This morning, I rolled out of the creaky hotel bed and stumbled across the dusty, cavernous old hotel room, past the sink, to the small table in the corner, which barely held my typewriter.
Suddenly, somebody started rapping on the door.
“Open up! Open up right now!”
I opened the door to find Octavia Campo, the wife of the hotel owner.
“If I told you once,” she said as she pushed her way past me, “I told you a thousand times!”
I rubbed my face and took a deep breath. “Good morning, Octavia.”
“Don’t good morning me,” she barked. “All night long, clack-clack-clack from your room. All my other guests are complaining! I told you a thousand times! This is a residential hotel! No typewriters! No work allowed here!”
I reached for my Tommy Bahama shirt. And then I walked over to my typewriter, and started to fit it in its carrying case.
Octavia Campo kept railing. “While you’re staying in my hotel” — here she pointed at her chest — “you will not be making any money! This isn’t some brothel, some butcher shop! I only want respectable guests here, who come to sleep and that’s it!”
“I understand completely,” I said. “I’ll take my typewriter now. And I’ll send a boy later for my clothes.”
Octavia’s face got tomato-red. “Good!” she said. “And don’t come back! I don’t want your kind in my hotel! You don’t care how you ruin the reputations of others!”
And that’s pretty much how I checked out of Hotel Octavia Campo… and checked into the shiny and new Bedazzling Happiness Towers, down by the beach, where the guests are free to do what they like in their rooms, and the air is fresh.
Maybe you’re wondering what I’m on about. Well, about that:
Starting a week ago, I’ve been writing and sending my new, daily health newsletter. I’ve been writing and sending it from Hotel Octavia Campo — aka ActiveCampaign.
But then this morning, I got a note from ActiveCampaign telling me that my email from yesterday was not sent. Why? Because it contained an affiliate link.
The note I got from ActiveCampaign wasn’t as shrill as I tried to make Octavia Campo sound. It even offered suggestions for some workarounds.
But still, it was more than I was willing to tolerate.
So I spent about a half hour this morning to move my daily health newsletter to shiny and new Beehiiv, the platform I already use for my weekly health newsletter. I’m not really sure why I didn’t do this in the first place.
In time, I might even move this marketing newsletter over to Beehiiv, because I’m so fed up with ActiveCampaign, and so satisfied with Beehiiv — Bedazzling Happiness.
You might think I will promote Beehiiv at this point, using — gasp — an affiliate link.
But no, and not just because ActiveCampaign might throttle me for doing so.
Today I have a special, one-day, newsletter-related offer to celebrate my move to Bedazzling Happiness Towers.
As you might know, I’m planning to launch a newsletter-related community soon, all about how to publish, grow, and monetize a newsletter.
I haven’t decided exactly how that will look, what it will cost, and what it will include.
But I know it won’t be nearly as one-on-one and as generous as the following offer:
Today only, I’m offering a 1-hour consult at a price I would never offer it otherwise, $100.
This consult is for you if you already publish a newsletter, and want to grow it or monetize it better… or you do not yet publish a newsletter, and you want help in picking a niche, a concept, or a content strategy.
I am willing to sit with you, listen to you, answer your questions, offer my feedback and experience and advice, based on what I’ve learned writing this daily marketing newsletter over the past five years, my weekly health newsletter over the past year, and my daily health newsletter over the past week.
I want to help you succeed with your newsletter, or succeed more. I will share whatever information you can squeeze out of me in an hour, I won’t hold anything back, and I will give you my best ideas.
The only reason I am offering to do this, and at such a low price, is because 1) I’m in a good mood thanks to (at least partly) moving out of Hotel Octavia Campo, and 2) as research and prep for that newsletter community I’m planning.
Speaking of:
If you take me up on this 1-hour consult, I will also apply it to that future community, so you get one month of it for free.
Today’s offer won’t make me rich, and it will require me to work. So I’m limiting it to the first three people who take me up on it.
The cart link is below. If you send me the $100, we can then figure out a time to get on the call that works for both of us.
And if the link below isn’t working, that means three people already signed up, and I’ve turned this offer off.
So in case you’d like in, best move now and move fast: