A defensive Internet troll sets me straight

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Last night, while my Copy Riddles promo was still going on, I sent an email about a troll who chimed in to say Copy Riddles isn’t good enough for him.

He started by accusing me of name-dropping.

​​He ended by telling me to “go read some stuff from Settle, Tony Shepherd and Andre Chaperon.”

So I did. And I used what this guy wrote to illustrate Ben Settle’s idea that Internet trolls always project.

But no.

​​It turns out Ben and I are wrong about that. Or least that’s what my troll claims, in a message he sent me today:

Kind of sad when you think someone being critical of your emails is ‘a troll picking a fight’ with you. Most people would see that as an opportunity to examine, review and possibly improve. You get defensive and start making (bad) assumptions about someone you know NOTHING about.

1. I’m NOT the one dropping names, 2. I’m doing very well with my own sites and 3. I’m not interested in the new ‘shiny’ objects.

Why would you make assumptions like that?

You’ve written a book that may be the best copywriting book ever – but based on the way you’ve responded to me I doubt it.

PS: I’ve read ALL of Settle’s books. Copy Trolls is easily the worst. Read the Infotainment Book, there’s ideas in there you can use.

I’ve done enough unpaid promotion of Ben Settle’s ideas, so I won’t talk about infotainment today.

Instead, let me get back to what I really love to do. And that’s finding illustrations for deep persuasion, influence, and psychology ideas that I can share with you.

Today’s idea comes from neuroscientist V.S. Ramachandran.

At one point, Ramachandran studied people people who had suffered a stroke and were paralyzed in one arm. And yet, these people stubbornly refused to admit they were paralyzed.

This wasn’t just a brave face they were putting on in public.

They truly could not accept that their arm was hanging limp by their side, not responding to any command they gave it.

Ramachandran performed clever experiments to try to elicit whether these patients actually believed they were 100% fine.

The answer was yes. They themselves were convinced their arm was not paralyzed, in spite of the very obvious evidence otherwise.

So is this just a strange corner case in the medical literature… or something for the archives of Internet trolldom?

Ramachandran thinks it’s more than that.

He claims this is a dramatic and concrete illustration of the kind of thing we all engage in, all the time.

Denial, Ramachandran says, is a fundamental human activity. It’s how we manage to live in a complex and often nasty and brutish world, and still maintain an illusion of a coherent, in-control self.

I personally find this idea both terrifying and fascinating. Which of the things I know to be true are a flat-out denial of reality?

​​Or maybe, not even a flat-out denial, but something more complex?

Because flat-out denial (“I’m NOT the one dropping names”) was just one of the mechanisms Ramachandran came across in his paralyzed-but-no patients.

There were five other types as well. You can see a few more of these denial strategies in my troll’s response above.

​​But if you can’t spot them, don’t worry.

I’ll spell out the other five types of denial in my emails over the coming days. You can sign up here if you want to read that.

Like I said, I find this stuff personally fascinating. But it can be valuable, too.

It can help you understand other people better, whether those are your friends… family… customers… prospects… or trolls.

And of course, it can help you understand yourself better. And who knows. Maybe, one day, it can even be an opportunity to examine, review, and possibly improve.

Torture-free deadline for Copy Riddles is near

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Perhaps you don’t care that the deadline to sign up for Copy Riddles is approaching in a few hours. Such is the society we live in.

But it wasn’t always so. For example, Julius Caesar once wrote about a curious urgency tactic used by his enemies, the Gauls:

“By Gallic intertribal law all adult males are obligated to attend the muster under arms; and the last to come is tortured to death in sight of the host.”

Ah the good old days… when a deadline really meant something.

But again, we live in a modern and a civilized society. So the only torture I can inflict upon you is to say:

Come 12 midnight PST tonight (Sunday), I will close the doors to Copy Riddles.

And no amount of pleading about how your car was in the shop, or how the kids were sleeping, or how you only had cash on hand (all excuses I’ve gotten before) will make me crack those doors open a single inch.

