Anonymous personal guru

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“It’s anonymous,” he said. “They never see me or find out who I am.”

I took my face out from the little plate filled with different cheeses. I leaned back in my seat. “So how do you deliver it?”

“It’s just audio of me talking. They don’t see me. And I never say what my name is.”

I was getting excited. “But what about your high-end coaching clients, the ones who are paying you a grand?”

“Yeah, we get on a Zoom call. They do see my face, and I tell them my first name. But they still don’t know who I am.”

During the Gdansk conference, I met a copywriter who’s kind of a big thing on copywriting Twitter. But his Twitter account is anonymous. He only goes by Mercure.

A couple months ago, he launched a couple coaching offers.

The quirky sales page for these offers reads and looks like a detective pulp novel. It’s red font on black background and there’s an mp3 clip at the top, hosted on Soundcloud, that sets the mood with a kind of film noir soundtrack.

The “beginner copy camp” offer sold on this page is 200 euro. The “intermediate copy camp” is 1000 euro.

A bunch of people have bought, at both levels. And they keep buying. Even so, they don’t get to find out who Mercure is.

I’m telling you this for two reasons.

One, because Twitter might not be the meme-filled sewer I always assumed it was. I spent much of the farewell dinner at the Gdansk conference grilling this guy about what he does on Twitter and how. It all sounded very positive.

Reason two is, to remind you that you can do things your own way, and it can still work.

This guy never shares his name online, either on Twitter or to his customers. He never shares anything personal about himself, beyond the fact that he’s a successful copywriter. He says he also never engages in drama or mud-slinging or taking sides.

He has a sales page that looks like it was made by a teenager in 2001 using raw HTML… he makes people submit proof they are actually intermediate copywriters if they want to join his higher-tiered thing… he kicks people out of the coaching if they don’t do the work, and he doesn’t refund them — it’s part of the deal.

And yet, it works.

Maybe you don’t want to get on Twitter. Maybe you have no problem sharing your personal life online. Maybe you like engaging in drama.

All that’s fine. I’m just telling you there really are options. Lots of things can work, as long as you get some of the basics down.

If you want to see some of that in action, then I’ll point you to Mercure on Twitter.

He and I didn’t talk about doing any kind of cross-promotion. He doesn’t know I am writing about him. In fact, we haven’t talked since the farewell Gdansk dinner.

I’m just telling you about him because I think you might benefit from knowing about the guy — either directly, via what he does, or just as inspiration, via how he does it. In case you are curious:

https://twitter.com/MercureCopy

“If you’re a copywriter and you don’t do consulting…”

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On the last day of the copywriting conference in Gdansk, A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos gave his second talk.

As part of the talk, Parris said something encouraging and nurturing:

“If you’re a copywriter and you don’t do consulting — let me put this delicately – you’re a fucking idiot.”

In my email from a couple days ago, I asked readers what they know that they could sell.

I got a lot of responses to that email. Most of the ideas I heard I thought were very sellable. A few I was ready to pay money for then and there.

I wonder what will come of all those ideas. I hope many will in fact turn into something. And maybe Parris’s encouraging and nurturing words above will help somebody transform their sellable knowledge into cash.

If you’re a copywriter… or you like the idea of offering consulting, but something is blocking you… you might like my daily email newsletter. I occasionally share ideas which you might find valuable. Click here to sign up.

Non-scientific advertising

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The copywriting conference is over.

I’m at the Gdansk airport, wandering around and looking for my gate. Surprise. I come across a glass display case with a taxidermied bear inside.

It’s not an eastern European way of entertaining passengers. Rather, it’s a message from the WWF about trafficking in rare animals and animal products.

Besides the whole taxidermied bear, the glass case contains a bear head, a cheetah pelt, a skinned python, several pairs of snake leather slippers, taxidermied alligators and iguanas, a bunch of coral, and a giant turtle shell.

Those are the souvenirs. Then there’s the charms, potions, and amulets.

Cobratoxan. Seahorse capsules. Little carved ivory Buddhas. Skin caviar, with extract of sturgeon eggs. Bear balsam, with real bear inside.

