Drama

A peek behind the scenes of a smashingly successful launch

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A while back, copywritress Liza Schermann, whom I’ve promoted in this newsletter as somebody who writes interesting, funny, and — I’m ashamed to say this — even sexy emails, went through my Copy Riddles program.

​​Liza had this to say about it:

“The entire course is an a-ha moment. Because you see these things from other copywriters or you read other copy, but you don’t see what’s behind it or why it’s working. Your course shows what happens behind the scenes.”

As an example of that, consider another revealing thing Liza told me:

This summer, she went through Copy Riddles for a second time as a refresher.

​​She applied the bullet lessons in Copy Riddles to a rewrite of an email launch sequence for a client. The client sent out this rewritten email sequence to an already spent list, promoting the same tired offer, for a second run of this launch, and—

Ended up making NOT just a few extra sales from that spent list and tired offer…

NOT just matching the sales she made the first time around…

But actually making 150% of the money she made during the first launch, when the list was entirely fresh!

As a result, Liza says, the client “was over the moon. So much so that she recommended me to a friend of hers who also has a language course.”

Incredible! Amazing! A miracle!

Well… about that.

It turns out the reality is a tad more murky. Liza told me that for this second launch:

– The price tag for the offer increased, and
– The list was significantly larger than the first time around, and yet,
– The client actually made fewer sales than first time, though the total money was more.

So was that second launch actually a success or no? And if it was, did Liza’s new copy, and her time inside Copy Riddles, have anything to do with that 150% of money made?

If you ask me, money made is more important than number of sales made. And fewer customers at a higher price are better than more customers at lower price.

Also, having seen Liza’s rewritten emails before and after, I personally believe that the “after” was stronger and contributed to that extra 50% in money made.

Whatever the case, here’s the behind-the-scenes point:

Imagine if I had cut off this email at “Incredible! Amazing! A miracle!”

​​Imagine I had dropped all that murky stuff about price increases and a larger list.

​​Imagine if I had simply kept the picture sharp and clear and said, “… and that kind of smashing success, ladies and gentlemen, shows the power of Copy Riddles, which you can invest in today for the low, low price of…”

The fact is, that’s exactly what happens in copy all the time.

You don’t see all the facts behind the copy. You don’t see what the copywriter chose to omit, and you don’t see how he patiently twisted, polished, and positioned what he allowed you to see.

You might say that’s despicable or dishonest to hold back the whole, naked truth.

​​But to me it’s the essence of what copywriting is — creating a calculated perception, a gloss, a heart-pumping response. And yes, that’s true even in cases like my email today, where I’m making a seemingly transparent reveal and “taking you behind the scenes.”

Anyways, if you want interesting, funny, and — there’s that word again — even sexy emails for your business, you can try to hunt down and hire Liza. She has my full endorsement. And she might be taking on new clients, though I can’t say for sure.

On the other hand, if you write your own copy, or if you want to work with clients who pay you to write copy for them, then you might want to get on my daily email list, and experience more copywriting a-ha moments than you would ever believe possible. If you’re interested, click here and fill out the form that pops up.

Don’t read this email

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I bought an ugly pair of Patagonia swim trunks once. That’s why this morning, I felt emotionally invested in reading an article about Yvon Chouinard, the founder of Patagonia, and how he has just given away his entire $3 billion company to a climate-change nonprofit.

Chouinard was a early-generation rock climber, a bum who lived in his car and ate cat food to support his rock-climbing habit.

Later, Chouinard started Patagonia. After the company started selling millions and then billions of dollars of ugly swim trunks and other stuff, success never sat right with him.

Chouinard’s final solution was, like I told you above, to give away his entire company.

But even before that, Patagonia seemed to do strange and self-defeating things.

For example, back in 2011, on Black Friday, Patagonia ran a full-page ad in the New York Times. The headline of the ad ran:

“DON’T BUY THIS JACKET”

Below that was a picture of the R2 jacket, one of Patagonia’s best-selling items. The body copy of the ad explained in detail the environmental cost of producing each such jacket. “As is true of all things we can make and you can buy, this jacket comes with an environmental cost higher than its price.”

The direct result of this ad?

I have no idea. This was not your usual direct response ad. And if there were any measurable consequences of this ad, I couldn’t find any info about them online.

So rather than speculating whether DON’T BUY THIS JACKET is effective marketing, I will focus on one specific, certain thing about that Patagonia ad.

The body copy of that ad ended by advising New York Times readers,

“Don’t buy what you don’t need. Think twice before you buy anything.”

“Why the provocative headline,” Patagonia marketers wrote later on the company blog, “if we’re only asking people to buy less and buy more thoughtfully?” Answer:

​​”To call attention to the issue in a strong, clear way.”

A couple weeks ago, I stayed in an Airbnb and I found a copy of Paul Arden’s book, “It’s Not How Good You Are, It’s How Good You Want To Be.”

Arden was the creative director at Saatchi and Saatchi, one of the biggest brand advertising agencies in the world.

Arden’s book was mostly terrible. But the following idea, which ties up today’s email, makes the entire book more than worthwhile:

Find out what’s right about your product or service and then dramatize it, like a cartoonist exaggerates an action.

For example, you know a horse can jump a ditch, therefore you accept that it can jump the Grand Canyon.

This realization accelerated my career faster than anything I have learned since.

So yeah. Don’t read what you don’t need. Think twice before you open any email, particularly a marketing email. And take a moment before you click on any links that could suck you in or sell you stuff against your better interests.

On that note, if you enjoyed this email or even found it more valuable than anything else you have ever read, if you think today’s idea might even save your life one day, then here’s something else you might enjoy:

https://bejakovic.com/dont-listen-to-me-im-just-some-guy/

My “War of the Worlds” warning for copywriters and marketers

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I’ve been studying Spanish, and so I was both pleased and displeased to find a bunch of Spanish-language NPR podcasts that cover Latin America.

Pleased, because the podcasts are obviously interesting, as I will show you in a second.

Displeased, because the podcasts are really above my level. For example…

I had to listen to the first podcast three times. And then I followed along twice more with with transcript, just to make sure I understood it.

​​I’m not sure would have done that for the Spanish learning alone, but the podcast was relevant to this newsletter.

​​In a nut, here’s the story:

On Saturday, February 12, 1949, a local radio station in Quito, Ecuador put on a “radio novella” of the War of the Worlds. “The Martians are coming!”

As you probably know, 11 years earlier, Orson Welles had put on the same in the US.

​​In spite of real-life panic and outrage that Welles’s radio drama had created, for some reason the Quito people thought it would be a good idea to do the same.

And so, a few minutes after 9pm, as a popular musical duo played on the radio, the announcer came on and said,

“We interrupt this musical evening to bring you an urgent news update. According to the information of our reporters…”

According to the information of their reporters, Martian spaceships were attacking Latacunga, a town a few hours away from Quito.

The Martians destroyed Latacunga and then started advancing. With lightning speed.

You can guess how it went from there:

As the Martians progressed towards Quito, the Quiteños listening to the radio, which included pretty much everybody on a Saturday night, became panicked.

​​Some hid in cupboards and others started running and screaming in the streets. Still others took refuge in churches, praying for some kind of divine help. A bunch of people confessed their infidelities to their husbands or wives.

So you could say the “Guerra de los Mundos” was both a big success and a huge disaster, much like the Orson Welles original.

But here’s where the story takes a twist. Because when the radionovella finished, the radio announcer came on and said,

“It was all just a show, people. There are no Martians. Calm yourself, and enjoy the rest of your night.”

The panicked and agitated Quiteños didn’t calm down. But they sure enjoyed the rest of their night.

A large mob assembled outside the Radio Quito building. As the radio employees huddled inside, the mob started throwing bricks and stones at the windows.

And, because at the time it was common to walk around the largely unlit Quito with kerosene torches, the mob started lobbing these at the building as well.

Soon the building set on fire.

The angry mob brought cans of gasoline to add fuel to the fire and make sure the entire building burned down. When firefighters came to try to put out the flames, the mob drove them away. “If you so much as pour out a drop of water,” the mob threatened, “we will kill you.”

