Yesterday I asked readers for suggestions in dealing with an old-man back spasm that gripped me a few hours earlier.
Well I got suggestions.
Let me tell you some of ‘em, in the style of Paul Simon’s song 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover:
Limber up your hip, Chip
Take a magnesium pill, Bill
Stand more and sit less, Wes
Just listen to me
Roll on a massage ball, Paul
Become a supple leopard, Shepherd
Get some physiotherapy, Lee
And get yourself free
The people who wrote in with suggestions were not trying to sell me anything (thank God) and were just offering help.
(I appreciate everyone who took the time to write me. If I haven’t replied yet to you to say thanks, it’s only because I’m traveling today and am writing this from a plane somewhere between Vienna and Zagreb.)
That said, even though this was not a sales situation, I noticed something inside myself. It might be useful to you if you ever do try to sell people something.
Yesterday I said I’d entertain all suggestions for getting my back spasm to pass.
But today, as I was reading the suggestions my good readers sent in, I noticed I was immediately resistant to some.
It wasn’t because of the suggestions themselves, or because of the people who were giving the suggestion.
Instead it was the way those suggestions were made — with some small detail that simply didn’t fit with my actual situation.
For example:
One person mentioned lower back pain. That’s not where my pain is.
Others talked about chronic back pain. My thing is acute.
Sales trainer Dave Sandler called this “painting the seagull,” as in, forcing a seagull into your prospect’s mental vision of a beach, where the prospect doesn’t see one naturally.
Force the seagull in there, says Sandler, and you create a clash that makes the whole vision disappear. That was my experience today.
The fix to this is (switching metaphors) to play doctor. To ask more questions and get the “patient” to describe his own situation in detail.
Even if your diagnosis ultimately ends up the same, it’s much more likely to be accepted if you listen, and acknowledge the uniqueness of the person standing opposite you, and encourage their mental bubble to expand instead of doing something to make it pop.
This might be useful to you if you ever get on sales calls or anything like sales calls… with prospects for your coaching… or copywriting services… or simply your expensive-ass offer.
And if you want a new plan on how to sell or behave on sales calls, Sandler’s book is still my go-to recommendation. For more info, slip out the back, Jack: