Copywriting

Are you Joe Hepp to the real con game?

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Yesterday, a friend and I spent a lot of time tracking down the phrase “Joe Hepp.”

It appears in A House of Games, a David Mamet film about con men.

“Are you Joe Hepp?” is apparently an old circus saying that means, “Are you a know-it-all?” It later morphed into, “Are you hep?” — meaning “are you in the know?” — and later hip, hippy, hipster, etc.

But here’s something you might find more interesting.

It’s the etymology of another phrase from A House of Games. It comes up when the main con man, Mike, talks about what a con game really is.

It’s short for confidence game, says Mike.

You might have already known that.

But do you know why it’s called a confidence game?

Not because the con man gains your confidence in order to cheat you. Instead, it’s because he gives you his confidence. And this makes you trust him, and makes you susceptible for manipulation and persuasion.

In other words, it’s the old reciprocity principle from Robert Cialdini’s book Influence.

Except, not as it’s applied in the lame and ineffective way of most marketers (“If I bombard my prospects with free pdfs and hard-teaching emails, then they will feel obliged to eventually buy from me”).

No.

There are much better, more subtle, and more effective ways to apply reciprocity — AKA the con game — to copywriting and marketing.

I won’t lay them out here.

But if you’d like to know what I have in mind, you might find some answers here:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

Silent stories run deep

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Yesterday, I walked into an unfamiliar room and got naked.

I took a warm shower, tiptoed over to a large, clam-like apparatus, and climbed in.

I closed the clam shell behind myself.

All around me was warm, salty water and complete darkness and silence.

I was in an isolation (or sensory deprivation) tank.

For the next hour or so, I lay there in the darkness, waiting for the visions to start.

At least, that’s what I’d read would happen. I got this idea from Paddy Chayefsky’s novel Altered States, in which a scientist starts experimenting with sensory deprivation and psychedelic drugs, and winds up transforming into an ape-like creature who runs amok in Central Park.

The story in the book is less kooky than this quick summary makes it sound.

And kooky or not, this story was enough to make “sensory deprivation” something I very much wanted to try.

Which is a lesson to keep in mind if you are trying to convince people of anything — particularly anything unusual, or something they might not know they want.

Just consider:

Had I read a sales letter, an advertorial, or a blog post with a headline like, “How to induce safe, drug-free hallucinations,” odds are the message would have just bounced off me.

In the best case, it might have gotten me interested, but it would have caused all sorts of objections and doubts to pop up as well.

But a story, in an obscure novel from 40 years ago, was enough to get me to seek out a “float” halfway around the world, without inquiring about the price, safety, or effectiveness of this experience.

And this all happened without even a call to action. Speaking of which:

If you are selling something to an “unaware” audience, and you want to try a story-based approach in your sales emails, then you might find some valuable pointers here:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

How to outguess “America’s greatest copywriter” for $100

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During his famous farewell seminar in 2006, Gary Bencivenga ran a “Pick The Winner” contest.

He’d show two different headlines or magalog covers and ask the audience to choose which one did better in a direct test. (Example: “HE PROVED IT to millions on PBS television…” vs. “Deadly artery plaque dissolved!”)

The interesting thing was that Gary himself admitted he wasn’t good at picking among these competing headlines.

Let me repeat this:

Gary Bencivenga, who has been called “America’s greatest copywriter,” admitted he can’t pick a winning headline from two solid but very different appeals.

​​So what hope do you have?

And if you can’t even hope to pick out a winning headline, how can you write a good ad?

After all, the headline often determines whether the rest of your ad will get a reading at all.

Before I answer this, let me switch gears for a second. And let me tell you about an interesting bit of research I came across in psychologist Daniel Kahneman’s Thinking, Fast and Slow.

Kahneman and another psychologist, Gary Klein, had very different attitudes about expert intuitions (such as the ability of a top copywriter to pick a winning headline).

Gary Klein was all for expert intuition.

He studied decision making among firefighters, and he had many reports of how firefighters would make gut calls that turned out to be the right call.

Kahneman, on the other hand, didn’t believe much in the power of expert intuition.

That’s because he spent his time looking at decision making in fields such as finance, where he found that expert intuition was often negatively correlated to the actual outcome. (In other words, once you hear what an expert stock broker advises, you should do the exact opposite.)

So Kahneman and Klein decided to collaborate and answer the following:

When can you trust experts? And how can you develop expert intuition that you can rely on?