​​Not until some uncertain future date, at least a few months down the line, when or if I decide to reopen Copy Riddles.

Again, perhaps you don’t care. But if you do, there’s still a bit of time. Here’s the link:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

A name-dropping Internet troll sets me up for a layup

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Over the past few days, I’ve been sending a lot of emails about Copy Riddles. It’s obviously wearing thin on a few sets of nerves, because I triggered the following response:

Hi,

You love to name-drop in these emails, Caples and Kennedy today, Halbert and others on other days.

But here’s the thing . . . all you’re doing is repeatedly trying to sell your ‘Riddles’ program. Those guys whose names you like to drop, do this MUCH better than you. In fact, if your program is no better than these emails then no thanks.

Go read some stuff from Settle, Tony Shepherd and Andre Chaperon. Lots to learn from these guys.

All right, since you asked for it… let me dig through my Ben Settle archives and see what Ben might have to teach me. Yep, there it is:

Over the years, several readers have observed how much I get an almost sadistic glee and excitement when trolls pick fights with me (besides profiting form them, they’re entertainment, more interesting than TV).

A few have even asked how I can possibly enjoy it so much and not get angry, etc.

My answer?

It’s easy to do when you realize they are really talking about themselves, and are simply projecting their miserable lives onto you.

For years now, Ben has been beating the drum about the fact that Internet trolls always project. And I’ve heard his message, loud and clear. So I can conclude my own troll above:

1. Loves to name-drop all the famous copywriters he knows about

2. Would like to take action (sell something, write copy) but is too afraid that everyone else is MUCH better than him

3. Routinely gets sucked into buying the next program that sounds sexy — “Lots to learn from these guys!” — instead of actually doing anything with all the info he has already bought

In case you’re wondering:

No, I haven’t yet graduated to feeling glee and excitement when a troll picks a fight with me.

But when a troll sets me up for a layup, like today, I feel it would be disrespectful to Ben, a guy I’ve learned a lot from over the years, not to profit from it.

But let me get back to trying to sell my ‘Riddles’ program.

The fact is, the whole point of Copy Riddles is that it’s based on a simple exercise. You write bullets based on source texts, and you get a chance to compare what you’ve written to what famous, name-droppable, A-list copywriters have written.

Yes, I also include a lot of guidance and my own interpretation of what exactly the A-listers are doing.

But you don’t have to like my writing to get value from Copy Riddles.

Because the biggest value in Copy Riddles comes from doing the exercise. Well, from doing the exercise… and then putting your new skills into some kind of real-life context, where they actually have a chance to make you money.

I doubt that will ever happen for my name-dropping troll above.

But perhaps you’re ready to do some actual work and then profit from it. If so, then you’ll want to know that enrollment for Copy Riddles closes later today, at 12 midnight PST.

To get in while the doors are still open:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

Two copywriting cowboys and a first draft

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This morning, I found myself, frown on my face, jaw clenched, staring out the window. I was actually stroking my chin, that’s how deep in unpleasant thought I was.

I was trying to come up with a way to start this email.

Finally, disgust swept over me. “Let me just write something, anything,” I said to myself. “In the worst case, it will be terrible. And I will just have to rewrite it.”

In case you’re starting to get a little nervous about where this email is going, let me ease your mind:

This isn’t me cowboy hollering at you to to git ‘er done.

Instead, I just want to remind you — and really, myself — of something I heard in an interview with Parris Lampropoulos.

Parris is one of the most successful copywriters working over the past few decades. He has something like an 80% success rate at defeating control sales letters. And he makes millions of dollars while working on only three or four projects a year.

Even so, Parris doesn’t produce winning copy straight out the gate.

In that interview, Parris said something like:

“When I first sit down and write the bullets for a promotion, I always think I’ve lost it. They’re terrible. Everybody will find out I’m a fraud. Then I rewrite the bullets once, and I think, maybe I will be able to get away with it. Third and fourth rewrite, they’re starting to look pretty damn good.”