Was the copywriting conference worth attending?

I’m 100% glad I came. I’ll see how it pays off and when. One thing I do know:

Marketing is like magic. Words and formulas have real power. Money can appear out of nowhere. And none of it happens without belief.

It’s time for me to board my plane and head back home. I’ll be back tomorrow with another email. If you’d like to read that, you can sign up for my email newsletter here.

The fastest, but certainly not the newest, way to cash

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Day 3 of the copywriting conference.

​​You can’t make an omelette without cracking two to three eggs, and you can’t go to a copywriting conference without getting your brain scrambled with hundreds of different ideas, stories, pitches, open loops that never get closed, jokes, not-jokes, cliches, and important takeaways.

Let me pull it together for a moment and tell you about the fastest way to cash. It’s not the newest way to cash. In fact it’s not new at all. I’m sure you’ve heard about it. But maybe you need a reminder.

Yesterday, one of the speakers, Adam Urbanski, said the fastest path to cash, in his experience, is to sell what you know.

The day before, Barry Randall, who I wrote about in my email yesterday, said something similar.

Barry said that what he does is, learn something, keep it simple, and then sell it. On the other hand, what most other people do is learn something, complicate it, and then get stuck.

I’m not sure those are Barry’s exact words. In spite of 51 pages of notes so far, I didn’t write that bit down. I’ll have to seek him out today and confirm it.

Meanwhile, I have a deal for you:

Sign up to my email newsletter.

When you get my welcome email, hit reply and tell me what you have learned that you can sell. I genuinely want to know.

In return, I will reply to you and tell you a practical tip to make your presentation better if you ever do sell that knowledge you have in your head.

This tip is something that popped up in my head yesterday during Adam Urbanski’s presentation.

Adam’s presentation was excellent and very effective. But I believe with a small tweak it could be even more effective.

​​I won’t seek out Adam today and tell him that — nobody wants an unsolicited critique. But if you like, hit reply, tell me what you have learned that you can sell, and I will tell you what I have in mind.

Day 2 at a copywriting conference starts in bed

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Last night, I slept through the night. I don’t remember the last time I slept through the night.

But yesterday I was exhausted. It was day 1 of a copywriting and marketing conference I’m attending.

It’s been a strange experience. The talks are interesting. The people are nice and smart and many are very successful.

But yesterday afternoon, when it was time for the second coffee break — the fourth networking opportunity of the day to that point — I had to leave and just go out for a walk and get away. So much listening and talking in such a short space.

All in all, I counted 12 hours of strenuous ear or mouth work yesterday. That’s why I managed to sleep through the night.

In another half hour, it will be time to start the second day.

I still have to shower. I have to get dressed. And I have to rouse whatever socializing energy is left in me for the morning coffee. It’s not the coffee that will require an effort but the inevitable socializing.

Since there isn’t much time, let me quickly tell you the best thing I heard during yesterday’s talks.

Well, really the best thing was listening to Drayton Bird, who is 87, but who was so full of energy and charm and stories — “…and then Gene Schwartz asked me to show him my headline. He showed me his. They were identical…”

Those kinds of stories were really the highlight.

But the best takeaway I heard came from business owner Barry Randall. Barry is apparently renowned for getting things done. So much so that A-list copywriter John Carlton has apparently invented a “Barry Quotient,” which I guess is defined as the fraction of good ideas you implement over the good ideas you hear about.

How does Barry maintain a super high Barry Quotient? One thing he said, which stuck with me, is:

“Simple ALWAYS gets done”

Maybe you shrug. Maybe you say that’s obvious and nothing new. It sounded profound to me. But maybe that’s because I heard it live. And maybe that’s really the advantage of a live event over an email or paper newsletter, even if they share the exact same ideas or strategies.

In any case, this simple email must end here. But if you want to read more simple advice, read my 10 Commandments book.

​​I’ve worked hard to make the simple advice in that book sound profound and impactful, even though it’s just a book, and not a live person talking to you.