It turns out there are two conditions.

First, the domain needs to be predictable enough. Emergency room cases are predictable — but the stock market is not.

Second, you need an opportunity to get feedback, and preferably a lot of feedback, relatively quickly.

So let’s get back to writing copy.

Looking at the two criteria above, you can see why even a top copywriter like Gary B. might not have great intuition when it comes to picking headline winners.

Even if you think an individual market (say, the market for weight loss advice in 2019) is more or less predictable…

It’s hard to get enough feedback on what the market would respond to if all you’ve got is one direct mailing every six months, like Gary used to have.

Fortunately, that’s not the situation we’re in any longer.

With $100, you can promote an offer on a PPC network like Google display, and perform dozens of different (and statistically valid) copy tests.

This way, you can get almost immediate feedback.

You can learn which appeals work.

Plus you will start to develop a world-class copy intuition, which will soon outstrip even great copy masters from earlier generations.

Which goes back to something I read from another top copywriter, Dan Ferrari:

“Winning at direct response is mostly a matter of taking as many swings as possible. The C-level marketers that test 50 promos per year will beat the A-list marketers that test 5. Over longer periods of time, as variability compounds, this will become even more pronounced.”

Anyways, maybe this is valuable if you’re looking to write good copy.

And if you want to see some “Pick The Winner” contests I’ve run with several email lists I manage, you might like the following:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

Fear and loathing in Facebook advertising

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I listened to a webinar a few days ago put on by two big name marketers.

The webinar was all about how to squeak more out of your marketing on Facebook, now that Facebook is cracking down on direct response ads.

The answer that these two big marketing guns had was to water down your copy. To change the main triggering words. To replace disgusting images with generic ones.

To me, this was code for more of the same, disguised in a way to make it palatable to Facebook.

And, again to my mind, underlying this new marketing approach was a continued emphasis on the emotions of fear and greed — and a bit of contempt for the customer.

Don’t get me wrong.

This marketing approach obviously works, and it’s definitely one way to get rich as a marketer. It’s also something I’ve been guilty of myself as a copywriter.

And yet, this is not the only way to succeed.

You can appeal to other emotions than fear and greed.

You can choose to make a good product rather than hyperactive marketing the core of your business.

You can look out for your customers rather than treat them with contempt.

And none of this has to be driven by altruism. As Mark Ford has written:

“Proponents of the fear-and-greed approach often argue that the smart thing to do is to follow a fear-based lead with an appeal to the prospect’s greed.

“But I have found that if you do that, you wind up attracting the kind of customer you don’t want: someone who is gullible and greedy.

“You can’t build a business by selling to the gullible and greedy. You can make scores, sometimes big scores. But you will never have a sustainably profitable business.”

This quote of Mark’s is something I keep coming back to often recently, and a kind of sign post I keep working my way towards.

And if you are a business owner or a copywriter, I think it’s a worthwhile idea to consider.

Anyways, if you have a business selling a good product and you want some help in marketing it — using copy that works in the interest of your customers — then you might like the following:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

Naked yoga for lonely, bearded old men

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Taking a naked yoga class is not so much about stretching.

Rather, it’s more about ogling the naked female instructor.

For example, a typical naked yoga class culminates in a pose known as “bird of paradise,” where the (naked) instructor stands on one leg and holds her other leg at a 180-degree angle.

I read about this in an article about bizarre courses you can now take around East London.

Along with naked yoga, you can also sign up for rope bondage classes, cuddle parties, and tantra workshops.

According to Samantha Rea, the author of the article, most of the interest is from men, typically “older, usually single, left-leaning middle-class guys who sometimes sport a man-bun and a big, bushy beard—lubricated with artisan beard-oil—along with loose cotton trousers.”

Samantha writes that, to her mind, these classes are not much different than getting a lap dance. The only real difference is “paying for a lap dance is a more honest transaction.”

And that brings me to the topic of selling in marketing.

Occasionally (though less often as I’ve continued to raise my copywriting rates), I still come across a business that would like to “increase engagement” with their prospects or customers.

Often, this is code for pumping out well-meaning content, without in any way trying to make the sale or promote the offers the business has.

It’s not the kind of job I take on.

For one, I focus on sales copywriting, which always aims to clearly get an action from the reader.

I do this because it gets clients results, which is good for me in the long term.