So if somebody as successful, proven, established, revered, and experienced as P-Lamp still gets feelings of horror and doubt when he looks at his first draft… then maybe it’s okay if you and I also feel the same.

Or in the words of another A-list copywriter, Clayton Makepeace:

“Don’t compare YOUR first draft with MY 16th draft.”

“Thanks John,” you might say, “but I really don’t need encouragement to keep fiddling with my copy. I do that aplenty already.”

I feel you. I can revise my copy endlessly, moving a single word from place A to place B, and back again, over and over, a dozen times. There’s obviously a point at which it stops paying for itself.

But it’s good to still remind yourself that other people work the same way, including some of the best of the best. It can help you stay sane.

And just as important:

Reminding yourself of the power of rewrites can help you get going in the first place. Like what happened with me with this email you’re reading now.

So that’s all the cowboy hollering I have for you today. And now on to business:

I bring up both Parris and Clayton since they feature many times inside Copy Riddles.

That’s because both Parris and Clayton were a couple of the slowest — but most deadly — gunmen in the Wild West of sales copy. Here’s one of Parris’s bullets that wound:

“How to use an ordinary hairbrush to quit smoking.”

I discovered the secret to this (and many similar) brain-teasers by looking at Parris’s bullet… as well as the actual book he was selling.

The trick Parris used to write this bullet is simple. You can discover it in round 17 of Copy Riddles. Once you know it, you too can write intriguing stuff like this “hair brush” promise, on demand.

And then you can rewrite it… and rewrite it… and rewrite it some more. And slowly, it will start to look pretty damn good.

Anyways, enrollment for Copy Riddles closes tomorrow. So if you’ve got a hankering for some A-list copywriting skills, then pardner, head over here:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

The secret to writing subject lines with the word “secret” in them

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I’ll tell you about the subject line secret in just a second. But first, here are a few funny-if-fake headlines, supposedly written by legendary marketer Dan Kennedy:

Who Else Wants To Discover The Secret
To Writing Headlines
That Begin With The Words ‘Who Else’?

——

“Do You Have What It Takes
To Write Powerful Headlines
Which Have Quotation Marks
And Are In The Form Of A Question?”

——

Everybody Laughed When I Used
​An Old Headline Template To Create My Headline,
But When I Put It At The Top Of My Sales Letter…

In case it’s not clear, that last one is a play on John Caples’s famous ad, “They Laughed When I Bent Down To Pet The Cat… But When She Started To Hiss!”

Dan’s point was that there’s a lot more to copywriting than templates and formulas.

If it weren’t so, then businesses wouldn’t be willing to write obscene paychecks to A-list copywriters like Dan himself.

Why would they?

If templates and formulas were where it’s at… then businesses could just get any monkey with small, nimble fingers to stick “Who else wants” at the start of an uninspired or unbelievable promise… and they would still make all the sales they want.

This can either be good news or bad news, depending on your perspective.

It’s bad news because it means making money with sales copy is more involved than you might have been told at first.

It’s good news because it means there’s a natural moat around the high castle of good copywriters. And maybe more importantly…

It means copywriting can become a pursuit you can explore for a long time, and still find new and deep insights. At least that’s how it’s been for me.

But back to that secret I mentioned in the subject line.

If you want to learn how to write fascinating subject lines, rather than relying on the crutch of calling every can of tuna a “secret,” then you can learn that inside my Copy Riddles program.

Copy Riddles is built around the practice of writing sales bullets. And bullets just happen to double as great subject lines.

Also, you might like to know:

Copy Riddles is not in any way focused on bullet formulas and templates. In case you don’t believe me, here are a few relevant words from marketing consultant Khaled Maziad, who went through Copy Riddles last year:

Man, this is the best course on bullets I have ever seen. And believe me, I have seen a lot.

I loved that you didn’t include bullet templates but went deep into the psychology behind each bullet.

