And if it’s at least as great as your cost of acquiring those customers or clients…

Then get in that dogfight and engage, Maverick.

By the way, I still haven’t put up my Upwork book for sale since taking it off Amazon. While it’s in the hangar, if you do have any Upwork questions, send me an email and I’ll help if I can.

Why I no longer wear my prices on my sleeve

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I learned a pricing lesson at the local market today.

This market is a large open terrace, with about 100 stalls, each of which is packed with similar goods:

Nectarines… watermelons… potatoes… lettuce… grapes… zucchini…

At each stall, a different fruit and vegetable peddler holds court.

I went up to one of these women today to buy arugula. But she was in the middle of a heated discussion. A customer had commented her cucumbers were expensive, so she was explaining all the reasons behind the price.

When the customer walked away, unimpressed, she turned to me, and continued her rant.

“Last week, I had a woman come and buy figs for 20 brass guilders. ‘Oh they are so expensive,’ she complained. The next day, I had no more figs. But I saw the same woman buying figs from the next stall over at 40 brass guilders! When I asked her about it, she said, ‘What can I do, I really love figs!'”

She paused to give me time to react. I had nothing to contribute. So she continued:

“That f****** mother of a c*** and snake w****! And she was complaining about my prices!”

Yep, my arugula peddler, pricing is a mystery. And you’ll never make everyone happy.

That’s why for a long time I simply wore my prices on my sleeve.

“7 emails? 900 silver florins. Take it or leave it.”

I had this attitude for a long while, and it served me well. But I’m slowly starting to change this policy.

Not because I want to start haggling with clients, or charging them 40 brass guilders when I would also do the work for just 20.

Instead, I’m trying to do away with prices altogether.

I’m starting to realize that, whether I am cheap or expensive, whether I deliver a great service or not, most clients will still see me as an item in the “expenses” column — even if my copy makes them good money.

That puts a cap on how much money I can make.

And it puts a cap on the kind of relationship I can have with clients.

That’s why I am maneuvering the services I offer out of the “expenses” column and into the “profits” column.

And if you too offer services or products in exchange for money, then this simple shift in thinking might create a breakthrough in your business.

Anyways, if you’re looking for some other breakthroughs in your business, specifically on the front end, before you’ve even converted somebody to buy your own brand of arugula, then you might like the following offer:

https://bejakovic.com/advertorials/

Fighting over Wimpy copywriting clients

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Here’s a bit of 1957 cartoon wisdom for beginner freelance copywriters:

It comes from a Popeye cartoon, in which Popeye has just opened up a shiny new diner.

But then, his archenemy Bluto pulls up with a fancy food truck right across the street.

“You gotta move that thing,” says Popeye.

“A little competition never hurt nobody,” barks Bluto.

They’re about to come to fisticuffs when a potential new customer strolls down the street.

It’s J. Wellington Wimpy, the penniless moocher who pretends to be high class.

Wimpy sits down at Bluto’s food truck. “I’ll have a hamburger, for which I will gladly pay you Tuesday,” says Wimpy in his aristocratic tone.

“One hamburger coming up!” says Bluto.

But then Popeye gets in there, and steals Wimpy away. “I’ll have a generous portion of baked beans, for which I will gladly pay you Tuesday,” says Wimpy again, except this time to Popeye.

“Baked beans, coming right up!” says Popeye.

The rest of the cartoon goes on like this, with Bluto and Popeye constantly sabotaging and one-upping each other.

They eventually get into a fight, throwing barrels, stovetops, pork legs, and cakes at each other.

Meanwhile Wimpy the moocher sits by and eats their food, never paying and never intending to pay.

Maybe you see why I bring this up.

It’s pretty similar to the situation a lot of beginner freelancers find themselves in.

They roll out the red carpet for Wimpy clients, who “will gladly pay Tuesday” but want the work done today.

They find themselves in under-bidding food fights with other freelancers who desperately want to attract the same fake-aristocrat moochers.

And when it all comes to nothing — and how could it not, with a Wimpy client — they have no alternative but to blame the competition.

It doesn’t have to be like this.

As I mentioned over the past coupla days, I’m putting together a group where I help newbie freelance copywriters to get successful.

If you’re interested in participating, all you gotta do is let me know.

You can send me an email, or throw a leg of pork my way.

Either way, I’ll follow up with you to see how your copy diner is cooking, and how I could help you run it better.

Unfair Upwork advantage

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In a couple of weeks, I’ll be getting off Upwork entirely.

Which is kind of a shame, because I’ve built up a lot of insight into how that platform works and how to win high-paying copywriting jobs there.

At the same time, I know that some of the people who read my blog are aspiring copywriters and would-be freelancers.

And so last night, I had an idea.

I imagined putting together a kind of group where I share what I’ve learned about succeeding on Upwork, and where I provide ongoing guidance to anyone who’s interested in doing the same. If you’re just starting out on Upwork, I feel like this would be an “unfair advantage” over everybody else on there.

Bad for them. Good for you.

But here’s the thing:

I haven’t decided yet whether I will actually create this group — or what form it will take.

If you’re not interested in any of this, no need to do anything.

But in case you are interested, simply write me an email and let me know.

If there is enough interest, I’ll follow up with you directly to see where you’re at and how I could structure this group to best help you.

How to slowly become an A-list copywriter

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Gary Bencivenga, who is often called the greatest living copywriter, didn’t start out so great.

In various places, he’s admitted that he was quite mediocre for a good number of years.

So how did Gary rise to the very top, and make himself millions of dollars in royalties and fees in the process?

Well, he got better.

Much better.

Very slowly.

In fact, one inspiring piece of advice from Gary B. is to simply make yourself 1% better as a copywriter every single week.

How to do this? Here are a few ideas, all of which I personally practice:

First, read. About marketing, copywriting, or persuasion. (Right now, I’m reading E. Haldeman-Julius’s The First 100 Million.)

Second, write. For clients, and for yourself.

Third, spy. Each day, read one successful sales letter for a few minutes. Spend another few minutes hand-copying some other ad.

Do all this every day,  and you can reasonably say you’re getting a 1% boost in your copywriting skills every week.

And here’s the thing:

1% a week compounds.

So at the end of the year, you aren’t just 52% better… you’re 68% better. At the end of 2 years, you’re 181% better. And at the end of 5 years, you become so valuable that the sun itself starts to melt and implode when it catches a glimpse of your skills.

Or not. But if you get 1% better each week, and you keep it up, you will eventually become one of the very best in this field.

But you do have to get started.

Because this compounding thing works best when you give it time. And every week you miss will cost you big a few years down the line.

And here’s one last tip:

If you’re fairly new to copywriting, it’s possible to get better much faster than 1% a week. I’d estimate about 1,000% in 60 days’ time.

Specifically, I’m thinking of CopyHour, a program which combines all 3 of the steps I’ve listed above.

In case this is something that interests you, better act fast. And not only because of compounding. Enrollment for CopyHour is currently open, but it will be closing at the end of this weekend. Here’s the link for more info:

​http://copyhour.com/​