Playboy

The Playboy cartoon of A-list marketing truth

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When I was 12 years old, I had an accidental run-in with my first-ever, real-world copy of a Playboy magazine.

Along with the usual titillating stuff, all of which I’ve forgotten, I saw a cartoon that’s stuck with me for years. It had three panels:

Panel one showed a guy at the office, sitting at his desk, looking over a bunch of papers. But a thought bubble above his head showed what he was really thinking about:

​​Being out on the golf course.

Panel two showed the same guy at the golf course, about to take a swing. But there was a thought bubble above his head again.

​​Now, he was really thinking about being at home and having sex with his wife.

And maybe you can guess panel three.

It showed the same guy in bed with his wife. And the thought bubble was there also.

​​It showed — of course, the papers back on the desk at the office.

A few weeks ago, I wrote an email about how the best DM sales copy is not selling what it appears to be selling on the surface.

So financial copy is not really selling stock gains… but a feeling of vision and foresight.

And Boardroom’s Big Bastard Book of Secrets is not really selling clever ways to save on car insurance. Instead, it’s selling clever ways to feel smarter than your neighbor.

For a while, I wondered if there is one deep need that could be made to fit all sales letters in all markets.

One option is something that A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos said once. Parris said that, once you ask the “so what” question enough times about any feature or promise… the ultimate benefit always turns out to be, “So I can feel better about myself.”

So that’s one option.

Option two is not to worry about going deep. Instead, just keep the Playboy cartoon above in mind. And just subtly suggest something other than what’s on your prospect’s mind at the moment.

For example, all bizopp offers are upfront about selling big money now. But more subtly, many also suggest a new level of attractiveness that money will make possible.

On the other hand, pickup gurus are directly selling a new level of attractiveness. But on a deeper level, many also suggest the self-acceptance that will come from success with women.

And finally, many meditation programs are selling instant self-acceptance. But on a deeper level — and not even very deep — they are also promising the money that more self-acceptance will bring.

And so it goes, like a kitten chasing its tail. As another A-list copywriter, Gary Bencivenga, said once, “Desires are infinite in variety… and desires are replaced as soon as they are fulfilled.”

So there you go:

Remember the Playboy cartoon above. And you will have a subtle new spell hidden under your wizard’s cloak, which you can cast whenever you want to make money appear out of thin air.

But perhaps you don’t want money out of thin air. Perhaps you just want a spell to drive away doubt and career insecurity, on demand.

Right now, the closest I can give you to that spell is my Niche Expert Cold Emails training. It’s my bribe in case you help me get the word out about this newsletter.

By the way, this promo event I’m running seems to be close to saturating the copywriting world with links to my site. So I won’t keep it going for much longer.

But in case you’re interested in still joining while the joining’s good, here are the details:

https://bejakovic.com/free-offer-niche-expert-cold-emails/

Being authentic is overrated

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In 1976, David Bowie got accused of supporting fascism. How could anybody say that of Bowie?

After all, a few years earlier, Bowie claimed he was gay. Then he was an alien. Then he became one of the few white singers to perform on Soul Train.

This certainly doesn’t sound like your typical fascist. Why would anybody think different? Well, there is the following quote:

“I believe very strongly in fascism,” Bowie said in a 1976 interview with Playboy magazine. “Rock stars are fascists, too. Adolf Hitler was one of the first rock stars.”

People are always telling you, be authentic, be authentic. That’s how you will connect to others. Share your geeky stories. Be vulnerable. Be true to yourself.

And yet there’s David Bowie, who became a huge star by striving to be plastic, artificial, and impossible to pin down. He made up stuff and he lied for his own amusement and profit. He provoked and played the media. Bowie again:

“The only thing that shocks now is an extreme. Like me running my mouth off, jacking myself off. Unless you do that, nobody will pay attention to you. Not for long. You have to hit them on the head.”

And it’s not just Bowie or his rock star spawn like Madonna and Lady Gaga who get away with this. Look at the world of online marketing.

​​Ben Settle has admitted he consciously plays up his crotchety persona online. ​​Matt Stone has an oversexed alter ego he writes under, named Buck Flogging. The greatest copywriter of all time, Ross Manly, is not even a real person.

Fact is, authenticity is overrated. It’s much better to be entertaining, or at least interesting. If you are boring or unpleasant by nature, there’s no need to push that pollution out into the world.

​​Rather than being consistent with your “authentic self,” assume a new, more exciting viewpoint and unflinchingly defend it — for as long as you find it amusing or valuable to do so. ​​As Bowie put it:

“The only way I can be effective as a person is to be this confoundedly arrogant and forthright with my point of view. […] Nothing matters except whatever it is I’m doing at the moment. I can’t keep track of everything I say. I don’t give a shit. I can’t even remember how much I believe and how much I don’t believe. The point is to grow into the person you grow into. I haven’t a clue where I’m gonna be in a year.”

Email newsletter. I have one. Every day I write an email and share ideas that are not consistent with each other. But you might find it interesting anyhow. It’s available here.