Personal Change

The success secret that successful people won’t tell you

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Today I want to tell you about the quarter game. Hypnotist Mike Mandel wrote about it a few days ago:

You imagine you will find a quarter somewhere today, as though it’s been left deliberately for you. And Mike says, more often than not, it turns out to be true.

Now, as you might have noticed, I’m a sucker for magic and magical thinking.

I mean, over the past month alone, I’ve sent emails about blindsight… the illusory nature of reality… my own tendency to see mystical significance in trivial events… and even a religious epiphany I experienced at age 20.

And here I am today, telling you to manifest quarters into your life.

I wish I could control myself better so I could look a little more serious and professional… and stop myself from morphing into the male, copywriting version of Rhonda Byrne, the Australian TV producer who made that movie The Secret.

But what to do? Here’s my story:

Yesterday, I went out for a walk. And I played the quarter game for the first time. I told myself I’d find a quarter, as though it had been left deliberately for me.

After a few minutes of walking around, I didn’t find a single quarter.

But then I told myself, “You know what, quarters are fine. But what would be really great is if I found that missing license plate.”

Because this past Sunday, I went to my car — actually, my mom’s 20-year-old white Audi, which I have been using for past six months — and I found the front license plate was gone.

This is a huuuge hassle.

Where I am right now (Croatia), it means I have to go to the police, report the license plate as missing, apply to get a whole new set, then update documents, insurance, the vehicle inspection. It’s such a pain in the ass that I have been ignoring it and instead just not using the car for the past few days.

That’s why it would have been great to “manifest” that license plate back into my life.

It would save me hours or days of sitting around in government offices, filling out paperwork, driving around town… or alternately, stressing that cops will pull me over and fine me and harass me if I don’t do all that.

So there I was yesterday, with the sudden idea to play the license plate game. And the darnedest thing happened.

Within five minutes, I had the missing license plate in my hand. I found it over a wall and down a ditch, in some bushes, close to where my car — well, my mom’s car — had been parked.

I’m not sure how the license plate got there. And I’m not sure exactly how I had the idea to check there.

All I know is that, had I not read Mike Mandel’s email… and had I not half-jokingly played the quarter game… I would not have thought to play the license plate game, or search for the license plate where I did find it. As though somebody had deliberately left it there for me.

But let me wrap this up. Here’s a quote from Eric Hoffer’s book True Believer, about the psychology of revolutions, religions, and other mass movements:

“The remarkable thing is that the successful, too, however much they pride themselves on their foresight, fortitude, thrift and other ‘sterling qualities,’ are at bottom convinced that their success is the result of a fortuitous combination of circumstances. The self-confidence of even the consistently successful is never absolute.”

Hoffer’s point is that people only attempt real change when they feel they have their hands on some “irresistible power.” And this irresistible power is almost always something outside themselves… or at least outside the limits they feel to be their own identity.

Such, it seems, is human psychology. You can fight it. Or you can work with it.

If you can work with it in a socially acceptable way, good for you.

But even if you end up at risk of looking like a male Rhonda Byrne, it’s still a pretty good deal to make.

Because if you just rely on your own “sterling qualities,” odds are you end up sitting around government offices for days… pulling your hair out… and cursing the stupidity and injustice of the world.

The alternative is to effect change in your life without all that stress. And all you have to do is believe — in magic if you have to — and play the game every day.

Last thing:

Every day, I write an email about copywriting, marketing, or woo-woo topics like manifesting quarters. If you’d like these emails to magically manifest themselves in your inbox each day, you can sign up here.

If they pirate, they pay attention

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Here’s a confession from a once-broke, today-very-rich Internet marketer:

I was living in an apartment that cost $250 a month.

And I had about a month’s worth of living expenses left.

So I couldn’t afford to shell out the $2k it cost to buy any of Dan’s courses.

So I did something I’m not very proud of these days – I went to the dark parts of the web and torrented his stuff.

I found his advanced sales letter course…

His Wealth Attraction course…

Lastly I downloaded his holy grail – Influential Writing – which in my mind is the greatest information marketing course ever made.

I went through all of these on repeat for months.

Anytime I was working, I’d be listening to a Dan Kennedy course.

Maybe you know who wrote this. It’s Justin Goff.

Justin wrote that email a couple years ago, the day the whole direct response world thought that Dan Kennedy had died.

Justin also thought Dan was dead. So he wrote an ode to Dan, and said Dan was his “greatest mentor.”

And I can believe it.

I can also believe that it was Dan’s stuff that helped Justin get successful. That without it, Justin might not have made it, at least not as quickly and as richly.

In the marketing world, it’s popular to say, “If they pay, they pay attention.”

It’s also popular to mock those who pirate, steal, and share paid content. Here’s a recent bit from Ben Settle on the matter:

These criminals all end up fetching peoples’ coffee or begging for change for a living eventually. Bums to the end. Irony is, if they spent half as much time working on themselves & a legit business as they do pirating products, they’d be multi-millionaires many times over.

Writing this makes good business sense for Ben.

But obviously, not everybody who pirates stuff winds up begging for change (see Justin above). And vice versa.

Many people who honestly pay for stuff get nothing from their purchase except the rush of handing over their money.

And in case you’re wondering what I’m getting at, let me tell you a personal story:

A few days ago, while surfin’ the Internet, I surfed upon a membership site that claims to have the recordings of the Influential Emails training I held last November.

I don’t know whether this site actually has a copy of the recordings and resources I shared with people after the training ended… or whether they just copied my sales page and are baiting people into handing over their credit cards.

And I don’t really care much to find out.

Because I feel I’ve done right by the people who paid to join me for Influential Emails. Those who joined me, who paid attention, and who end up implementing the ideas I revealed… will profit much more than what they paid me.

At the same time, I respect the fact that they gave me their money. That’s why I don’t entertain requests for free copies of my paid stuff… or even offer discounts on the current price.

But on the other hand, if there is somebody out there who does pirate my stuff… and ends up profiting from it also… well, I won’t set my hair on fire about it.

​​In fact, I imagine I will still somehow benefit from it, in some unseen or indirect way, somewhere down the line.

So my point for you is:

Pirate all you want.

No, wait, that’s not actually my point. My point is:

Pay attention to the good information out there, whether it’s available to you for free or whether you have to pay for it. And then — key point — put that information to work.

Or don’t. Because maybe you’re ok with fetching other people’s coffee. Of course, maybe that won’t happen to you.

In any case, let me make you a free offer right now:

My Copy Riddles program will be re-launching later this month. I’m trying to get a few more people to find out about it before it gets pirated and shared into oblivion.

And if you help me get the word out, I’ll give you something in return.

This free thing will only benefit you if you consume it… and then put it to work.

But if you do that, it could lead you to self-respect, ongoing client work, and thousands of dollars in your pocket. For the full details:

https://bejakovic.com/free-offer-niche-expert-cold-emails/

The old “Simon Lannister”: How to achieve the possible

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Simon flew through the finish line and immediately collapsed, face down on the track.

“You all right, Si?” It was his sister Margot, standing over him and holding a stopwatch.

Simon lay there on the ground, gasping for breath. “heave… heave… TIME? heave…”

“Oh right,” Margot said. She looked at the stopwatch. “Three minutes, 59.7 seconds. That seems good. Is that good?”

Simon kept heaving for breath, face flat on the ground. Gradually his hands curled into fists and his heaves turned into sobs. “I did it… I DID IT…”

Simon’s Jack Russell terrier, Sergeant, came over and sniffed his master’s feet. Sergeant followed the scent away into the grassy, wildflower-covered field in the middle of the track.

“I don’t mean to rush you Si,” Margot said, “but could you maybe hurry it up? We’ll be late for lunch. And you know how mum gets whenever we’re late.”