This course is not just about the “how-to” of writing bullets but understanding the artistry and the deep psychology behind them… Plus, when and where to use them.

It’s like going behind the scenes and watching David Copperfield reveals every single magic trick in the book… without losing interest.

So if you want to find out some magic tricks that make real money appear:

https://copyriddles.com

My ape-like positioning fail

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“With our millions of subscribers and your skills,” he wrote me, “I’m sure we can have a big win-win.”

Here’s a bit of revelation about my secret client life:

Over the past month and a half, I’ve been talking to a business owner named Abdul.

Abdul runs an 8-figure business selling online courses. He wanted to start a daily email newsletter to both influence and sell the thousands of new subscribers who join his list every day.

Abdul’s front-end copywriter, who happens to read my newsletter (hi Ross!) recommended me as the expert email copywriter for the job.

So Abdul and I talked and made a deal. It’s all being glued and assembled as we speak, and once it launches for real, we will see how big of a win-win it turns out to be.

But here’s where this story gets a little wobbly.

A few days ago, Abdul texted me to say he’s thinking of hiring Dan Ferrari to write the front-end copy for an upcoming course.

A bit of context:

Dan Ferrari is a copywriter with a long string of controls for both financial and health offers. And Dan has what you might call the Midas touch when it comes to direct response.

I know this because a few years ago, I was one of a handful of guys in Dan’s coaching group, and I could see it first hand.

So when Abdul texted me he’s thinking of hiring Dan, I wrote in response,

“If you do end up hiring him, tell him I’ll gladly work as his assistant, just for the experience.”

I wrote that. But I didn’t send it. Instead, my index finger lingered over the send button. I then slowly brought that finger to my lips, like a gorilla considering his next meal.

“Maybe it’s not a smart thing to say?” I asked myself, while looking at the bananas on my kitchen counter. “I mean, I’m supposed to be the expert copywriter here. How will it look if I offer to work as another copywriter’s assistant?”

I shrugged my powerful ape shoulders. And I clicked to send Abdul the message after all.

Result:
​​
I haven’t yet been fired. And who knows, maybe I’ll end up working with Dan and learning something new.

So my point, in case it’s not obvious:

As I’ve written before, there’s big value to positioning yourself as a wizard… standing on a tall cliff… and, in a booming voice, letting the world know you wield secret knowledge and mystical skills…

But there’s also value in being driven to get better at the actual wielding.

And if I have to choose between the two, like in the case above, I will personally choose the second. It might be the slower path to success. But it’s worked well for me over the long term.

I’m not sure whether this fact can benefit you also.

Perhaps it can make you feel better, if like me, you are also a little skill-hoarder.

Or maybe it can remind you there’s always more to learn, and that there’s usually long-term profit in doing so.

Either way, here’s a possibly related tip:

Two days ago, after I announced I’m reopening my Copy Riddles program, I had a bunch of people who already went through Copy Riddles ask to be added to this new run as well. (One of the perks is lifetime access.)

And I noticed something interesting.

​​Many of the people who want to go again were among the most engaged when they first went through Copy Riddles.

They were the ones who consistently participated in the weekly bullet contests… who attended Q&A calls… who asked thoughtful questions… and generally, who seemed to get the most out of the course.

And here they are again, ready for more. Maybe there’s something to it… something you can use for your own success also.

Or maybe not.

In any case, enrollment for Copy Riddles closes Sunday. If you’d like to find out more about it:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

DO NOT WRITE A CROCK OF SH—

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A few weeks ago, I shared a bit of writing advice from A-list screenwriter and playwright David Mamet.

For some reason, Mamet likes to use all caps when he’s giving out advice. So here’s another loud tip from Mamet, one he initially shouted at a bunch of junior writers working under him:

DO NOT WRITE A CROCK OF SHIT. WRITE A RIPPING THREE, FOUR, SEVEN MINUTE SCENE WHICH MOVES THE STORY ALONG, AND YOU CAN, VERY SOON, BUY A HOUSE IN BEL AIR AND HIRE SOMEONE TO LIVE THERE FOR YOU.