Will any of the 10 pieces of advice in this book sound profound or impactful to you? Only one way to find out:

https://bejakovic.com/10commandments

Curious quirk at a copywriting conference

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“So what do you do?” she asked me.

“Nothing much,” I said.

The cheerful English woman laughed. “But seriously, what do you do?”

I shrugged. “I write. Like everybody else here.”

Her eyes got wide. “But I don’t write anything!”

Last night, I spent a bizarre two hours, standing around with a glass of sparkling water and a plate of little croissants in my hands, talking to anybody who passed within arms reach of me.

I would start a conversation by saying, “Hello, I’m John.” And then I would try to keep that conversation going as long as I could without saying anything about copywriting, marketing, or sales funnels.

Inevitably though, everybody I talked to revealed they are a copywriter within a minute or two.

“I write for a supplement company.” “Oh I work for the Motley Fool.” “I’m in the prepper niche.”

It’s not surprising the restaurant was filled with copywriters. After all, it’s a copywriting and direct marketing conference I am attending.

When I asked people why they are here, many of them said it’s because A-list copywriter Parris Lampropoulos is giving a talk. Indeed, there was Parris, working the room and chatting with everyone. He had on a colorful shirt. “It’s a Robert Graham,” Parris said. “I put his kids through college.”

At some point, I realized there were two tablefuls of people that had not gotten up during the whole night. I hadn’t talked to anybody from either table. So I went over to one, and asked if I could join.

“Sure,” said the cheerful English woman.

We talked for a while about her Staffordshire bull terriers (9 of ’em!) and about the best years of her life (moving around in a camper van).

And then she asked me what I do. I tried to dodge the question. But eventually, I had to reveal that I too write. She said she doesn’t.

That was my first clue to a curious fact, which became revealed as the night went on.

For some reason, all the copywriters were standing around the bar and buffet. All the business owners were seated at the two tables, and they weren’t budging.

Maybe the copywriters are hungry, and the business owners are not?

Or maybe it was just a quirk of last night?

In any case, if you ever do attend a copywriting conference, and you’re a hungry copywriter looking for work — not my current situation, thank God — then keep this possible quirk in mind. And gravitate to the tables where nobody seems willing to budge.

It’s 8:07am as I write this. In another 10 minutes, the conference is supposed to start. I will be there exactly on time, because I’m hoping for coffee.

Which means it’s time for me to go. ​​

Meanwhile, if you want to read something that I learned from the great Parris Lampropoulos — perhaps the best thing I’ve learned from him — you can find that in Commandment II of my 10 Commandments of A-List Copywriters. The book is hiding on Amazon, unwilling to budge from its spot. But if you’re willing to go to it:

https://bejakovic.com/10commandments

I finally got my first 1-star review

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A few days ago, Amazon started showing Goodreads average ratings for books, right next to average Amazon ratings.

I know this because I have a book on Amazon, called 10 Commandments of A-List Copywriters. And every so often, I check how the book is doing.

The Amazon rating for my 10 Commandments book has held steady at an average 4.6 rating, based on 51 reviews. But thanks to the new change, I just found out my Goodreads rating is lower, just 4.45, based on 22 ratings.

I went to see what’s up.

It turns out I’ve gotten my first-ever 1-star review on Goodreads.

The review is written in Serbian, which once upon a time was the same language as my native Croatian. In other words, it’s a language I know quite well.

So here’s what that 1-star review says, as translated by BejakoGPT into English:

===

This book is more like a big ad for copywriters that the author chose as examples. It’s full of outdated tricks and the author openly praises several truly miserable writing tactics — for example, Sugarman’s tossing out a hook to readers about how a female client in a miniskirt came to see him, and he, poor guy, is married and is uncomfortable. And as for what happened next, you’ll find out if you keep reading. Seriously?

Besides this, the author is impressed how Gene Schwartz made a pile of money in the 1950s and bought a penthouse while writing ads for only 3 hours a day. Knock knock, 2022 is calling and it wants to know, are you for real?

