The hidden structure of the best bullets. 2 parts needed. Here’s how you could have gotten both

Over the past few weeks, while looking over dozens of bullets written by A-list copywriters, I realized the best bullets have a hidden 2-part structure.

I think being aware of this can help anyone write more powerful bullets… and become a top-tier copywriter in general.

For example, one bullet by Parris Lampropoulos that had this structure was so powerful it became the headline for Parris’s entire promotion. And the promotion went on to beat the control.

I covered both parts of this hidden structure in today’s lesson of my bullets course. You could have gotten that lesson for free, had you been signed up.

But it’s still not too late. Because I’ll be covering other bullet topics in the coming days… including special cases of both of those “hidden structure” parts.

In case you’d like more info about my bullet course, or even to sign up, here’s where to go:

https://bejakovic.com/bullets-signup/

Bullets course

Two days ago, I wrote a post about a copywriting lesson milked from a Parris Lampropoulos bullet.

After writing up a few more of those lessons based on a few more bullets, I realized this stuff is too valuable to just cast out into the ether, to people who might not value it.

Don’t worry. I’m still willing to share these lessons with you.

But I’ve decided to create a little mini course around them. The course is free if you sign up for it now.

How it works is you will get an email from me every day.

Each email will talk about a copywriting lessons I’ve figured out by comparing the flour, eggs, and milk in the source material (the book or course for sale) to the crisp and shiny pastries that are the finished bullets in the sales copy.

The course will kick off tomorrow, and will run for 7-14 days, or however long it takes me to get tired of it.

If you want to opt in, you just have to fill out the form at the link below. But a warning to ye:

This course is going out live. In other words, it won’t be on autoresponder.

You can join it whenever you like, including later, and you will still get any remaining lessons I haven’t sent out.

But I won’t send you any bullet lessons you’ve missed. Because the idea is to take all this and package it up into a book or a course down the line. So if you don’t like to get it for free now, perhaps you will like to support me later.

Again, we start tomorrow, with what you should never, omit from your bullet. Never. Here’s the link in case you want it:

https://bejakovic.com/bullets-signup

Surprise! How to make your copy more appealing by saying less

Back in the 90s, A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos wrote a control for a Boardroom book called Tax Loopholes. One of the bullets in that control read:

“Surprise! Choosing the wrong private school for your child can cost you a bundle in tax breaks. What to do on page 90.”

I found the actual Tax Loopholes book online. And here’s what it says on page 90:

“If you send your child to a special school for psychological reasons, be sure to choose the right school. Otherwise your medical deduction could be disallowed. Recent case: A psychiatrist recommended that a child attend a boarding school. The IRS refused to allow the parent to take a medical deduction because the school was not a “special” school, and the curriculum didn’t deal with the child’s problem in any way.”

So how did Parris get from the source material (boring, unsexy) to the bullet (intriguing, sexy)?

Let’s take it step by step. If I had to summarize what it says in the book, I might say something like:

“The trouble is you can send your kid to a boarding school for a medical reason thinking you can get a tax break, but it ends up disallowed because it’s not the right kind of school”

There’s one big problem with this. And that’s that very few people are thinking of sending their kids to a boarding school for a medical reason.

So now the clever thing that Parris did becomes obvious.

Because if your appeal is very specific and limited, you can broaden it simply by generalizing and omitting stuff.

That’s how a boarding school (specific and fairly rare) becomes a private school (general and pretty common)…and that’s how the mention of the medical deduction simply disappears. Now our basic-bitch summary becomes:

“You can send your kid to a private school thinking you can get a tax break, but it ends up disallowed because it’s not the right kind of school.”​​

(This is already pretty close to what Parris’s bullet says. Beyond this one insight, it’s mostly a matter of tightening up the copy.)

Now here’s why this trick is so valuable:

This generalization/omission sleight-of-hand doesn’t just apply to writing bullets. It’s something you can do in all your copy if your initial appeal is too narrow. As Parris said once (I’m quoting from memory):

“Ask yourself, does it help my case, does it hurt my case, or is it neutral? If it hurts your case or it’s neutral, take it out. Only keep it in if it helps your case.”

By the way, I’ll be going through more bullets and source material like this, to figure out how great bullet writers do their business.

If this is something that interests you, you can sign up for my email newsletter here, because that way you’re sure to get my new research as soon as it comes out.

How to turn good copy into great copy

For the past several weeks I’ve been milking content ideas from a recent interview I heard with A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos. And I ain’t done yet. Here’s another valuable story from the same:

Once upon a time, while Parris was still getting his copy sea legs, he apprenticed under Clayton Makepeace.

Parris would write some copy. He’d submit it to Clayton. Clayton would fix it up, and the submit it to the client.