Eventually, the police managed to disperse the mob and the firefighters put out the fire. But by then, eight radio station employees had died from smoke inhalation and from burns.

What’s more, another dozen Quiteños died from heart attacks during the transmission. At least a few people jumped to their deaths from tall buildings rather than be annihilated by the Martian rays.

The next day, the Radio Quito building was completely burned down.

Leonardo Páez, the director of Radio Quito who had written and produced the “Guerra de los mundos,” had managed to escape through a window to an adjacent building. He was now on the lam, hiding from the angry mob. Eventually, he would be forced to run away to Venezuela, never to return.

Curious story, right?

And like I say, relevant to this newsletter, which is about copywriting and marketing.

A few weeks ago, I heard a successful copywriter talk about his prospects as NPCs – non-playable characters. Basically, nonentities, without a soul, who are only there to advance your own quest.

From what I could understand, this copywriter was talking about it from perspective of,

​​”What does it do to you, as the copywriter, to interact with people in this way, and to treat others as just a means to your end?”

It may be bad for you psychologically.

And who knows. There might even be serious real-life consequences.

Like when you write a lead predicting the imminent End of America is here so you can sell stock picks… or announcing that fruits and vegetables are toxic so you can sell a greens powder… or breathlessly announcing an invasion of Obama clones, coming for your children, so you can sell a crank-powered radio…

In those cases, and even in less dramatic ones, who knows. Maybe one day an angry mob shows up outside your workplace and starts to throw kerosene torches at your windows.

But probably not, right? After all, the Internet provides us with way more insulation and security than those people at Radio Quito had.

Anyways, I don’t have a point here. I just wanted to tell you this NPR story and maybe get you thinking a bit. And also, to remind you I have a daily email newsletter. In case you’d like to sign up for it you can do that here.

The trick to getting away with a bunch of self-promotion and hard, hard teaching in your email marketing

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A few days ago, I got a question from reader Faith Ndangi. Faith was responding to an email in which I had a little thought bubble – a fantasy sequence in which I imagined being interviewed on CNN, before having my thought bubble pop. To which Faith wrote:

Okay John!

I love this story of you fantasizing being interviewed.

Personal yet you still keep your distance.

Was entertaining and fun too.

I would love to know the tricks and strategies you used to have that effect.

I guess Faith doesn’t like sharing personal details about herself on the Internet. So as a deal, I promised to tell her my “tricks and strategies” if she’d let me use her name and question in a newsletter email.

I also warned her it’s not much of a trick at all, though it is simple, and it is something you can use to make your copy, and really all your writing, much better.

Faith agreed.

So I will tell you my trick — even though it’s not much of a trick. ​​But first…

Have you heard about the new ‘Menstrual Dignity Act’?

Oregon Governor Kate Brown pushed it through recently. It’s a new law that will install tampon machines in boys’ bathrooms in Portland public schools. Each tampon machine will cost $400 and will dispense free tampons to boys.

The Governor says this will increase “menstrual equity” and will reduce the shame and stigma surrounding menstruation.

Opponents furiously disagree. They say this is a waste of public money, an invitation for mischief and bullying, and an attempt to push an LGBTQ agenda and destroy Oregon.

How do you feel?

Are you with the Governor, hopeful that laws like this, after some birthing pains, will bring about a new and better world? Or are you genuinely furious and outraged? Or, like me, are you just shaking your head and chuckling about how stupid people can be and how crazy the world has gotten?

Think about that for a moment. In the meantime, let’s get back on track.

The simple trick/strategy I used in that CNN email was to ask myself, how can I make the reader feel something?

After all, the rest of that email was a bunch of subtle self-promotion and hard teaching. Neither of those really stirs the body.

So I asked myself, how can I make the reader experience and feel something, anything?

​​In response, my brain popped up with that ridiculous CNN sequence — combining the feelings of vanity, foiled ambition, and familiarity.

It seems to have worked. It stirred something, in Faith’s case at least. And it didn’t matter those feelings weren’t particularly related to anything else I was talking about. In the words of Dan Kennedy:

Great copy agitates, and it doesn’t matter what the agitation is — you just need to agitate.