And that’s all the detail that’s been preserved about this historic event.

Because historians love to study and celebrate Roger Bannister, the first man to run the four-minute mile, back in 1954.

But practically nobody studies or even remembers Simon Lannister, the 34th man to run the four-minute mile, only a few years later, in 1958.

And I suspect it will be the same with me and my achievement yesterday.

Because yesterday, I got banned from r/copywriting.

The context is that over the past few days, I’ve been rewarding people who share links to my Copy Riddles optin page.

And that’s why Sonam Zahrt-Tenzin, a copywriter who’s already gone through the Copy Riddles program, put together a nice writeup of his experience and posted it on the r/copywriting subreddit.

But when I went to read it a few hours later, it was “[removed].” In fact, a post at the top of r/copywriting said any links to me and any of my stuff are now banned because there have been too many of them over the past few days.

You might think this is a failure but:

I’m grateful to Sonam and to all the other people who shared links to my site.

Like I said, I doubt history will remember our collective achievement in getting me banned from r/copywriting. I’m certainty not the first to break through that barrier — I believe that was Daniel Throssell, and probably other people after him.

Even so, it’s been an achievement for me. And I don’t mean that in a perverse, “good is bad, bad is good” sense.

I mean it in the sense that I’ve seen a nice bump in new subscribers over the past few days.

In fact, I saw a bump on top of that bump after the “banned” post appeared at the top of r/copywriting. And since that post is sitting there still, I’m guessing it will send a few more people to check out my site.

What’s more, I imagine this promo campaign will bring me knock-on benefits and name exposure, which will only be obvious in weeks and months to come.

That’s the achievement I’m happy about.

Now, as you might have noticed if you’ve been reading my emails for a while, I’m not a person who particularly craves attention, controversy, or conflict.

But the fact is, if you do anything in life… besides drumming your fingers on the table and watching the seasons change outside your window… then soon enough, you will run into resistance, whether internal or external.

In my experience, the only thing to do at that point is to give it the old Simon Lannister:

Keep putting one foot in front of the other, if for no other reason than that you’ve set your mind to it. And once you’re done, pick yourself up from the track, and rather than dwelling on your achievement or the resistance you encountered, go get lunch, and then move on to the next goal in your life.

For example:

Even though Daniel was the first to get banned from many choice locations on the Internet… I’m sure other virgin forums, groups, and communities remain.

So if you’d like to help me get the word out about this newsletter, and possibly get banned somewhere new, then take a look at the link below.

I’m offering a bribe in exchange for your help. But if the bribe doesn’t turn you on, ignore it. And if you want to help me out just for the sake of helping me out, I’ll be grateful to you. Here are the full details:

https://bejakovic.com/free-offer-niche-expert-cold-emails/

Boiler rooms in Tirana

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A couple weeks ago I was in Tirana, Albania. I got to talking with one of the locals and it turned out he works in a boiler room.

“We do forex,” he explained. “We invest their money for them. Actually, we just take their money.” He shrugged. “Which country are you from?”

“Croatia,” I said.

“Ah. We don’t have any clients there. But Germany, Italy, France, Poland, Hungary — yes. I manage the sales team for the Hungarian market. It’s a very good market.”

I couldn’t believe it. “You have a team here of Hungarian forex sales people?”

“No no, all Albanians,” he said. “They learn a few phrases in Hungarian, the rest is in English. But it’s ok. These lawyers and doctors we call all speak good English.”

“Greed is universal,” I said to myself. “But how do you know who to call? How do you get their number?”

He looked at me like I’m an idiot. “They see an ad on the Internet. They click. They fill out the form with their info. Then one of our sales guys calls them. Then they give us all their money.”

Now I’m not an expert on boiler room tactics. But from what I know, it sounds like the same stuff that worked in 1972 works still in 2022. It’s just that the base of operations shifted from Chicago and Jersey City to other, less regulated locations like Tirana.