The clever thing Parris did was to ask Clayton for the final drafts. He’d go through and compare what Clayton had changed to the original he (Parris) had submitted.

As Parris got better and better through this process, there were fewer and fewer changes.

Until one time, there was only one change.

It was in a bit of copy that Parris had written about part-time jobs for people during retirement. One of these jobs was to be a mystery shopper. And it could earn you as much as $50,000 a year.

Pretty good, right?

Yes. Good. But then Clayton made it great, by adding a few words along the lines of:

“Imagine, $50,000 a year — just for going shopping!”

Parris said that Clayton was a natural-born persuader. And one powerful thing he did instinctively was help people “grasp the advantage.”

That’s a term from Vic Schwab’s book, How to Write a Good Advertisement. Schwab said you first show people an advantage… them you prove it… and then you help them grasp it.

You can do this grasping part in a bunch of different ways.

Clayton’s example above is of the form, “You’re doing X anyways, so why not get Y benefit?”

But there are many others. I spelled out a few of them to my email subscribers.

What? You’re not subscribed to my email newsletter? But you’re reading my stuff anyways, so why not get the full story, with all the lessons laid out on a platter for you? Here’s where to subscribe.

Can this A-list advice replace your customer avatar?

You’ve probably heard the ancient advice to write your sales copy to a customer avatar.

In other words, rather than thinking of your market as a gassy cloud, without substance or a face… you come up with a real person to represent your ideal customer.

So you have their name… a little blurb of who they are and what they want and what their problems are… and maybe even a photo you can look at.

And the advice is to write to this one person. Because instead of writing something vague and unbelievable… you will write something specific and real.

Sounds good. Except:

Your target audience might not be one single type of person. It might be two or three or more. For example, this daily newsletter I write? It goes out to business owners, marketers, established copywriters, and newbie copywriters.

Also, even though a customer avatar should be based on research… I find that in practice, it’s often an invention of the marketer’s mind. Because of this, a customer avatar can be misleading rather than helpful.

And as a third problem, a customer avatar might focus on the wrong things. Demographic info is often not relevant to making your sale. On the other hand, an avatar might miss crucial information to making the sale that is relevant. Two people standing shoulder by shoulder in the same market can be very different from each other.

So should you take your avatar and set it on fire, like the “Año Viejo” doll that Colombians burn on New Year’s Eve?

I’m not saying that. But there is an alternative to a customer avatar for you to consider.

It’s something I heard during a recent binge of listening to interviews with A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos.

Parris said to find the top 3 psychographic characteristics of your list. For example, for the Boardroom offers Parris often wrote for, these three characteristics were:

1. Paranoid (typical angles: What your bank doesn’t want you to know, 12 smiling swindlers)

2. Looking for an “angle” (a secret, a loophole, a way to get over)

3. Like to brag about how smart they are

When you figure out these top 3 psychographic characteristics, you can use them to inform your offers, your headlines, and your body copy. Take a look at any Boardroom control ever, and you will see it in practice. Something like, “Money-saving secrets your CPA is too dumb to know about.”

But your market might be different. Maybe they are gullible rather than skeptical. Maybe they need more proof than promises. Maybe they want a push-button solution, or maybe they have been trained to believe only hard work produces good results.

You can find all this out. Just look at what they’ve bought before… the copy that worked to sell them… and the copy that bombed.

Odds are, you will see patterns, unique insights, which might be different from standard copywriting dogma about what buttons you should push.

Write to these characteristics instead of to a made-up customer avatar… and you might develop magical persuasion powers, by tapping in to your prospect’s deep and unconscious triggers.

And for more information like this:

I have an email un-newsletter, full of age-old wisdom like what you just read. If you’d like to subscribe, click here and follow the simple instructions.

This bit of advice made an A-lister’s career

During a recent interview, A-list copywriter Parris Lampropolous shared a story from early in his career.

Back then, Parris was writing his first magalog.

A magalog, as you might know, is a format for sales copy that mimics a magazine. It was a popular way to sell newsletter subscriptions back in the 90s and 2000s, before the Internet started to have its finest hour.

A typical magalog had a main “message from the editor” that ran the length of the “magazine.” It also had a dozen sidebar articles on individual topics.

How to write all this shit? It seems like a huge amount of work, and it’s hard to know where to even start. And that’s how it seemed to Parris back when he had to write his first magalog.

So Parris asked his mentor, Clayton Makepeace, for advice. And Clayton told Parris writing a magalog was simple:

You start by writing a bunch of fascinations, aka bullets, based on the content you are selling.

Some of these fascinations will have weak payoffs. In other words, there’s a good chance the reader will be disappointed when he finds out the “secret.”