So that’s really what that whole Menstrual Dignity stuff above was about. Whatever your reaction was, I hope you felt something.

​​And now that I’ve hopefully agitated you through the feelings of curiosity, pride, or maybe insight, I want to get to the real point of this email.

Two days ago, I made an offer of consulting for the first time.

In spite of “consulting” not being a great offer, I’ve had a surprising number of people take me up on it already.

As a result, my consulting offer is becoming a little sharper, because it’s becoming clear there is demand for an email marketing audit. You know, where I look at your entire email funnel critically, from start to finish, and tell you what I would do to make more sales and get more engagement.

Do you feel this could be valuable for you? Or do you think it might increase dignity and equity, at least when it comes to your bottom line?

​​If you say yes, you can get started by filling out the form below:

https://bejakovic.com/consulting​​

Factual vs. emotional

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As I so often do, this morning I sat down at my writing desk, took a sip of my coffee, lit my pipe, put on my eyepatch, and started re-reading, for the 114th time, David Ogilvy’s self-promotional ad, How to Create Advertising That Sells.

As you probably know, Ogilvy’s ad is a collection of 38 bits of wisdom that Ogilvy learned by creating “over $1,480,000 worth of advertising.” Number 23 on the list is this:

23. Factual vs. emotional. Factual commercials tend to be more effective than emotional commercials.

However, Ogilvy & Mather has made some emotional commercials which have been successful in the marketplace. Among these are our campaigns for Maxwell House Coffee and Hershey’s Milk Chocolate.

I don’t know about you, but it sounds to me like Mr. Ogilvy is saying, “Certainly, emotional ads have been known to work… but it takes a true expert, someone like me, to pull it off. Otherwise, best stick to facts, facts, facts, or your advertising will pass like a ship in the night.”

That goes against a lot of copywriting advice you hear today.

Today, the main advice for copywriters is to agitate, scare, excite, outrage. Pile on the power words. Don’t tell people facts. They don’t care. But stir their emotions and they will buy.

So what gives? Was Ogilvy just writing at a different time? Or do different rules apply you promote Hershey’s Milk Chocolate in Life Magazine than when you promote, say, ProstaStream supplements on Clickbank?

Well, I can tell you a little personal story.

The single piece of copy that has paid me the most money to date, per word written, was a 317-word email I wrote a couple years ago, in 2020. It was full of facts, to support the idea that using hand sanitizer won’t get your hands as clean as washing your hands with soap and water. We were selling “paper soap” — little dental-floss sized dispensers of one-time soap flakes. And thanks to that fact-filled email, we sold, literally, a ton of paper soap.

“Yeah,” I hear you say, “but that was a unique moment. There was a lot of fear around corona, and everybody was in the mindset to keep their hands clean or die. You were just tapping into that.”

You’re right. And in a way, that’s the point.

Facts alone are like pebbles by the side of the road.

They’re not very impressive. Not very threatening. Not very useful.

But take some of those facts, and put them inside your prospect’s shoe. Suddenly, you have him squirming, and twisting, and looking to get rid of that discomfort and pain. And not only that. You have him taking that discomfort and pain with him — unlike power words and emotions, which are like a cloud of smoke that disappears in a few moments.

The bigger point is that, ideally, all aspects of your copy, or anything else you write, should do double or triple duty. Facts are no different.

Sure, facts provide concreteness and believability. But choose the right facts, and you will stir emotions also. After all, who really cares that, at 60 miles an hour, the loudest thing in this Rolls Royce is the electric clock? There must be something else going on there.

And now here’s a fact:

Every day, over 1,050 people are signed up to get emails with little bits of marketing wisdom like what you just read. If you’d like to join them, click here and fill out the form.

How I manipulated you, and how I might do it again

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It’s true. I shamelessly manipulated you. I might do it again. The worst thing is I’m so jaded I don’t think it’s a big deal any more.

I’ll explain everything. Let me start with this question I got two days ago, when I announced that enrollment for Copy Riddles is open again. A reader named Fanis wrote in:

I just read your entire sales page word-for-word and I love the concept!