But the same system continues to work.

Of course, you don’t have to be a scammer. This basic funnel works even if you’re selling a legit, high-ticket offer, which can genuinely benefit your customers or clients. The sales system doesn’t care what you’re selling.

And equally as of course, this is not the only way to sell.

For example, the type of daily emails I write. Very hot right now. Many businesses want to do something similar. The promise is that you can build a relationship with your marketplace… without hard-selling… and instead, based on trust, influence, and personality.

Which is all true. But it ain’t new.

It goes back to Matt Furey… who probably got it from Dan Kennedy, who was sending weekly faxes, very similar in tone and content to what you’re reading now, but 20 and 30 years ago.

And if you asked Dan — if you could get him on the fax — I’m sure he would say that what he was doing then wasn’t new either. Somebody in the 70s and 50s and probably 1920s was probably doing the same long-form, personality-infused, frequent-contact marketing — just in a slightly different format.

So my point for you is that there’s a lot of value in knowing the history of your industry. Don’t be a scammer — I’m not advising that. But there’s almost nothing new under the sun, and it pays to know what came before you.

Which brings me to my offer, in case you didn’t take me up on it yesterday.

It’s to get a free copy of my Niche Expert Cold Emails training.

Because in my early days of working as a freelance copywriter, I hit upon two cold emails that got me client work.

​​Both of them were different from other cold email techniques out there. But I doubt they were truly new.

​​Had I been a better student, I probably would have found these ideas sooner, instead of having to wait to discover them on my own.

Whatever. You can do better than I did. Take advantage of my experience instead of fumbling around in the dark. Especially now that it’s free — well, free in money terms. For the full details:

https://bejakovic.com/free-offer-niche-expert-cold-emails/

Rescuing the Dread Pirate Roberts from a creative shipwreck

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“There will be no survivors… my men are here, and I am here… but soon, you will not be here…”

Here’s a little riddle for you:

How do three men, one of whom has been mostly dead all day long, storm a castle gate guarded by 60 soldiers?

Inconceivable, right?

​​Even if one of the three men happens to be a giant, and another a master swordsman… the enemies are too many. Success is inconceivable.

But what if you also throw in a wheelbarrow among your assets? And what if you even have a magical, fire-protective, “holocaust cloak”?

Suddenly, the inconceivable becomes easy. Because here’s what you do:

Just load one of the three men — preferably, the giant — into the wheelbarrow. Wrap the holocaust cloak around him.

Then start rolling the wheelbarrow towards the gate… and have the giant yell death threats at the soldiers as you approach.

Finally, just as fear and doubt start to creep into the hearts of the castle defenders… set the holocaust cloak on fire. Have your burning giant yell:

“The Dread Pirate Roberts takes no survivors… all your worst nightmares are about to come true… the Dread Pirate Roberts is here for your souls…”

Presto. The soldiers scatter in a panic, and you have taken the castle.

Perhaps you recognize this as a scene from the 1987 movie The Princess Bride, written by William Goldman.

But perhaps you also recognize it as something else, written by me in 2021.

Because about a month ago, I wrote an email about pirates. In that email, I was re-telling another scene from another William Goldman script, titled Sea Kings. That other scene had many of the same elements as the scene above:

First, a giant all-black figure who appears on the horizon at dusk, and who keeps floating nearer and nearer…

Then, the deep voice rumbling out from the figure… “Death or surrender… surrender or die… the Devil bids you choose…”

And finally, smoke and flames that erupt from around that black giant… to truly identify the legendary pirate you’re meeting face to face:

“Run up the white flag… It’s Blackbeard…”

It turns out Goldman reused a bunch of elements from Sea Kings (written some time in the 70s, never produced) to The Princess Bride (written some time later in the 70s, produced into a movie in 1987, became a giant hit and a big cultural icon).