So those weak fascinations stay “blind” fascinations, and just go into the sales pitch that is the message from the editor.

But some fascinations will have great payoffs, real forehead-slapping stuff. Those fascinations become sidebar articles, and reveal the secret.

And Clayton also told Parris the following:

The first few pages of the magalog are all good content… then it shifts to being 50/50 sales and content… and by the end it’s all sales pitch.

That’s all it takes to write a magalog.

So that’s what Parris started to do, with great success. He went on to have magalog controls at major publishers like Boardroom… and some of those magalogs earned him $1M+ in royalties. In the interview, Parris said this bit of advice on how to write a magalog made his career.

“Great for Parris,” you might say. “But how am I supposed to use this info with today’s copy formats?”

I’m glad you ask. Because it seems to me the magalog advice maps neatly to writing emails to promote an information product.

​​Start with fascinations… write an email for each fascination… reveal the rare good payoff… keep the fascination with a weak payoff blind.

And if you run a campaign that’s got a deadline (and why wouldn’t you), you can even follow the magalog structure of keeping the first part of the sequence all good content… then 50/50 content and selling… and finally all teasing and pitch.

But that’s not all. You might be able to use this magalog advice for other copy formats too.

For example, tomorrow I’ll share how you can use it in a sales medium you’ve probably never heard about… the rare and elusive kindlealog.

If you’d like to read that article, you might like to sign up for my email list. It’s where my articles appear first, and with no fascinations kept blind, even the most underwhelming stuff. Click here if you’d like to sign up.

The breakthrough from the first time Parris Lampropoulos met Clayton Makepeace

Parris Lampropoulos once told a story about the first time he got to hang out with one of his mentors, Clayton Makepeace.

At this time, Clayton was one of the most successful freelance copywriters in the world. He had a list of controls longer than a giraffe’s tail. And he was pulling in over $1M a year, back when that was Hollywood money.

In part, Clayton did it by having a stable of talented junior copywriters, including Parris, working under him.

So at one point, Clayton invited the copywriters working for him out to Lake Tahoe. And it was a sight to see.

Clayton was staying there at the presidential suite at a ritzy hotel… getting pampered with massages and facials… eating out at the fanciest restaurants… and picking up the tab for his guests.

Generous.

And for Parris, a breakthrough.

Because at that time, Parris had already been a freelance copywriter for several years. He said he knew intellectually that a freelance copywriter could make Clayton-levels of money… but he still didn’t feel it deep inside.

He needed to see it with his own eyes, in order to make it a reality in his own life. Which is exactly what happened — in the months and years following that first in-person meeting with Clayton in Tahoe.

I bring this up because:

1) It might be useful to you if you are also hoping to reach Hollywood levels of success, and because

2) On a psychological level, your prospect is the same as Parris was back then.

Your prospect might know intellectually what you’re trying to convince him of… but odds are, he still doesn’t feel it deep down.

That’s why the most common writing advice is to show and not tell. And that’s why the most common copywriting advice is to use stories and demonstration. Because these are the most powerful tools you have to drive home a point — even one your prospect has heard a million times — and finally make it real.

And then, you can make your pitch. For example:

I have an email un-newsletter, where I talk about not new, but still valuable, fundamentals of persuasion and marketing. If you’d like to subscribe, here’s where to go.

How to get among the top 10% of all copywriters in one year

According to copywriter Victor Schwab, the three most expensive words in advertising are:

“My wife says.”

That might sound like an outdated notion. And no wonder.

Schwab wrote that observation in a book called How to Write a Good Advertisement, back in 1942. That was an eternity ago.

But Schwab’s book is still worth reading. And re-reading. In fact, I read it once last year and once more this year. And I will re-read it next year too.

That’s because I once heard A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos say to do it. Parris said that if you want to get among the top 10% of copywriters, the process is straightforward:

Just read his recommended list of 13 books 3 times each.

The first time, read them like beach reading. The second time. underline. The third time, copy out your notes by hand.

And Parris said that, if you want to, you can do this all in just one year. (I’m a slow reader so it’s taking longer.)

Anyways, Parris only shared his book list and the process above with his small group of copy cubs… and later, with people who heard him speak in one way or another.

I fell into the second group. So I never wrote about this list before because I figured it was one of Parris’s trade secrets.

And it was, until a few months ago. Because in a public interview that Parris gave then to The Copywriter Club people, he explained everything I just told you. And ever since, his list is up on the Copywriter Club website.

So do you have a year to spare? And would you like to improve your copywriting to the top 10% level? If so, here’s where to start:

https://thecopywriterclub.com/parris-book-list/

How to fake exciting discovery stories

Tony Robbins once shared a stage with a knight’s suit of armor.