The only thing that concerns me is you often talk about “getting away with extreme promises”, selling “uninteresting products”, “make up stuff”, and similar things. Now I am not against any of those, it’s just that my style of copy relies very heavily on bold honesty and staying away from over-hyping. Do you think Copy Riddles will still work for me? I really don’t want to be asking for a refund later (I’ve done it once and I hated it, because I hate it when they do it to me 😝)

It’s a fair question. Fanis is referring to these two bullets in the Copy Riddles sales letter:

* How A-list copywriters shamelessly make up facts and figures. Yep, they make up stuff, and you can do it too. It makes your copy more persuasive… and, as long as you follow what the A-listers do, the FTC won’t come a-knocking.

* The sneaky 7-word phrase Gary Bencivenga used to get away with making extreme promises. Gary was famous for providing proof in his copy… but this has nothing to do with proof. It’s pure A-list sleight-of-hand.

As I replied to Fanis, the objections he raises go to essence of what copywriting is. And that’s controlling attention and creating heightened emotions.

This means 1) stripping out details in your copy that don’t help your case (ie. not telling the whole truth)…

And 2) using reliable ways to get people more amped up than they would be normally.

That’s exactly what’s happening in those bullets above.

For example, it’s true that A-list copywriters sometimes make up facts and figures in a special way. But in every case I’ve seen of this technique, there was nothing devious or criminal about it. (Well, there was that Gary Halbert bullet with the “world-famous sex therapist”… but there’s a story behind that.)

In fact, the technique I’m describing in that bullet is worthwhile, solid, and maybe even unexciting. So of course, to sell that technique, I chose to omit those unhelpful details. And not only that.

I also chose to amp up the language and make it as dramatic as possible. “Shamelessly make up facts and figures.” What’s to be ashamed of, if you’re not doing anything criminal or devious? Nothing. Hence shameless, which is a powerful word to use in copy.

Because as you may have heard, people make decisions at an emotional level. Yes, you may have heard it. But you may still not get it, not deep in your gut.

So let me give you a second example, which might make you feel it:

Maybe you wouldn’t be reading this right now. Maybe not, had I written a less dramatic headline for today’s post. “How I heightened your emotions, and how I might do it again.”

“Sounds interesting,” you might have said. “Maybe later.”

That’s why I chose to use a more emotionally laden phrase. Manipulated you. It says much the same thing, but with negative connotations. And so, here we are.

Perhaps you’re inclined to shrug this example off. Perhaps you give me a free pass. After all, you’ve read halfway through this post already. Or maybe you kind of trust me.

But you shouldn’t discount what I did in today’s  headline. Because like I said, it goes to the essence of what copywriting is.

Like it or not, you’ve gotta poke, prod, jolt, shock, creep out, and unsettle people. You’ve gotta highlight what you want them to see, and hide everything else.

At least, that is, if you want to write sales copy… if you want to make decent money at it… and if you want to avoid struggling against the powerful current of human psychology.

Perhaps you’re not ok with that.

Perhaps, like Fanis above, and like me once upon a time, you’re still hoping you can write copy that “relies very heavily on bold honesty and staying away from over-hyping.”

If so, all I can say is godspeed. Maybe you will prove me wrong. Or maybe we will see each other again one day, after the market has broken your back.

But if you’ve made peace with consciously manipulating other people, both so you can 1) make money for yourself and 2) get solid, worthwhile, if unexciting solutions into the hands of people you’ve manipulated…

Then you’ll find that bullets are the #1 copywriting tool in more situations than you would ever believe.

And if you meditate on that sentence, you might be able to suck out a valuable persuasion lesson. But if you can’t get it, you can find it explained in round 6 of Copy Riddles, which you can sign up for until this Sunday, at 12 midnight PST. For more info on that:

https://copyriddles.com/

The real heroes are dead

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“As a soldier, Rick Rescorla served in Vietnam, where he earned a Silver Star, a Bronze Star, and also a Purple Heart. When he returned home, Rescorla landed a job as Head of Security for Morgan Stanley. And as you’ll soon see, in many ways, he was the best investment Morgan Stanley ever made.”

I’ve gotten interested in writing financial copy. So as the first step, I started watching financial promos while I eat lunch.

I got going yesterday, with a Stansberry VSL. The hook is the story of a U.S. Army vet named Rick Rescorla… who, the VSL tells you, could end up having an “enormous impact on you, your family, your money, your savings and investments.” And then it leads to the bit about Morgan Stanley and its best investment ever.

“This story sounds familiar,” I said.

“An Army vet… going to work on Wall Street… as Head of Security… where did I read this before?”

I typed a few words into Google. And yep, there it was. First result.

For many decades, the recommended bathroom reading material for copywriters was The National Enquirer. At least so claimed Gene Schwartz, who said:

“That’s why I say that the required medium for you is all the junk magazines in the United States. I would go out tomorrow and get a subscription to The National Enquirer and read every single word in it. That’s your audience. There are your headlines. There are your people and their feelings.”

But the Rick Rescorla story didn’t come from the National Enquirer. So I’d like to give you a different magazine recommendation as new required reading.

I’m talking about The New Yorker.

It’s a snob magazine. If you’re writing sales copy, it’s unlikely to reflect your audience or their feelings.

And yet I recommend it.

Because the New Yorker and its writers manage to dig up obscure stories… find the fascinating implications… and create drama through substance rather than form.

Stansberry’s Rick Rescorla hook came from The New Yorker.

And it’s not the only one.

If you’ve been reading my emails for a while, you know I’ve written about Dan Ferrari’s Genesis sales letter. It tripled response over the control and sold out the entire stock of Green Valley’s telomere supplement.

Dan’s sales letter kicked off with a snapshot. A secret meeting of Hollywood stars and Silicon Valley millionaires… gathered in a Malibu Beach cliffside mansion… to listen to a Nobel-winning scientist reveal her breakthrough research on doing away with death and old age.

That story was true. And it also came from The New Yorker.

“All right Bejako,” I hear you saying. “You almost have me convinced. Two examples is good. But where’s your third example? Don’t know you all copywriting proof comes in threes?”

You got me. I only have the two examples above to give you.

If that’s enough of a pattern for you to work with, then start scanning The New Yorker and checking if some of their stories could be used for your hooks.

And maybe you will be my third example one day… or maybe I will be, because it’s what I’ll start doing.

In any case, if you’d like to read why Rick Rescorla was the best investment Morgan Stanley ever made, follow the link below.

But before you go, consider signing up for my email newsletter, which serves you up with a daily idea or recommendation for improving your marketing or copywriting.

And now, here’s the tight, fascinating, and moving New Yorker article about Rick Rescorla:

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2002/02/11/the-real-heroes-are-dead

Why adults crave drama so much

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I’m not sure I could do this every day. Or that I would want to.

I spent today maneuvering a tiny little sailboat. Sun sea wind.

I am more physically tired now than that time 10 years ago, when I thought it was a good idea to start going to a boxing gym.

But after three days of supposed “sailing” over the past week, which involved either a complete lack of wind or a complete lack of control, I got both wind and some control today. I even hung my ass out of the boat and lay down almost flat on top of the waves, two thirds of me hanging off the side, to keep the thing from capsizing. It worked.

(I still ended up capsizing a few times. They tell me that’s normal.)

But let me get to the point:

​​I’m glad I’m making progress handling the boat. But I’m not sure I could do this every day. I’m too adult. ​​This craving for speed and the spending of physical energy is a kids’ game. I’d rather read a book or watch a movie.

Which brings me to a valuable quote I want to share with you.

​​It’s from playwright David Mamet, who wrote a book about drama that all copywriters should read. (Itsa called Three Uses of the Knife.)

And in the book, David gives the following bit, which is both a rare explanation for why we adults crave drama so much… as well as a reminder to put it in your copy — or suffer the consequences:

“Children jump around at the end of the day, to expend the last of that day’s energy. The adult equivalent, when the sun goes down, is to create or witness drama — which is to say, to order the universe into a comprehensible form. Our sundown play/film/gossip is the day’s last exercise of that survival mechanism. In it we attempt to discharge any residual perceptive energies in order to sleep. We will have drama in that spot, and if it’s not forthcoming we will cobble it together out of nothing.”