The bigger point is that if you write a lot, you will eventually come up with a good idea, phrase, joke, motif, trick, transition, or image… which is part of a big creative shipwreck.

​​​Maybe that’s a book you never got published… or a video you made that nobody ever watched… or a daily email that ran too long and failed to make a clear point.

So why not reuse that good element a second, or a third, or a fifth time? In the right context, that rescued element might become highly influential, even though it was part of a disaster initially.

Take my email today, for example.

I hope you liked it. But maybe you didn’t.

If so, would you like me to try again?

As you wish. I’ll try again tomorrow, by rescuing an element of the copy I used today… and fitting it to a new purpose and a different format.

Good night, dear reader. Good work. Sleep well. I’ll most likely write you an email in the morning.

Great re-reads

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“The richer part of the promises you’ll make is the part that pulls the strings from behind the curtain. Friendship and status among your peers. Confidence and freedom from worry. Inclusion. Safety and security. Even just the feeling of association to people you admire and respect.”
– Michael Masterson and John Forde, Great Leads

I’m re-reading Great Leads right now. It’s my third time around reading and taking notes from this book. Even so, last night, I was shocked to read that passage above. It felt like I’d never seen it before. Which means…

1) This passage was secretly inserted into the book since I last read it (very unlikely) or…

2) My eyes carelessly skipped it the two times before (somewhat unlikely) or…

3) I was daydreaming both times while reading it (somewhat likely) or…

4) At those earlier times, I just didn’t grasp the deep significance of what I was reading (very likely).

In fact, my brain might have glossed over this passage even this third time.

​​Probably, the only reason I was finally able to see it is because I was writing about the same stuff only a few days ago. (If you’re curious, check out my emails from Dec 31 and Dec 29.)

So my point is that there is much value in re-reading books, and then re-reading them some more. And not just because you might be forgetful… dull of understanding… or careless the first few times around.

The way I think of it:

The ideas in a book, and the presentation of those ideas, are like seeds. And your mind while you’re reading, and the circumstances of your life at that time, are the soil in which those seeds can land. And for each seed, there is a different season for fruitful sowing.

In other words, if you revisit a good book, even one you’re sure you know well, the harvest can be bountiful. You can find good ideas that you couldn’t appreciate earlier. Or you can remind yourself of good ideas you had seen before, so they become a deeper core of who you are.

In this way, re-reading good books can create transformative changes in your life and business. Because many valuable ideas are simple. You just need to be reminded to apply them, and results will follow soon.

But maybe you knew all that already. And maybe by telling you this, I’m just making you feel a little guilty, instead of actually motivating you.

So let me tell you that in my experience, re-reading books is actually fun and exciting. You discover stuff, like that passage above, that couldn’t have been in the book before.

Re-reading good books also gives you confidence and satisfaction. You are following the advice of industry giants like David Deutsch, Ben Settle, and Parris Lampropoulos… so you know you are building a valuable habit.

And rereading books can even make you feel a little smug and superior — in a perfectly healthy way — compared to both your earlier self and to all those other people who aren’t willing to do this.

But do as you think is right.

Maybe you really are too smart to get value out of a second or third re-reading of a book.

But if you are not, then I’d like to talk to you. Because I feel like we might be kindred spirits.

So if you already have this habit, or if you’re planning on starting it now, write in and let me know. I’ll tell you a few of the best books, both persuasion and non-persuasion related, that I’m re-reading now and will be re-reading soon.

And by the way, if you’re puzzled by why I would tell you all this, you clearly need to re-read Great Leads. It’s right there on page 83, before the analysis of Vic Schwab’s How To Win Friends & Influence People ad.

But if by some cruel twist of fate you don’t have your own copy to reach for, here’s a very smart way to invest $11.42:

https://bejakovic.com/great-leads

My menage a trois with a jilted old ex

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In spite of my subject line above, there’s nothing lurid about today’s email. So if you are expecting sex and drama, it might be best to stop reading now.