On a more astral plane, I feel that aiming to “increase engagement” without selling is much like lap dancing for the woke (as Samantha puts it).

If you ask me, it’s better to have the sales honestly out in the open.

Of course, that doesn’t mean you have to drum your prospects on the head with your sales pitch. It’s true people do not like to be sold to. That’s why your prospects should feel like they are buying because they want to, rather than because you have sold them.

The good news is, it’s not hard to get a grip on this skill.

Assuming you write to your prospects regularly about things they care about, in a fun and entertaining way. And if you want to find out in more detail how to do this, you might like the following:

The productivity benefits of dirty hostels and shared bathrooms

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Ben Settle wrote an email today with the subject line, “Why airports are the devil.”

Ben’s email is all about how he hates travel — the bacteria-infected airports, the dirty hostels, and the horror-filled lifestyle of a digital nomad.

Now, I hate many of the same things that Ben’s pointing out.

And yet, I still travel frequently and willingly.

And I think traveling is important — whether I like it or not.

That’s because I’ve noticed that when I sit at home and develop a daily routine, my brain slowly and imperceptibly starts to get slow, stupid, and depressed.

After a while, it simply refuses to work very well. It refuses to be active, creative, or engaged — because everything around me is too familiar.

The upshot is it starts to take me longer and longer to get work completed… Small obstacles become overwhelming… And I find it hard to stay motivated or positive.

Going for a trip clears all those cobwebs quickly and amps me up with energy for when I get back home. And that’s why I’m willing to submit to uncomfortable airplane seats or to bacteria in dodgy restaurants or embarrassment when having to deal with strangers in a strange land.

I’m sure there are many people who are like Ben, and who can thrive in their own home fortress, with a regular, familiar routine, day in and day out.

But I suspect many people are also like me.

The thing is, not everyone has a free and flexible lifestyle.

Many people who do get depressed and bored and inactive in their daily lives cannot travel and get new experiences whenever they want.

And so they seek novelty, stimulation, and entertainment wherever they can get it.

Usually through TV shows. Or social media. Or even in the marketing they are exposed to.

Which, in case you’ve got a business, is a great opportunity.

If you send marketing emails entertaining and challenging your audience, you can help your prospects make up for the fact they have routine and staid lives.

And if you want to see how I write such emails — even as I sleep on friends’ couches and expose myself to dangerous airport bacteria — then you might like the following:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

What if a client doesn’t have a unique selling proposition

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I just read a question by a frustrated copywriter.

He writes copy for a bunch of businesses that are “just like everyone else.”

They have no clear USP.

They sell the same products or services as their competitors.

And their ideal clients are “someone with a lot of money that has no sane reason to give it to them.”

So what do you do in this kind of situation?

How can you market a generic product or service?

The easy answer would be to say, find better clients, or help your clients improve their products and services.

But as I’ve written previously, that’s not always an option.

This is a situation I know well, because I’ve recently worked for several clients who specialize in selling generic, USP-free products.

In fact, that’s their entire business model.

Specifically, these clients sell their own white-labeled versions of currently popular ecommerce products, such as portable blenders or activated charcoal bags or shoe insoles.

For each of these products, there are typically dozens of competitors selling the exact same thing, and often at lower prices.

And yet, we’ve been able to make many of these offers profitable, and to do so to cold traffic from Facebook.

In my experience, it requires two things:

1. Amping up the emotion. The copy for these products tells cautionary, dramatic personal stories and ties them into the product. In effect, the copy tells the story of Little Red Riding Hood, and then mentions a flashing LED collar that keeps wolves at bay.

2. Selling the features to justify the purchase. The copy then talks about the non-unique features of the product and sells them on their benefits:

​​”And this anti-wolf LED collar lasts 6 hours on one charge — which means it will cover Little Red’s entire trip through the forest, even if she gets lost along the way.”

Of course, this won’t work to sell careful shoppers.

After all, the features aren’t unique, and the product might be available elsewhere for a lower price.

But like I said, the above 1-2 punch is effective in selling enough people to make many of these offers profitable.

I hope this helps you if you have to sell a generic, non-differentiated product.

And if you want to talk about having me write your Little Red Riding Hood cautionary tales, write me an email and get in touch.

Needs more Gordon Gekko

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There’s a unique glass skyscraper along the Chicago riverfront.