I’m sharing this motivational quote with you to address the most common question I get about Copy Riddles. That question is:

“Is Copy Riddles about how to write bullets specifically, or copy in general?”

The short answer is yes.

The slightly less short answer is Copy Riddles is about implanting core copywriting skills into your head. I’m talking about stuff you can’t do without if you write sales copy…

Like promises… proof… intrigue… and some of those dirty and hidden psychological tricks you may have seen insiders whispering about.

Really, there is only one fundamental part of copywriting that you can’t get through the Copy Riddles process.

That’s telling a story. And that’s why I included a special bonus along with Copy Riddles, titled Storytelling for Sales.

This bonus lays out my system for writing the stories in my “horror advertorials.”

Some of the horror advertorials I’ve written have sold millions of dollars worth of ecommerce products to cold Facebook traffic. And in this bonus, I tell you how I write the stories in these advertorials, which is the most important part.

But like I say, that’s a bonus. Because the fact is:

Once you have the fundamentals that Copy Riddles will implant in your head…

You can use them to WRITE A RIPPING HEADLINE, SUBJECT LINE, BULLET, OR SLICE OF BODY COPY WHICH MOVES THE SALE ALONG… AND YOU CAN, VERY SOON, BUY A HOUSE IN BEL AIR AND HIRE SOMEONE TO LIVE THERE FOR YOU.

In case that kind of power turns you on:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

How to get Joe Biden to send you (or your grandma) a birthday card

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Did you know that:

White House greetings for anniversaries of couples married at least 50 years or for birthdays of people at least 80 years old can be arranged. Send name, address and date of event six weeks in advance to: The White House, Attn: Greetings Office, Washington, DC 20502-0039. Free. www.whitehouse.gov/presidential-greeting

This new little fact lit up my brain when I first read. “I’ll be damned! Who knew?”

“Thanks for the tip,” you might say, “but so what?”

Well, so I can tell you the following personal fact, which might be relevant to you:

I first got interested in copywriting because of the promise of freedom and money.

But I managed to stick with copywriting for all these years — when I didn’t manage to stick with most other things for even a few weeks — because the actual work of copywriting caters to my nature.

The fact is, I am like a little ferret.

I’m a curious animal… I love to stick my nose into different things… and I get excited to find out I may in a few short decades be eligible to get a birthday card from the President.

And my point is:

There are many areas of life where none of this is any kind of asset. I mean, you don’t want your doctor, your financial advisor, or even your hair dresser to be easily distracted or addicted to novelty and surprise.

And yet, these things are definite assets if you are a copywriter.

So if you’re not a particularly curious person, then copywriting might prove to be a challenge and a slog, in spite of the other benefits.

On the other hand, if you are curious and a little ferret-like by nature, it can be a definite advantage in this business. It can lead you to success even if, like me, you’re not suited to much else.

But let’s get to business:

The White House factoid above is a sample of a source text at the heart of my Copy Riddles program.

Not all the source texts inside Copy Riddles are as novel or surprising as this one.

But still, many people who’ve gone through Copy Riddles have told me they enjoyed the source texts. Others said that besides getting copywriting skills into their heads, the Copy Riddles process was actually informative and fun.

​​Like copywriter Sonam Zahrt-Tenzin, who wrote:

CopyRiddles has absolutely lived up to my standards and far beyond.

It is helping me grow and understand the persuasive elements of copy on a level I didn’t anticipate being possible so soon. I would go as far as to say that I think most people should start learning about copywriting this way. I love how much thought you have put into your analyses and the solid examples that you tie theory back into.

(Also, the source texts are either informationally valuable by themselves or entertaining/amusing– so thank you for your good taste.)

It’s very kind of Sonam to say that, and it’s more boasting than I would usually do myself. So for the sake of good taste, let me wrap it up.

Copy Riddles is open for enrollment until this Sunday.

If you’re the curious type, and you’re curious for more info on Copy Riddles, then peek your little nose into the page below while there’s still time:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

Copy Riddles if you want ’em or not

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Today I’m reopening Copy Riddles for a few days.

This brief enrollment window will close this Sunday at 12 midnight PST. The actual Copy Riddles program will kick off next Monday, January 31, 2022.

If you are by chance already convinced that you want to join Copy Riddles, you can do that at the link below.

If you’re not convinced that you want to join Copy Riddles… or you don’t even know what Copy Riddles is… it might also be worth visiting link below.

Because that’s where I’ve laid out exactly what this program is. And I’ve built up my best case why Copy Riddles can quickly and pretty easily implant A-list copywriting skills into your head.

But perhaps you are certain you do not want to join Copy Riddles.

And perhaps you’re wondering where your lighthearted copywriting insight is for the day.

In that case, I’d like to tell you about the “super fun” tactic one elite copywriter has found to  keep his prospects reading past his lead… and ultimately buy. Yes, even in cases when his lead is a little weak.

If you’re curious about that, the answer is still to click the link below and read the page that appears.

So whether you’re highly aware… mildly unaware… or firmly opposed to the power and value of this program I call Copy Riddles… the only suggestion I have for you is to click below and take the next logical step:

https://bejakovic.com/cr

The power of sitting and not taking action

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Yesterday, I found myself reading a promising article titled:

“Buy Things, Not Experiences”

“Wow!” I said, as a gust of wind shook my window. “That’s the opposite of that tired phrase everybody’s always preaching, ‘Buy experiences, not things.'”

A little smile spread across my face. I couldn’t wait to see how the writer would pay off this shocking, denialist headline.

But woof, what a disappointment.

The article sounded like a speech prepared in 15 minutes by a high school debater. Three unrelated, undeveloped, unconvincing arguments. I won’t retell them here, but I’ll tell you the upshot:

The controversial headline got my attention. But the actual content didn’t make me want to read more by the same writer.

In fact, it put me on guard. In case I ever see another link to this guy’s content, I will think twice — Oh, that’s the high school debater, it’s probably not worth wasting my time.

That’s a fate I would like to avoid for the things that I write. Perhaps you want the same for yourself, too.

In that case, I can tell you a little secret which goes against much conventional wisdom in the marketing space:

There’s a lot of value in just sitting on things. Well, at least that’s what I’ve personally found.

For example, this newsletter. I don’t “execute” these emails fast. I don’t write at breakneck speed or jump on good ideas as they come to me.

Instead, I often get an idea for a subject line, topic, angle… and then it sits there, for days, weeks, sometimes months. I have things I wrote down two years ago which have still not matured.

But on occasion, something will click. A second good idea, or illustration, or whatever, will come my way. And I’ll remember — boy, this would go great with that other thing I thought of months ago.

Of course, it doesn’t always click. But in general, by sitting on ideas, like a mother goose on her eggs, I’ve written some of my most effective, interesting, and influential emails.

And maybe, you will find the same with your own writing. By sitting, and not taking action fast. In spite of that tired phrase everybody’s always preaching, “Money loves speed!”

But really, all this has just been a buildup to the thing I really wanted to show you.

Because a few weeks ago, I found a funny clip on YouTube. ​​It was part of a sketch show that ran on the BBC between 2006 and 2010.

​​All the clips I found from this show were clever and well-written, and they often had direct application to persuasion and influence.

Such as the clip I’m about to share with you.

It’s a satire of Richard Dawkins, looking for a new topic after his blockbuster book, The God Delusion.

Maybe you will enjoy the sketch. And maybe, it will give you some good ideas for controversial content that delivers… rather than disappoints. You can find it below.

But before you click to watch it, sign up for my email newsletter. Or don’t, and sit on it for a while. Here’s the video: