About a month ago, my friend Sam forwarded me a WSJ article about a Ford executive named Mike O’Brien. Over the course of his decades-long career, O’Brien compiled a list, 2,229 items long, of his colleagues’ corporate malapropisms. A few examples:
“I don’t want to sound like a broken drum here, but…”
“Let’s not reinvent the ocean.”
“It’s no skin on our back.”
“Too many cooks in the soup.”
“We need to talk about the elephant in the closet.”
Last night, I called my mom. She’s one of the people I’ve sent an early draft of my new 10 Commandments book to. Being my mom, she’s found the book tremendous. “I’m just so impressed that you know so many facts, and can refer to all these stories, and know the names of all the directors and the screenwriters of the movies you talk about…”
I had to set my mom straight.
It’s writing. Writing.
My mom wouldn’t agree with this, but the fact is, in real life, I’m not all that smart, educated, or informed.
I say stupid stuff all the time. I don’t remember names or dates at all. I’m prone to using cliches and saying generalities. I’ve definitely slipped into worse malaprops than the ones above from O’Brien.
But in writing, it doesn’t matter. In writing, you can take a moment to think. You can look things up. You can pack your writing full of relevant facts. You can edit, so you don’t publish something that ends up stabbing you in the foot.
I don’t know if anybody needed to hear that or not.
In any case, my new 10 Commandments book, which will have a chapter about the elephant in the closet, is nearing publication.
Yesterday, I made an offer related to this book, or maybe asked for a favor. Let me repeat that once more:
Do you have an audience of your own? A newsletter, an online community, a local book club or bingo group?
What I want is for you to promote my book when it comes out. Of course, that means nothing to you and does nothing for you. I don’t know what I can offer you to make it worth your while to promote my book when it comes out, but I am open to all kinds of ideas, from straightforward to outlandish.
If you are open to it as well, at least in theory, hit reply. Let’s talk, and maybe we can figure something out that works for both of us.