It was built in the 1980s and it doesn’t have a rectangular cross section.

Instead, it has sawtooth corners — basically, instead of having 4 corners, it has something like 16 corners.

This design was to accommodate the Gordon Gekko priorities of that decade.

People cared about money, power, and prestige first, and having the corner office was the best embodiment of that.

And so even the buildings of the 1980s adapted to meet these increased corner-office demands.

I found out about this yesterday during a riverboat architectural tour of Chicago.

It was details like this that made the tour worth taking, in spite of hte terrible weather and the Chicago wind.

The thing is, the tour didn’t start out with these kinds of interesting stories and cute explanations.

Instead, the guide started by pointing at skyscraper after skyscraper and saying, “That’s the XY building, built in 19XX by the XYZ architecture company.”

This went on for the first 20 minutes.

Had I not been captive on the boat, I would have definitely stopped listening to the tour guide’s message.

And I think this is a simple and clear lesson that applies to writing good sales copy as well.

It applies to to the kinds of messages your audience will actually hear and respond to…

As well as how you should structure a longer sales message.

And that’s why “more Gordon Gekko” is something I’d recommend in case you’re writing copy for yourself or for anybody else.

And in case you want more tips about how to write story-based, interesting copy that gets to the good parts quickly, check out the following offer:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

How to write copy and influence people

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I recently read a personal story about Andrew Carnegie, one of the richest Americans of all time.

Carnegie had a couple of nephews who studied at Yale University.

These guys never wrote their mother, and they paid no attention to their mother’s frantic letters asking them if they are ok.

Andrew Carnegie wagered a hundred dollars he could get an answer from his nephews by return mail — without even asking for it.

So he wrote them a chatty letter.

In the postscript, he mentioned casually he was sending each of them a five-dollar bill.

But he neglected to enclose the money.

Sure enough, replies came from the two nephews, thanking uncle Andrew for his letter, and letting him know him he forgot to send them the money he mentioned.

By the way, I read this story in a book written by another Carnegie.

That’s Dale Carnegie, in his book How to Win Friends and Influence People.

And I think this story does a good job illustrating the fundamental principle behind the whole How to Win Friends book. I believe this principle is also the fundamental rule of copywriting — the first thing I would tell anybody who is looking to write sales copy, whether for their own business or for a client.

I won’t spell this rule out for you here.

But if you want to see how you can put it into action when writing your own copy — specifically your own sales emails — then check out hte following:

https://bejakovic.com/profitable-health-emails/

How to hire a copywriter without falling into a trance

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“So if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.”
— Dale Carnegie

Earlier this year, I wrote a book about how to succeed as a copywriter on Upwork.

And in my opinion, one of the most valuable tips in that book was how to handle interviews with potential clients.

​​When a client starts off an interview by asking me why they should hire me, I usually respond with something like:

“I’d definitely like to answer that for you. But I want to make sure I’m speaking to the things you care about. So can you first tell me what’s most important for you on this project?”

5 out of 6 times, this puts clients into a trance state.

They start talking…

And they keep talking…

And 20 minutes of talking later, without knowing anything about me, they will often say:

“John, it really sounds like you might be perfect for this job. When could you start?”

This is great for me. But what about the clients? Are they really making smart decisions in this half-drunken trance state?

I got to thinking about this today when I saw a question on Facebook from a guy named Dave. Dave asks:

“What is the best way to hire a freelance copywriter? What kind of questions should I be asking?”

One of the people in the comments responded by saying that clients should NOT ask questions — instead they should evaluate the copywriter based on how well he asks questions.

Like I said, I don’t think this is enough. Asking good questions — while it is an important sales skill — is not the the same thing as writing effective sales copy.

So I think clients should take a page out of Dale Carnegie’s book.

Yes, allow the copywriter to ask you questions, and see whether he understands your particular situation and goals.

But at that point, get genuinely interested in the copywriter. And ask your own questions to see if this is a person you would like to work with. Questions such as:

What’s your process for writing copy?
How do you do research?
What are you looking for when you do research?
What kinds of clients do you like to work with?
What similar projects have you worked on?
What kind of results can we expect?
What do you need from me?

I can’t give you specific right answers to look for here.

But I think asking these questions will help you figure out if this copywriter is experienced, competent, and trustworthy.

And if you want to ask me those questions — after you’ve told me all about yourself — then get in touch with me and we can find a time to talk.