On the other hand, if you’re in that small minority of people who get all hot and bothered by personal development topics, then it might be worth pressing on.

If you’re still with me, then let me set the scene.

Two years ago to the day, I wrote an email with the subject line:

“Why goals and I broke up and are no longer talking”

In that email, I wrote about how I’m ghosting goals. They never worked for me.

Instead, I decided to move on to a new relationship with what James Altucher calls “having a theme.” It’s a general direction you want your life to move in, without specifics, numbers, or deadlines.

Then exactly a year ago, I wrote an update with the subject line,

“2021 un-goals”

In that email, I gushed that my new relationship with themes was going great and was getting serious. I had moved forward significantly in each of the three themes/directions I had set for 2020.

But was this just the happy honeymoon period? Or would my new love affair last?

As I wrote a year ago, there was only one way to find out. Back then, I decided on three new themes for 2021, and I promised to write an update when the time comes.

Well the time is now.

So if you’re curious, I’ll tell you about my past year, and and how my relationship with themes developed. And maybe more importantly…

I will also tell you the fundamental mental shortcut I use to decide on many of life’s difficult questions. It might give you a new perspective on some important topics.

First the update. Here are the three themes I had for 2021:

1 Partnership. In a nutshell, I decided to stop doing everything myself. Instead, I wanted to partner up with other people and businesses… contribute what skills and resources I have in abundance… and let them do the same.

Without getting bogged down in details, let me say I got all the partnership opportunities I could want. And none of them led anywhere.

But I ended the year with a new partnership agreement — something that has the potential to be big. I’ll write more about that in the coming weeks and months.

2. Ability to produce. This is Dan Kennedy’s idea, which I heard via Ben Settle, that the only security you have in life is your ability to produce. As for my ability to produce in 2021:

I wrote 365+ of these daily emails… ​I created the 8-week Copy Riddles program… ​I held the Influential Emails training…

… ​​and that’s along with various bonuses I recorded and a few podcast appearances I made and a mastermind coaching I did. ​​Plus there was client work for 2 primary clients and a few odd jobs, here and there.

3. Redacted for being too personal and revealing. I seem to be building an online reputation as a hermit who’s afraid of divulging personal details. So I can’t disappoint you by sharing too much about my real life right now. Let me just say this third theme/direction was personal and went absolutely nowhere. In fact, it went backwards. A complete failure.

So to sum up:

Like with every other relationship I’ve ever had, year two of going steady with themes turned out to be a mixed bag. A few great moments… a few bitter fights… and a lot in between.

Which leads me to that mental shortcut I mentioned, or rather, a lens through which I view the world. Before I reveal it, let me warn you:

This is not something that sells very well. You won’t hear me preaching it for the rest of the year. But I believe it to be true, and since today is January 1, I am willing to admit to it. It is this:

Long-standing questions don’t have simple answers.

For me, this applies to many areas of life. But specifically, it applies when trying to decide which path is the right one:

Is it better to be flexible or disciplined?

Does real success come from self-acceptance or self-development?

Is freedom the greatest good or is it comfort and safety?

My brain wants simple, black-and-white answers to these questions. It would save me so much thinking.

But the truth is that deciding between these opposite poles is an ongoing struggle. It requires attention, effort, and care. And ironically, by accepting that fact, I often save myself a lot of grief and wasted time.

And this brings me to 2022, and that menage-a-trois I mentioned in the subject line.

Themes and I continue our relationship. We are trying to make things work.

But I’ve invited that old jilted ex, goals, back into my life. I want to see if somehow the three of us can live happily together.

So I have three new, general themes for my 2022… and I’ve also set two specific, quantifiable, deadline-based goals.

Will this polygamous relationship work out? Or will it end in plates being thrown and my clothes getting tossed out the window? And what exactly are my themes and goals for 2022?

Only one way to find out:

Like I did on January 1 2020… and January 1 2021… and now, today… I will write another email in a year’s time about this personal topic. And if you can wait that long, sign up for my email newsletter, and you will find out the whole story then.

Well, except for any revealing, personal info. That will have to be redacted. I have my hermit persona to protect and develop, after all.

Breaking the code of the highly successful person

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The sun is shining, I have an egg sandwich and a bottle of water for the road, and I’m ready to get in the car and drive across three countries in about as many hours.

But before I can do that, I have to finish this email and two more things. And that’s my point for you for today.

I recently read Dan Kennedy’s No B.S. Time Management For Entrepreneurs.

​​I long resisted doing so because the very words “time management” sound repulsive to me, a throwback to the time of Fred Flintstone slaving away at the rock quarry until the foreman yanks the pterodactyl’s tail to signal the end of the work day.

But boy was I wrong.

Dan Kennedy’s book is fantastic. I recommend it to anyone who is a driven go-getter (it will help you focus and get more done) or, like me, a lazy layabout by nature (it will still help you focus and get more done).

Anyways, towards the end of the book, Dan quotes a bit of wisdom he heard in his young days from success speaker Jim Rohn.

Dan says that, for him, this bit of wisdom broke the code of the highly successful person. It took all the mystery and mystique away. And here it is:

When you look closely at highly successful people in any field, you walk away saying to yourself, “Well it’s no wonder he’s doing so well. Look at everything he does.”

That’s what Jim Rohn used to say. To which, Dan Kennedy adds, “… and look very closely at the one thing or two or three things he gets done without fail, every single day.”

So there you go. My point for you for today. Figure out one or two or three things you will get done each day, without fail.

Perhaps you’re curious what my “without fail” things are.

Like I said, this email is one. Another, which i started only recently, is working on a new offer. And the third, which I’ve been practicing for most of my life, is reading. Because reading is really the fuel that drives any achievements I’ve had.

I’m not telling you to pick up these specific daily habits. Make your own choices.

​​But if reading is something you want to do every day, both for your sanity and for your success, then, again, I can recommend Dan Kenendy’s Time Management book. It’s a smart investment right now, because it will pay so much in time dividends tomorrow.

In case you want to check it out, you can find the Amazon link below:
​
https://bejakovic.com/time-management​​

Blessed are the proud

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“No man succeeds in everything he undertakes. In that sense we are all failures. The great point is not to fail in ordering and sustaining the effort of our life. In this matter vanity is what leads us astray. It hurries us into situations from which we must come out damaged; whereas pride is our safeguard, by the reserve it imposes on the choice of our endeavour as much by the virtue of its sustaining power.”
— Joseph Conrad, The Duellists

Here’s one thing that’s kept me interested in direct response copywriting for so long:

The best sales letters are not really selling what they seem to be selling on the surface. So they are not really about 100x stock gains… or getting your ex back… or ways to travel free on luxury cruise ships.

Rather, they are about being a man of vision… or being a man with a hole that nothing can fill… or being a man who knows others are always plotting behind his back.

That’s why the seven deadly sins and their offshoots are so powerful to think about when you write copy.

And even though I’ve thought about this quite a bit, I always thought that the two most powerful human failings — vanity and pride — are overlapping or even synonymous.

The passage I quoted above was the first time I heard anyone make a distinction between vanity and pride. The passage even puts them in opposition.

This made me think what the difference between pride and vanity might be. After some thinking, here’s what I’ve come up with:

Pride – the internal belief in your own worth or superiority

Vanity – the desire for others to acknowledge your worth or superiority

So for example:

If, as in the Conrad story above, an old soldier enters a woods with two loaded pistols, with the intent to kill or be killed by his opponent, according to the norms of civilized, honor-bound men…

Then pride is doing it to prove to himself his courage and his greater skill than the opponent. It doesn’t matter at all if nobody else will see it or know it.