Beyond that I won’t comment on the uncreative direct response tricks which were cheesy even in the 50s, I cringe at those texts. (“Did you catch that? We started out talking about clever ways doctors keep from getting the common cold. Now we’re talking about preventing cancer and Alzheimer’s. […] That’s a giant claim. Very likely, it would sound like hype if it came right in the headline. That’s why it takes an A-list copywriter like Parris to hold off on making this claim. He waits long enough that he can be sure his reader will believe him.” WHAT THE ACTUAL…)

===

“Seriously? Are you for real? WHAT THE ACTUAL…” To me those sound like the arguments of a 14-year-old, indignant about her 10pm curfew.

No sense in bickering with a teenager.

Fortunately, several adults have also read my book. Some of them have even written reviews. Right below the 1-star review by the 14-year-old, I got a 5-star review by an adult:

===

A great book for experienced copywriters who are looking for a quick refresher on the different styles with many examples from copywriting legends.

I’m subscribed to Bejakovic’s emails – and while I’ll admit I rarely check my inbox, I did happen to come across this one advertising this book, and I’m glad I did.

===

And right below that one, I got a 4-star review, also by an adult:

===

Short and very pertinent. Loaded with the names of hugely successful giants of the copywriting world and the titles of their successful books. I read the book on Kindle and highlighted many great bits of advice and the names of the great writers sharing advice. If you write ad copy for a living or hope to do so, buy this book.

===

Knock knock.

2023 is calling.

It wants to know, do you have a copy of my 10 Commandments book yet?

If you don’t, you can get one, and all the cheesy and outdated tricks inside it, at the link below:

https://bejakovic.com/10commandments

Why I would write daily emails even if they made zero money

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I just sent some feedback to one of my one-on-one coaching students about his email copy.

The core of his email is good. But parts of it are flowery, too clever, confusing.

​​So I told him to make the email simpler and clearer, more direct and less clever. And I rewrote parts of his copy to show him exactly what I mean.

I then sat down to write my own email.

​​I also have a tendency to get clever and confusing. The advice I gave my coaching student applies to me also. So I’m writing this email right now with this exact goal in mind, to make my copy simple and clear.

One of the big benefit of coaching others is to see consistent problems and mistakes across multiple people. This forces you to figure out what the underlying problem is, and what the fix might be. Odds are, these insights will apply to you as well, at least if you also do what you coach others to do.

The bigger picture is the benefit of teaching.

H​​elping others learn makes you better also.

I have changed and become much, much better at persuasion, marketing, and copywriting via writing daily emails about those topics for close to five years.

​​I’ve been forced to seek out interesting and valuable new ideas. I’ve been forced to understand them better, to connect them to other ideas. I remember all these ideas much better, and I sometimes I even remember to use them, by writing about them over and over and trying to present them clearly.

All that’s to say:

There’s great value in teaching what you’ve learned, way beyond the money you make and beyond any positive feedback you might get.

​​A daily email newsletter just happens to be an easy and natural format to do it in.

If you’re interested in learning more about persuasion, marketing, and copywriting, you can sign up to my daily newsletter here. I occasionally sell my courses and coaching through my newsletter. But I would write it even if I never sold anything.

I thought “fake news” was stupid but this is not

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A few weeks ago, I was reading an article about Ozempic, the diabetes drug that celebs are using to lose weight quick and easy. The article appeared in the New Yorker, which is not ashamed of its left-leaning proclivities.

One of the points in the article is that the main harm from obesity is negative perception both by doctors and obese people. In other words, it’s not the fat that’s the real problem.

​​To make its point, the article used the following statistics sleight-of-hand, which put a smile on my face:

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A recent study examined subjects’ B.M.I.s in relation to their blood pressure, cholesterol levels, and insulin resistance. Nearly a third of people with a “normal” B.M.I. had unhealthy metabolic metrics, and nearly half of those who were technically overweight were metabolically healthy. About a quarter of those who were classified as obese were healthy, too.

===

A few years ago, there was a lot of fuss over fake news. I always thought that fuss was stupid. Predictably, it has passed now.

I’m not advising anyone to write fake news or to make up stuff.