How to develop your voice even if you don’t have one

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I came across the following question today:

So this is one thing I’ve been trying to explore and develop.

I can write and convey ideas or messages, but it mostly comes out pretty dry (I’m a pretty boring person overall).

But I often read that punchy and upbeat copy, where you can really hear ‘voice’ and character come through.

Has anyone got any tips or articles or videos or professional quote makers they can recommend to develop this side of my writing?

Or should I just focus on writing dull informative stuff?

I’m also a pretty boring person, so this is a question I used to worry about as well. But I don’t worry about it any more. It seems to have taken care of itself. I asked myself how.

​​Here are a few ideas that came out — maybe they will be useful to you:

1. Write more. Swagger comes from lots of walking, up and down the same street.

2. Write faster. You’ll find stuff on the screen that makes your eyes pop out. “Where did that come from?”

3. Show and then tell. Punchy and upbeat copy is less about how you say it than about what you say. And it’s less about what you say than what happens in your reader’s head as a result.

4. Copy other writers for a while. I once read that Henry Miller would type up entire books by his favorite authors.

5. Self-consciously work on developing your voice. Invent your own phrases. Your own twists on cliches. Your own spelling. Most of it will be stupid. Most.

6. Infuse your own interests into your copy. Comedian Andrew Schulz: “Who cares if they relate to it? Make them relate to it.”

7. Get enthusiastic before you write.

8. Limit your editing. This is the second half of #2 above, for after you’ve finished writing.

9. Write more casual than you think is ok. You can always edit later.

10. Inject more drama. This goes back to #3 and #6 above. Your voice, like your writing in general, is more about what you say than how you say it.

And here’s a bonus #11:

Consciously do stuff that you know is wrong. For example, listicles like I’ve just written — they violate the Rule Of One, right?

​​Right. You probably won’t follow any of my ideas above, or even remember them come tomorrow. Even so. The more sacred a writing rule is, the more important it is to break it on occasion.

But here’s a rule that’s too sacred to break:

If you’re writing sales copy, you have to have a call to action. Otherwise the whole message was pointless. And in that spirit, my CTA to you is to sign up to my email newsletter about marketing and copywriting. If that’s something you can relate to, here’s where to go.

Conflict produced this legendary ad — do you know it?

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“We’ve spent a fortune,” screamed the red-faced exec, “but this damn thing still won’t sell! What the hell am I paying you people for?

The gray suits around the table hung their heads.

The time was 1911.

The executives at Colliers Publishing had heard an incredible idea. It came from Harvard University President Charles Eliot.

Eliot said any man could get a world-class education in 15 minutes a day, just by reading a few books. All the books could fit onto a 5-foot shelf.

So the Collier’s people asked Eliot which books exactly… and Dr. Eliot’s Five Foot Shelf was born.

Collier’s ran ads in their own magazine to get leads for the Five Foot Shelf. The ads talked about the joy and satisfaction of owning and reading great books. They featured the Harvard coat of arms.

​​And yet the damn thing wouldn’t sell. It looked hopeless. But it turned around, by accident.

Advertising man Bruce Barton had to fill some empty advertising space. So he flipped open one of Dr. Eliot’s great books and landed on a picture of Marie Antoinette in a rickety peasant cart. He ripped the picture out. And he scribbled the headline above it:

“This is Marie Antoinette riding to her death. Have you ever read her tragic story?”

According to Barton, Marie Antoinette outpulled the old “joy and satisfaction” ads 8-to-1. She kept running successfully for years, and helped sell hundreds of thousands of copies of the Five Foot Bookshelf.

This shows the power of a dramatic snapshot. This is a great way to start your sales letters, advertorials, and even emails.

Of course, that’s not the only good thing Barton’s ad has going for it.

The whole thing is full of copywriting and marketing tricks which worked in 1921… and continue to work in 2021. It might be worth taking a look and seeing how many you can spot.

And if you’d like to do that, I’ve tracked down a copy of Bruce Barton’s original Marie Antoinette ad for you. You can find it below. And if you’d like more occasional trips down 1911 marketing lane, you can sign up for my email newsletter here.