But vanity is doing it so others will witness and acknowledge his courage and his greater skill. The audience is the whole point. If nobody sees it, the victory itself means nothing, or is worse than that — a wasted opportunity.

So pride and vanity are really two fundamentally different human drives, and I suspect, motivate different types of people.

At least that’s my interpretation. It might be relevant to you for two reasons:

One are those pesky hidden motives that underlie so many purchasing decisions. Again, it’s not really about the stock returns, the toxin-free pots and pans, or the better golf score.

Instead, it’s about vain status-seeking and wounded self-respect. Understanding these things, and having a good name to attach to them, can help you when it’s time to write breakthrough copy.

The other thing is something I’m personally curious about:

Why we put so much emphasis as a society, at least historically, on the evils of pride. Pride is even supposed to be the head of all the deadly sins, from which all the others spring.

Which brings me to one of my “competitors” I mentioned yesterday.

He might have something to tell you about why our society says pride is so bad.

The man’s name is Jason Leister. He started out as a direct response copywriter. He then wrote daily emails for years about clients and why they suck and how copywriters can cope with that fact.

But gradually, Jason drifted off into new and uncharted waters.

He now lives somewhere off the grid with his wife and ten kids.

And he’s stopped writing about copywriting and clients.

Instead, he writes about… well, check it out at the link below. That’s where you can sign up to get on Jason’s email newsletter and get Jason’s lead magnet, “How the World System Was Constructed to Make You a Slave and What You Can Do About It.”

You might find Jason’s ideas repulsive, conspiratorial, or like me, intriguing and sometimes enlightening. If you want to check them out, here’s the link:

https://sovereignbusiness.org/

Things “worthy of compliment” in 12 of my competitors

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I recently finished reading a book called NLP about NLP by two NLP experts, Steve Andreas and Charles Faulkner.

I’m interested in somehow patching a few Y2K-sized bugs in my own brain software, and so this kind of neural programming stuff is right up my alley and then through a little door.

Anyways, at one point in the book, Andreas and Faulkner advise the following:

“Find what’s worthy of compliment in your competition. Since you have been encouraging yourself to be complimentary to others, your senses have been opened and relaxed. You will have undoubtedly found yourself acquiring the skills of others without directly concentrating on them.”

Too easy? Who knows. I decided to try it out.

But then right at the start, I hit a snag. I had trouble coming up with my “competition.”

There’s nobody I really think of in that way. That’s the whole point of writing daily emails and creating unique offers like Copy Riddles.

But ok — ultimately, I am competing for people’s attention, for space in their inbox, for their hearts and minds, and possibly for their learning and growth dollars.

So I made a list of 12 such competitors. They all either write daily emails or have something to do with direct marketing.

For each competitor, I listed the first thing that came to mind — stuff they do, which I admire.

​​It turned out to be a surprisingly fun and eye-opening exercise. I suggest it to you — whether you’re a business owner, marketer, or freelancer.

Perhaps you’re curious about my list. You can find it below, with the names stripped out. After all, my goal today isn’t to name drop in bulk or to call people out.

But perhaps you can still guess who I have in mind — all are people I’ve mentioned previously in my newsletter. And here’s what’s worthy of compliment in each:

1. Willingness to get on camera regularly in spite of having the charisma of a typical copywriter
2. Community management
​3. High-priced offers
​4. A business built around a single core product that’s been running for years
​5. Emotional copy in spite of being very emotionally flat as a person
​6. Personality-based emails
​7. Writing fast
8. Surprising historical anecdotes
9. List building
10. Self-aggrandizement
11. A deep trove of personal experience and interests
​12. A really unique viewpoint

If you’re in the marketing and copywriting space, all these people will probably be familiar to you.

​​Except perhaps #8. He is well-known, but is not in the marketing space.

A​nd #12. He was once a direct marketer, but is today something… not quite definable. If you’re curious, I’ll tell you more about him, including his name, in my email tomorrow. You can sign up here to read that.