But you can and in fact you must spin. You must twist facts and figures, cherry pick quotes and stories, and direct and misdirect your readers’ attention at every step.

Not only to make your point, like in that “metabolically unhealthy” quote above.

But also to give people what they want. I mean, I read the New Yorker because I find the articles interesting and horizon-expanding. But I also read it because I enjoy agreeing with the writers’ points of view, and I enjoy even more disagreeing with their point of view.

I hope I’ve managed to get you to disagree with at least some of the points I’ve made in this email.

But if I’ve just managed to make you agree, I’ll have to settle for that today. Tomorrow, I’ll work to do better.

That’s the beauty of writing a daily email. You have a chance to constantly get better at influencing your audience, and to make your case anew, and to get people to agree or disagree with you. If you want to keep agreeing or disagreeing with me, starting tomorrow, you can sign up to my daily email newsletter here.

If you consider yourself a paid traffic expert

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If you consider yourself to be something of a paid traffic expert, or you want to be seen as such, I’ve got a lead gen/business idea for you.

​​I’m giving away this idea. You’re free to use it. In fact, I hope you do.

Here goes:

1. Start a newsletter. Call it “Classified Growth” or something sexy like that.

2. Go around, finding other newsletters that sell classified ads. There are hundreds or thousands of such newsletters, but they are not organized, and they often do not make it known they sell ads. You might have to email them and ask or suggest it.

By the way, I’m not talking about big featured ads like you can find inside Morning Brew, which have a big photo and hundreds of words of copy, and which are really intended for rich brand advertisers. Databases of newsletters offering those kinds of ads already exist.

​​I’m talking about small, classified-like ads, 100 words max, no picture, which can be integrated into the content of a newsletter, which are likely to cost a few hundred to maybe a thousand or so dollars, and which are perfect for advertising to get dedicated newsletter readers. As far as I know, there’s no source to tell you where to find those.

3. Each week, send out a new issue of your newsletter. Publish the latest classified ad opportunities you’ve found, and link to a page where you keep a running list of all the previous classified ad opportunities you’ve found.

4. Add in a little intro paragraph to each issue with your own voice so people know who you are. Casually mention any status-building things that happened to you or to your newsletter over the past week.

5. To grow your newsletter, do a good job implementing 1-4 above for four weeks, then email me and I will promote your newsletter to my list for free. I’ll also give you the contacts of 10 other people with sizable email lists who are likely to promote your new newsletter for free.

6. After you start getting people onto your newsletter, to monetize, sell your own consulting services or products or community, or sell ads, or sell affiliate offers.

The cons of this:

You’re likely to attract people who are at the early stage of newsletter growth. This means they are unproven and uncommitted — they might fail or quit.

​​And if they do succeed, they are likely to outgrow your newsletter and focus on other newsletter growth strategies that are easier to scale. That’s why I say this makes sense if you want to offer services or products around paid traffic and can use this as a lead-gen method.

The pros:

There is clearly demand. I would subscribe and read this newsletter each week, and others would too.

​​There are literally thousands of people with newsletters hoping to grow, and hundreds more joining every day. And since we’re talking about paid traffic, you’re likely to attract a serious segment of that audience, who might even have some money to spend.

So that’s my business idea for you. Again, I hope you run with it, because I would love to see it happen.

I’m currently working on growing two newsletters — the one you’re reading, and a second one that’s still in a bit of stealth mode, about a health topic.

In the past, to grow various newsletters I’ve had or have, I’ve run Facebook ads, solo ads, Twitter ads, paid “recommendations” like they have on Substack, banner ads, and classified ads in other newsletters.

The classified ads in other newsletters win in terms of quality of traffic.

The problem is, classified ads take time and are not scalable, but a resource like the one I describe above could help.

​​At the same time, it could help you build your own list, quickly, with highly qualified and valuable leads, that you could then monetize into submission.

Speaking of which, if you do launch the above newsletter, you’re likely to have more success selling your services or products if you drive your readers to a second, daily email newsletter like the one I write each day.

If you’d like to see how I do that each day, so you can model what I’m doing to make money, you can sign up to my newsletter here.​