There’s a scene in The Princess Bride that’s very instructive for copywriters.
(If you haven’t seen the movie, go and watch it. It’s wonderful.)
Anyways, the scene is set in the hovel of Miracle Max, a miracle man who can bring people back from the dead.
And that’s why the main hero, Westley, is lying there dead on Miracle Max’s table.
But Max isn’t convinced he should bring Westley back to life.
So he takes a magical bellows, sticks it Westley’s mouth, and puffs some air into Westley’s dead body.
“Heey? Hello in there?” Max yells at Westley’s corpse. “What’s so important? Whatcha got here that’s worth living for?”
He then presses down on Westley’s chest. And out comes the response:
“TR…OOOOO…LUV…”
I thought of this scene today because I got some feedback from my copywriting coach.
He said my copy needed to be more theatrical.
More dramatic.
More “spicy.”
But how do you copy spicy?
Well, one option is to raise the stakes.
Or like William Goldman, the author of The Princess Bride, puts it,
“Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Love. Hate. Revenge. Giants. Beasts of all natures and descriptions. Truths. Passion. Miracles.”
Of course, you shouldn’t literally add fencing and giants and torture into your copy.
But if you keep these Goldman ideas in mind, you’ll find the equivalent stories in your prospect’s life… or in the back story of your guru… or in what your competition is doing.
Just make sure you write clearly so your prospects can understand you.
Because (as you can see at the end of the Miracle Max scene in the Princess Bride) “TR…OOOOO…LUV…” can be misheard as “to blave,” which as everybody knows, means, “to bluff.”
And nobdoy’s gonna do what you ask them to do, if they think your only goal is to cheat them or make money at their expense.