At one point during his talk, Tony got close to the knight. Terrible static appeared on his mic. When he walked away, the static stopped.

The next time Tony got close to the knight, terrible static shot up again. He stepped away. The static stopped.

The third time it was about to happen, people in the audience started shouting. “Don’t get close to the knight!”

It turned out later than an ambulance in the neighborhood was somehow messing with Tony’s sound equipment. Once the ambulance left, the sound problems disappeared. It wasn’t the knight at all.

The human brain needs causation like a hot dog needs mustard. “Terrible sound! What’s behind it? It must be the knight!”

This works really well much of the time.

Sometimes it goes wrong, like in the Tony Robbins story above.

And in rare cases of clever persuasion… it can be used to lead people by the nose. For example:

During a webinar last year, Parris Lampropoulos analyzed a sales letter. It was written by his most successful copy cub.

The lead starts off with a true story of a 104-year-old scientist who won the Nobel Prize for her discoveries related to brain stuff.

The gist was this old lady saying, “I feel sharper now than when I was 20!”

The sales letter goes on to talk about the woman’s discoveries… and how the supplement for sale ties into her amazing research.

Now rewind.

Did you catch that?

It’s the same trick as with the knight above, at least for my hypergullible brain.

Because when I read this sales letter, my brain concluded, “Oh, she feels sharper because of her brain stuff discoveries. And this supplement is a way for me to tap into that, and get back what little I had when I was 20.”

But the sales letter doesn’t say that anywhere. The quaint old lady could have been feeling great because of her genetics… or because of her daily regimen of drinking beet juice. We just don’t know.

What we do know is that, when you’re writing copy, it’s best to have a genuine breakthrough coupled with an exciting discovery story.

But if you don’t have that… you can cheat. Just roll your breakthrough onto the stage… and then bring out an exciting story that’s not really about this discovery. Put them next to each other. Your prospect’s brain will do the rest.

Now rewind.

Did you catch that?

This whole article was a way of eliminating people who aren’t interested in persuasion or copywriting. Since you made it to the bottom, maybe this stuff interests you. In that case, you might like to sign up for my email newsletter.

How to create a selling style people love to read

Let’s talk about the infamous Arthur P. Johnson.

I say “infamous” because the man was as unlikely as anyone ever to become a successful sales copywriter.

Johnson graduated from Swarthmore College with highest honors. He then went to Oxford University for a graduate degree. He had ambitions of becoming a poet, and a backup plan of becoming an academic.

Yet, through a chance runin at a bar with a former classmate, Johnson gradually got sucked into the world of direct response. He first worked at the Franklin Mint, writing copy for collectibles (a good education — how do you sell something with no obvious benefits?).

He next worked in product development at another collectibles company. Finally, even though he did not want to write copy any more, he stumbled into freelance copywriting. And that’s when things really took off.

Johnson wrote controls for a number of major publishers, including Boardroom and Agora. He made himself a fortune in the process.

He was so successful he made it onto Brian Kurtz’s Mount Rushmore of greatest copywriters, along with Parris Lampropoulos, David Deutsch, and Eric Betuel.

And here’s the lesson. When Arthur P. Johnson was asked what he attributes his success to, he said the following:

“I think that I’m able to sell products in a more entertaining way than a lot of other people are. I think that being entertaining while you are selling is a big key to success in a very crowded marketplace these days, because you really have to buy people’s attention.”

Johnson did most of his work in the 90s and 2000s. But this lesson, about having to be entertaining to sell, is even more true today than it was back then.

I’m proof of this.

Not with these emails, where I rarely sell anything.

But starting earlier this year, I’ve helped move hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of ecommerce products.

​​I’ve done it by writing emails, much like this one, that tell some kind of story or share a joke or just a funny picture. And those emails most often link to advertorials I also wrote… which contain more of the same — stories, fake personal confessions, and light humor (so I think).

The thing is, I’m not particularly entertaining in real life, or when writing things other than copy. In other words, all this entertainment stuff can be learned by rote.

So how do you learn it?

Two ways:

First, start paying attention to the books, shows, emails, and movies you yourself find entertaining.

Second, read or re-read Commandment IX of my 10 Commandments of A-List Copywriters.

No, this chapter is not a how-to for writing entertaining copy. But it will give you some successful examples of such copy that are running right now.

Plus it will even give you some advice on who and what to study if you want to get better at entertaining in your copy.

And once you start to entertain in your copy, expect people to comment on how interesting your writing is. Expect to have them say how they look forward to hearing from you. And most of all, expect to have them buy — as long as you’ve got anything to sell.

Speaking of which, I happen to have something to sell tonight. In case you don’t yet have my 10 Commandments book, here’s the link:

https://bejakovic.com/10commandments